Please read!

I have just recently been experiencing what I believe is GAD and I have gone to a therapist once to date and I was just curious as to if anyone else has ever felt this way too. I will explain.

About few months ago, i started having these weird, random thoughts and they started to drive me nuts. I kept thinking negativley (I have always been a negative person but this was much different). I would think all different things to growing up and never having a family to asking myself why someone was a murderer (poor choice of word) or a "bad" person (another poor choice of word) and I wasn't. I was reading an article about a man in the USA who lived a perfectly "normal" life, with children a job etc.... and no one new but he had really been a serious serial killer. i would think.........can that be me too? Although I have NOTHING to back that thought up with and could never ever hurt a fly, it scares the crap out of me.
That is not all, there have been all different thoughts. My boyfriend and I have a great relationship and I am very happy with all that is happening in my life, but I am in constant fear that he is going to break up with me, or leave me. It is thoughts of a negative future that goes through my head and I have gotten so used to feeling like this that from the moment I wake up it starts and I wonder what today's annoying thoughts are going to be. For awhile I was afraid to speak about it, because I thought they would put me in a hospital or jail or something. But after reading these forums, I am hoping (well I don't really HOPE that someone else has to go through this but I understand that there are others who feel negatively about all different things) someone...anyone can write me back and tell me if this all sounds familiar. Also I might mention, anxiety runs through my family, from my aunts and uncles to my mother and father.

Please let me know if this is all "normal"

THANKS[/quote]

Hi, I'm new here and I'm pretty sure what you are experiencing are normal symptoms of GAD. I worry all the time, about anything I can.

I can relate to worrying about your boyfriend leaving you. I get those thoughts all the time, even though rationally there is no reason that he would leave me.

I hope you get help for your GAD, as I am not brave enough to go talk to someone about this yet.

Please go and talk to someone. That is how I started to feel better! If you bottle it up it will drive you crazy (not literally) or if you try to talk to someone who doesn't understand. I am telling you, talking to a professional or even others who are experiencing the same thing makes things alot easier!

MLG123 wrote:I have just recently been experiencing what I believe is GAD and I have gone to a therapist once to date and I was just curious as to if anyone else has ever felt this way too. I will explain.

About few months ago, i started having these weird, random thoughts and they started to drive me nuts. I kept thinking negativley (I have always been a negative person but this was much different). I would think all different things to growing up and never having a family to asking myself why someone was a murderer (poor choice of word) or a "bad" person (another poor choice of word) and I wasn't. I was reading an article about a man in the USA who lived a perfectly "normal" life, with children a job etc.... and no one new but he had really been a serious serial killer. i would think.........can that be me too? Although I have NOTHING to back that thought up with and could never ever hurt a fly, it scares the crap out of me.
That is not all, there have been all different thoughts. My boyfriend and I have a great relationship and I am very happy with all that is happening in my life, but I am in constant fear that he is going to break up with me, or leave me. It is thoughts of a negative future that goes through my head and I have gotten so used to feeling like this that from the moment I wake up it starts and I wonder what today's annoying thoughts are going to be. For awhile I was afraid to speak about it, because I thought they would put me in a hospital or jail or something. But after reading these forums, I am hoping (well I don't really HOPE that someone else has to go through this but I understand that there are others who feel negatively about all different things) someone...anyone can write me back and tell me if this all sounds familiar. Also I might mention, anxiety runs through my family, from my aunts and uncles to my mother and father.

Please let me know if this is all "normal"

THANKS

[/quote]

