Anxiety Issues (and more) stemming from klonopin withdrawals

OK folks, before you read this, understand that I was never addicted to Klonopin, and I thought (like most of you, I'm sure) that withdrawals never were a big deal for me. I might have gone overboard with coffee or soda for a few weeks and gotten those caffeine headaches, but honestly I kept most things in check and never had a problem with any drug I've ever used, whether it be recreational use or only a few times. This was before I stopped using Klonopin...

I have been prescribed Klonopin for at least 3 years now (I've honestly lost track). Started at .5mg/day as needed, 30 a month. Now I'm on 1mg 60/month, prescribed for generalized anxiety disorder and some bouts of depression. Over the years, I used them on and off, a few days in a row at best, and sometimes went weeks and months without needing them. I normally sold them to friends or gave them away at parties, and I never ever had problems with this drug and addiction. They would help to relieve the occasional panic attack, with a lack of sleep, or just to make me feel better when I thought I needed it, and thats as far as it went. A couple here, one there, nothing 'excessive'. I've always had hundreds of them, and still never really got crazy with taking them.

This was all up until about 2 months ago. Some stuff happened, and I ended up bumping up my K-pin usage to 2/day, sometimes more (every day). I got up to 5-6/day (I took it for about 30 days straight), and then after it got kinda bad and I couldn't sleep after 6mg and a couple beers, I stopped taking it (cold turkey *yikes*).

I am now going through some of the worst anxiety attacks, panic disorder symptoms, depression symptoms, bipolar symptoms, GAD symptoms, social anxiety disorder symptoms, OCD symptoms, etc. that I've ever experienced in my life. Some days I am confused, awkward, lacking motivation, lacking self-confidence, socially avoidant, short of breath, rapid heartbeat / palpatations, suicidal thoughts, depression, thoughts are rampant and sort of random, easily losing train of thought, panic attacks, unable to have conversations with people, extreme frustration, extreme agitation and irritability, headaches, tightness of chest, muscle soreness sometimes tightness, extreme twitching especially in the face and especially when im having an anxiety attack, dizziness upon standing, sometimes extreme dizziness for 10-30seconds and almost blacking out, lots of loss of coordination, a form of anemia or related (if I haven't eaten I get very dizzy and also start to have a mild panic attack), disequilibrium (thought pattern/moods change without reason), plus more that I can't think of. I am a complete mess and am hating life right now. It's like the worst hangover times 100 that is lasting for weeks...

I never had any problems with it before, or with anything else (I've been prescribed to adderall for many years, for example, and have put a cessation on usage many times with no adverse effects) but I will say that Klonopin has given me some problems now. I didn't even realize it at first after quitting it, I thought I was just going crazy (since I never had issues before), but after giving it some thought as to what happened and some googling, I have determined it was due to the Klonopin. I started taking some Geranamine (1,3 dimethylamylamine, one of the active ingredients in Jack3d) for weight loss a couple weeks ago, and this agitated my social anxiety immensely so I quit. I am just now today becoming slightly normal again, at least temporarily.

I just want to let anyone who is currently taking benzos, or any other drug for that matter, to just be careful. I am almost always good about being self-aware and keeping a good watch on what I'm taking. I am now completely stopping the klonopin, and am finally having an okay time after about a month or so of not 'being all here', and I'm sure there will be more bad days coming up.

Just take heed, I know everyone thinks they are invincible, or at least that they are okay doing what they are doing. Sometimes it can be too much... was for me.

Went to see the doc on wednesday, and got put on celexa again.

We'll see what happens. Wednesday Thursday and Friday were okay days in terms of panic attacks, better than the previous week or two.

Edit: Also, most of my cognitive side effects such as confusion, slow thinking, easily losing my train of thought, etc. have all greatly diminished or completely vanished. Pretty much all that I am experiencing now are the respiratory/heart problems (palpitations, very rapid heartbeat, etc) and anxiety-related things like the panic disorder. That has also gotten better...