They make you go insane

They completely change you. They make you go crazy. You start doubting whether you are a normal person. They rob you of your innocence. They corrupt your value system.

I am unable to see people in the same way as I used to before. I see things differently now, more cynically.

I wish I'd never met this HPD person who succeeded in inflicting immense damage on me. I wish she'd been run over by a big van the day before I first saw her. I don't know how to get my innocence back, and I don't how to end it all, how to purify my mind.

Yeah they really get inside your head and don't leave it for quite a while if ever no matter what you do...

So are you a new poster or one of the regs here just too lazy to sign in?

Even though she's inside my head, it still feels much better to know that she has HPD.

She's made you and me regular posters on psychforums.... geezz.... i never thought i'd be posting on a nutforum....

"Guest"

On behalf of the "nuts" I am not so sure I care for that comment.

After all, it's OK if black people call each other "n", but for a white person to do it is not cool.

You might not be "nuts", but you do seem to be lacking in some key social grace or three.

W

You seem to have a problem with people speaking their minds on this forum.

"Nut" is not in the same category as "n*****".

Everything I have read on this blog has been a big help to me.I have done countless hours of research which has eased the pain knowing what the heck was happening to me. But it is this blogg that has got soul! To hear from the people is very comforting.I have decided to use this experience in my life (or should I say this experience has made me a student of the human condition. I have experienced unparralled growth during this time. I also have discovered some things about myself through this that would not have other wise surfaced.Matter of fact some pretty heavy things.Ya by the way guys why are you drawn to such needy deeply troubled women.The answer may suprise you but only look if your willing to face some potentially painful things about yourself. I refuse to hate anyone even if sometimes the hpd in my life certainly seems deserving.Hate is Love not realized why not Love .Hate will only harm yourself. Show compassion it is very sad to me that hpds are no more than a hollow shell.Yet another reason to Love all of mankind you sure cant judge from mere looks alone Love the person the soul . If you were an alcoholic you would?

Guest,

I don't know if you can determine from your own experience if it doesn't feel too bad to be called nuts. I agree that the other n word would seem to be stronger and not an even match, but, the example is still valid at some level.

Let's try this one. My wife who totally hates any sort of victim like behavior, or living in shame or blame, and not dealing with your problem had to come out and tell me that the 12 days I spent in Boston's leading cardiology hospital in Feb/Mar of 2005 recovering from open heart surgery I was being treated differently and poorly because I am bipolar. It doesn't matter that I was and am a highly paid professional with 7 direct reports, or a lot of other stuff. I was just seen as a "mental case", and wasn't even accorded the respect to report my conditions (very accurate and dire as it turned out) or views simply because of my condition, not any behavior that I demonstrated at the hospital (trouble sleeping was it). Even w/o any documented issues with the staff, I was not allowed to check myself out, my wife had to do it.

Have you ever had to face something like that? If so, then I expect throwing around the word "nut" might not be so easy for you.

You may feel free to say what you want, and I will remain free to point out what seems to me to be harmful, insulting, self serving, etc. behavior when it may denigrate the people of this forum.

Let's put it like this. Do you go around calling people with drinking problems "DRUNKS!"....?

Take care,
W

" by the way guys why are you drawn to such needy deeply troubled women.The answer may suprise you but only look if your willing to face some potentially painful things about yourself"

The question as to why men are attracted to women with HPD is an interesting one. There certainly appears to be a "type of man" who is attracted to these women.
For my part, it was the mixture of vivacity, her loveable funny way of carrying on, sexiness and childlikeness, together with her vulnerability, confusion, and generally her manifest need to have a man in her life to look after her that made me fall in love.

The problem of attraction to hpds is much deeper than superficial attributes. If there is any obsesiveness in your relationship look deeper if you dare. Check out obessive love disorder and its root causes. This is not for the faint of heart but if your willing to be objective " the truth shall set you free"

The type of man who is attracted to women like us?

Intelligent (enjoys the complexity of the relationship). Compassionate (able to give). Kind. Funny. Good-looking. Has a wild streak of his own (sympathetic to ours). Profoundly loyal. Ecletic tastes. Competitive. Usually a high achievere, somewhat driven.

Not all bad.

(So, did I get it right?)