Diagnosis or Value Judgment?

I've been doing some reading on Histrionic Personality Disorder, and I can't help but wonder that if some of the people writing the descriptions are somewhat biased (especially against women.) There was one website I found called nomarriage.com which really went to town on the diagnosis as a rationale as to why marry only "mail order brides" instead of American women. Of course, the coward didn't leave a place for email! So that's the reason why I am asking you folk about this...

I know a lot of people who fit the description, but there is nothing really "wrong" with them....except for people getting on their backs all the time and trying to change them into something they are not. Why is it that only one personality type is acceptable and others are not? So what if someone cries easier than someone else...doesn't mean the non-cryer is better or smarter or more rational...it could just mean they are heartless and cruel.

If some of these descriptions online re: HPD are to be believed, thenanyone who shows any short of emotions are bad and dysfunctional. There's nothing wrong with being demonstrative. ..as long as it's done in order. I grew up in a house where no one ever hugged or showed affection...I don't think that is healthy either!

If some of the HPD descriptions are to be believed... then ONLY the so-called "rational" and unemotional persons in our world are normal or sane.

One of the questions that is supposed to be asked of a would-be HPD is "do you think you would make a good actor/actress?" So what are these people implying? That anyone with a career in the performing arts is crazy? Please.

I also wish they'd define what "appropriate" in relationships? Who can tell someone else that, not knowing them. If a person for example was against interracial marriage...would they label someone who married outside their race as "pathological?"

I'm not saying HPD doesn't exist...but I AM saying that some of descriptions may be based more on "impressions" than on facts...or just plain mysogny...since the majority of people labeled as HPD are women.

I'm sure some of you will say I am HPD in denial, but go ahead and say it all you want. Just cuz you say it doesn't make it true.

"I know a lot of people who fit the description, but there is nothing really "wrong" with them....except for people getting on their backs all the time and trying to change them into something they are not."

If you're just an HPD's friend then you only have a vague idea of how hurtful they can be.

Most of the damage they inflict on people is done in their relationships not friendships though some of them do hurt their friends too by unexpectadly abandoning them for no apparent good reason as usually the reason was their mind suddenly told them that their old friends were no longer good enough anymore (even if last week the HPD was having the time of her life with them laughing at their jokes and thoroughly enjoying their company) so its time to seek out a cooler group.

"Why is it that only one personality type is acceptable and others are not?"

Buy Robert Hare's book Without Conscience: The Disturing World of the Psychopaths Among us as well as Al Bernstein's book Emotional Vampires. Read them. Then you will know.

"So what if someone cries easier than someone else...doesn't mean the non-cryer is better or smarter or more rational...it could just mean they are heartless and cruel."

Or it could mean they express their sorrow in different ways.

Not all people have to turn on the waterworks to be sad you know...

P.S: A lot of HPD's crying is crocodile tears mostly used in manipulation and even if the tears to get a guy to take them back are real its not because she hurt the guy and is sorry and suffering for it. Most of the time she is crying for herself and the abuse she suffered as a little girl that turned her into an HPD in the first place or if she just was born with HPD the tears are for her sadness only not her sorrow for your pain so yeah even if they are real tears they are mostly used for the double gift of manipulation and to genuinely work out her own personal sh*t. Oh and a third and final reason I just remembered is if they want a guy back really bad and are trying to convince him to take her back and its not working falling on deaf ears and such she gets frustrated (as HPD's get frustrated a lot easier than nons) and then she genuinely cries out of frustration for the guy to take her back and he buys into that and usually does thinking she is really crying because she's sorrowful but thats not the case. She's just frustrated lol.

"If some of these descriptions online re: HPD are to be believed, thenanyone who shows any short of emotions are bad and dysfunctional. There's nothing wrong with being demonstrative. ..as long as it's done in order. I grew up in a house where no one ever hugged or showed affection...I don't think that is healthy either!"

