Mother definitely has GAD

Honestly, its been driving me nuts for a VERY long time.

She exhibits all the symptoms. Constantly thinking the worst is going to happen, always worrying, even about the smallest things.
When she vocalizes it, it isn't the least bit productive. There will be times she vents her worry and I tell her what I'm going to do and I reassure her...but it always goes back. After the 3rd time I can't help but to get angry...I'm like "mom! We've talked about this 3 times now. I told you..."

What comes out of her is very destructive to me. Telling me I'm destined to fail at whatever the topic, that I won't try, talking to me like I don't know anything and being very belittling, etc.

She stresses the sh-t out of me.

It's even more detrimental as I have the problems of borderline personality disorder. My life is already hard as is.

I wanted to get advice from somebody well versed in this. I'm fairly well versed with BPD and such but I don't know how to handle my mom and I don't want her to keep being like this as its detrimental to me and I've grown to devaluate her and my father over the years.

I am very familiar with these types of invasive thoughts (though they are normally self-inflicted and don't reach outside of me). What she's trying to do (it seems) is prepare you for the worst possible outcome, maybe she feels if you aren't prepared you'll fall flat on your face (my dad is a little like this, though he doesn't have anxiety). Sadly, unless she's trying medication or therepy, the only thing you can do is reassure her that you are taking those steps to be prepared and try not to trigger her into a rant by making it seem (even in the smallest way) that you've left something out. It is a walking on egg-shells process, and I think, if you mention that her behavior is destructive to herself and her family that maybe she'll get help. Therepy and (sometimes) medication are imperative to stopping these invasive thoughts and inflicting them on those around you.
-Good luck

Kiyoki wrote:I am very familiar with these types of invasive thoughts (though they are normally self-inflicted and don't reach outside of me). What she's trying to do (it seems) is prepare you for the worst possible outcome, maybe she feels if you aren't prepared you'll fall flat on your face (my dad is a little like this, though he doesn't have anxiety). Sadly, unless she's trying medication or therepy, the only thing you can do is reassure her that you are taking those steps to be prepared and try not to trigger her into a rant by making it seem (even in the smallest way) that you've left something out. It is a walking on egg-shells process, and I think, if you mention that her behavior is destructive to herself and her family that maybe she'll get help. Therepy and (sometimes) medication are imperative to stopping these invasive thoughts and inflicting them on those around you.
-Good luck

It isn't like that though. It's a non-productive dump where she becomes very abusive in telling me how worthless I am, also low blows come into play, talking about things like my ex girlfriends which just messes me up.

As I said I am dealing with borderline tendencies myself and the walking on eggshells is something difficult for me to do with others, when others already seem to have to with me

CBear wrote:It isn't like that though. It's a non-productive dump where she becomes very abusive in telling me how worthless I am, also low blows come into play, talking about things like my ex girlfriends which just messes me up.

As I said I am dealing with borderline tendencies myself and the walking on eggshells is something difficult for me to do with others, when others already seem to have to with me

If she is calling you worthless in a triggering way this does not sound like anxiety. It could be something else I'm sorry, but maybe check into other PDs and disordered behaviors, but if she is just regularly dumping abuse on you it doesn't seem like anxiety is the root of it.