Unsure... GAD? OCD? Pure-O?

Good morning!

I am a tad confused.

I know for a fact that I have anxiety. I have panic attacks and if not medicated, get to a point where I can't drive alone, be alone, or do anything alone. But I love to be around people. I know that is not your normal, because most don't want to be in a social situation. I think it is because being around others distracts me from what is going on in my brain, which leads me to believe even more than it's just my brain messing with me.

Anyways. I was never really diagnosed with OCD. I just recently started doing research on this and have self-diagnosed. My psych I was seeing was amazing. He was very helpful, informational, supportive, he listened, and he was completely on-board with me weening off of my meds and trying to get me into CBT more often. I loved that. Finally, someone who isn't just trying to pacify me with meds! And then he suddenly passed away from a stroke. Now the new psych they have at the office is a complete med pusher. He even tried to say that I was bi-polar and I disagreed and then he tried to SCARE me into thinking that it would hit when I was in my early thirties. I was livid. Stupid man.

I get upset because, although we are dealing with a lot of things, we still know our body better than anyone else. So. I am just confused. I have anxiety, and I have intrusive thoughts, and its weird because sometimes I have thoughts about being dead just to relieve the constant thoughts, but then my anxiety kicks in and classic anxiety I freak over the thought of dying. LOL.

I really hope that I am not the only one who goes through this wonderfully annoying cycle. I am currently taking Lexapro, which I know helps with my anxiety and OCD. But because I stopped it cold turkey earlier this year, I feel like it isn't working as well now. (Yet it took a couple of years before I felt "normal" the last time) I have only been back on it for about 2 months, so I am sure it just needs more time. Hope everyone can find help in their own way. I am going to try the Lexapro for awhile longer, and looking for a new psych. But I will also research more natural therapies.

Hi there

Anxiety affects all of us differently- exactly what it feels like, and what triggers it. So the social side of things might not be a trigger for you- it might be something else. A particular situation, dealing with a particular person, or maybe a specific fear.

I'm sorry to hear that you lost your psych and you now have to deal with someone not as good. I had a bipolar diagnosis given to me at one stage too, and I knew that it just really wasn't right. I read about it and said that's really not me. So you're not the only one (the psych really didn't know me at all and I only saw him once).

I don't think you're alone in going through that cycle. With the meds, I know from past experience that sometimes they can take up to three months to be fully effective. Perhaps giving things a bit longer is the way to go. Really hope that it slows things down for you though. The constant anxious thoughts can be really tiring and hard to switch off. And I wish you the best in finding a new psych.

Take care
Lily