Yeah if you think you are HPD you might want to look up Narcissistic Personality Disorder as people who grow up to be HPD often have NPD parents who showed them no love as a child ie hugs and affection. Not always the case but if a person believes themselves to be HPD they might as well do some reading on NPD to see if thats the kind of household they grew up in.

"If some of the HPD descriptions are to be believed... then ONLY the so-called "rational" and unemotional persons in our world are normal or sane."

No, its ok to be a dramatic personality, to be an emotional person but HPD's are clearly seperated from the healthy dramatic personality type by their callous unconcern for the rights of others. Their feelings tend to be the top priority to them not whether they hurt someone else. They do feel bad about hurting people but quickly use denial and dissociation to block the knowledge of what they've done out so they can go on living with themselves. Rather than trying to make amends and apologizing for the hurt they've caused they just keep repeating this destructive cycle throughout life.

"One of the questions that is supposed to be asked of a would-be HPD is "do you think you would make a good actor/actress?" So what are these people implying? That anyone with a career in the performing arts is crazy? Please."

Its just one of many questions. An HPD I've talked to recently told me that ever since she was young she had this desire inside of her to perform to get attention. See it wasn't her love of acting that drove her to act. It was the attention seeking of acting that drove her to act. Thats what seperates the HPD from someone that truly loves to act. A true actor loves it not only because of the attention but moreso the perfection and satisfaction they get from fully becoming their character and then being appreciated for their fine work. An HPD becoming a character is only a means to an end. The end being to get all that attention.

"I also wish they'd define what "appropriate" in relationships? Who can tell someone else that, not knowing them. If a person for example was against interracial marriage...would they label someone who married outside their race as "pathological?"

No, we'd label the person who was against interracial marriage a racist bigoted idiot.

Also I think society's view on whats appropriate for relationships is loving and being good to eachother not lying, cheating, and manipulating to get what you want which is what HPD's do which seperates them from the normal dramatic personality type that genuinely cares about other people's rights and feelings and doesn't abuse either of those.

See as for myself I don't look down on a woman that sleeps with 20 guys. I look down on a woman or a man for that matter who sleeps with that amount of people but has told one of them that they are in a real relationship together and that HPD man or woman has said "I love you. I'll never cheat on you" and goes and does this.

That is when an HPD or any person for that matter crosses over into being a terrible human being.

The personality disorder itself doesn't make an HPD evil. Its the fact that they know they shouldn't be doing such things to people but do them anyway that makes them evil. If an HPD decides not to do any of this stuff ie manipulate, lie or cheat on their partner and just deals with their depression and anxiety in other ways then they are not an evil person in my view.

Psychiatrists say that the personality disorders are no excuse for a person afflicted's behaviour towards others. They are not insane.

Just like an ASPD should be held responsible and be imprisoned for raping a child or killing a person an HPD should be held responsible for the hurt and pain they cause others because they are fully able to prevent the pain they cause from coming about.

"I'm not saying HPD doesn't exist...but I AM saying that some of descriptions may be based more on "impressions" than on facts...or just plain mysogny...since the majority of people labeled as HPD are women."

Men do get diagnosed as HPD too and I understand your mysoginy claim but I can't really blame the researchers for that as this disorder in men and women takes the form of the stereotypical manipulative whore of a woman for lack of a better term. Its interesting that the men who are diagnosed with HPD often act like that female whore stereotype as well so I think that adds more credibility to it being a real disorder rather than just a fake one made up to insult some women. Anyway just so you know most of the men who develop personality disorders either become ASPD's also known as psychopaths or malignant narcissists also known as NPD.

"I'm sure some of you will say I am HPD in denial, but go ahead and say it all you want. Just cuz you say it doesn't make it true."

Uh yeah. We don't have much information on you so we can't even make much of a guess as to if you have this or not so chill Jules.

You aren't the only one wondering about gender bias, cite from the wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality_disorder#History_of_the_DSM-IV_diagnosis
"The extent to which the definition of Histrionic Personality Disorder currently reflects gender bias remains the subject of a controversy"