How are you feeling today?

I'm thinking to ask for the job offer that I turned down a month ago. But, i'm afraid that I'm too hasty again. I need a job, but I don't think that the opportunity is great. Thus, this is the holiday season, so it's understandable if there is no reply from my applications at better companies. But, I'm scared that it would be rejections again.

I am lonely. I feel often in the way. I hide away from people often in many settings. I don't realize how prevalent it is in my life. I have heightened sensitivity to sound and smells, this contribtes to my choice to hide. My family has had trouble being authentically inviting and loving to me my whole life.

I will reach out to others I feel welcome around.

S.

Today, I'm almost at peace. I spent the whole day at home.

i am well today, actually. except tht im quite tired. i hope everyone else is well too.

Anxious, of course. Extremely so, very much so, very very much so. It is what it is.

Im super anxious right now but also very proud of myself.

We made 3 phone calls, left 1 message, and even though we couldn't answer the phone when they called back (my partner did) we managed to set up a doctor's appointment and have a few questions answered by the local clinic.

I know this is a silly thing to be excited about but with all our anxiety "issues" and a key one being fear of the phone and intense anxiety and panic that goes with it.

Hope everyone is doing okay, remember to celebrate the little victories

I can talk on the phone with strangers, but I really don't like it much.

One person's silly, Is another's huge thing. When it's a source of anxiety, it feels like a mountain.

I feel like I'm not a real person, I'm just a collection of other peoples ideas of me.

Most of the time I think I'm fine now, but every so often things happen that make me realise I am just happy in a safe routine, then when I have to do something out of the ordinary or someone that is usually there can't be for some reason I'm reminded that the me I thought I was isn't actually a real person. Or IS that the real me and this anxious me is the fake person.

Sounds almost disassociative?

I was anxious on my day off. My only day off this week. It was ruined because of a coworker.