Hi i have very dodgy thinking too , i will explain a abit,
I started having anxiety when i started to smoke skunk and take pills when i was 14-16 years of age , i had really bad tummy and i dint no why and i was thinking maybe the pills have made me ill or iv done something to my self really bad so i kept smoking skunk so i could eat because i put food near my mouth i would be sick, So i carry on then it got even worse and so i left all my old friend and dint smoke anymore , i dint eat for 6-7 days i was down the hospital 3 out of them days they was trying to find out what was wrong with me and in the end they said i had the normal anxiety so they gave me some pills but i cant take pills as im scared of them, so i had 2 put them in boiling hot water to make it drink able for my self i had these pills for say 2 weeks so i was able to eat again, the drug people came to be saying i need to go to a counciler to change my way of thinking so i was thinking i should be able to get over this , i went there was ok the first two weeks after that every time i went i was not beliving what she was saying to me and after about 6-7 week we finshed i dnt think it helped me at all i think about dying all the time i wish i would die or sort this out because having GAD is a right pain i cant do anything i can be happy it hurts i cant be sad hurt i cant think about anything and one time i was thinking when i was washing up i bet it would be bad beening gay and stuff andthe next day i was thinking i was gay and it scared me loads and some times i wake up like i hate my mum and stuff it would be ok i no these are props normal but with the pain its very hard because i try and be happy but im always depressed all the time and cba wid life and that i would not end it or nuttin but i think there something wrong in my head needs sorting out

Best Regards Steven

steven

thanks for the reply. i had the same thoughts too.....so that makes me feel better and i hope you feel better too knowing your not alone. now i have the fear that i am one of those ppl with disorders tht live a normal life but end up being murders or molesters and it freaks me out. like i KNOW i am not, i have never done anything to PROVE that i am, but i think what if one day it is going to happen. i tell my mom and she is like oh well your are normal, but that is my point, it is NOT normal to have these thoughts therefore i am not NORMAL!! and it is like a cycle and seriously i feel like it is not worth living ( but the thought of dealth SCARES me so i do not feel like i am suicidal) and that really i am a bad person that shouldn't be here.

I also have these thoughts that my boyfriend is going to turn out to be a bad person too. Like a murderer. Once again, he has NEVER done anything to me or anyone else, but i fear that he will be and that is another thing that drives me nuts. Then I think that I don't even want to be with him and i don't want to be intimate with him, but really i do but i think i don't, so i don't and it hurts him. I am so mean and negative towards everything he says and does. He knows I have this problem and that I am going to get help, but is it working? I mean these thoughts are still coming. I am scared to tell my doc everything about murders and stuff b/c i am scared she is going to put me in the hospiutal where I shouldn't be. Do you follow? I am sorry. I am kinda just writing whatever is coming to my head. Hope I am not being too repetative.

I feel the same way, have those random crazy thoughts and i hate them and it really does freak me out. One minute you think one thing then the next the complete opposite. Yall are not alone in that, and i am glad that im not either. you can e-mail me at TmillerV@yahoo.com to talk more. I think it helps knowign your not alone.

GAD is caused by the imbalance of the brain chemical SEROTONIN. Your brain does not use it properly (this is something you were most likely born with) leading to feelings of anxiousness and worry.

The trouble is most drugs they give to help this situation are for full blown depression and have strong side effects. The SSRI anti depressents such as Paxil, Zoloft and Prozac all have side effects ranging from killing your sex drive and ability to reach orgasm to weight gain and intense sleepiness. If you are severely depressed these side effects are tolerable but if you have GAD and are prone to extreme worry, these drugs may be helpful but at a high cost of unwanted side effects. The drug Buspirone (BUSPAR) has been said to work on GAD without many of the wrost side effects but I have been unable to find much info on this.

Although GAD can lead to depression, alcoholism, drug abuse, sexual dysfunctions etc. for most people it is "Depression Lite" and should be treated with a delicate approach.

If you are looking to get help for your GAD try therapy if you can afford it first. If your doctor suggests a prescription then start with
a drug that won't have harsh side effects or a very low dose of those that do. If you find that keeping busy helps your GAD and you just suffer the worst of it during quiet times when you are thinking alone, or perhaps you get the odd anxiety attack, then Valium works well and it is fast acting. You have to be very careful not to take it every day as it can become habit forming and is hard to wean off.

You know what? I think having GAD actually helps you see the world as it really is which can be very worrying indeed. Everyone else...the so-called "normal" people are really walking around in a sort of fog. This fog was created by mother nature so the world around us doesn't cause everyone to wring their hands in despair and be totally incapacitated by life (and death) itself.

And then there's religion...a man made fog inducing sheild against reality...but hey, if your into it and have GAD, it works pretty well.