I don't think I'm afraid, but...

In the past, I've always lived as an actor, in general social contexts, and especially among family. I grew up not really communicating with my mother and even less with my father, and instead just acting in accordance with their expectations, to the point that there's now a real duality between who I actually am and who they know me as.

Now, I have made the hard decision that I want to go through with becoming a woman on the outside. My biggest difficulty here is how to tell my family and extended family, who would not expect it of me in the least, and would probably think I was joking for a while.

Honestly, I would just prefer not to mention it because this issue is enough drama even if it just stays in my head. Nor would I really mind losing contact with my family personally, I guess I would just feel guilty running away from them when they don't want me to go. It's easier to do with other people but somehow with my family I feel bad, like I owe them my presence or something.

So I don't think I can hide it from them forever. Eventually I'm going to have to tell them about my transition.

How do I even approach that? How do I get people to take me seriously? They're very Christian. They're judgmental. And they wouldn't expect it of me to begin with. Is a letter too indirect? I think I might be anxious in person...

Hi, vertices! If you think they will judge you and they won't be able to understand, you could concentrate on yourself and your transition and future. Maybe you could have some therapy too, since it might help especially if your family won't be there for support. When you feel self confident enough and comfortable in your own skin, you can simply let them know who you are and what you need for yourself and that you don't appreciate their attitude. There is no rush.
My issue is different but I know what it's like to have your family reject, judge or even abuse you verbally and emotionally for something that is not your fault.

It is probably true to say that you will never be completely happy until you can feel comfortable in your own body. As such, you should ideally work towards your dream of being a girl. I know that the path is very long to get there, but if you can have the drive/determination to get there, then it won't seem all that long. There are many people who had made the transition from one sex to another, and then their lives suddenly picked up. the first step, however, is to go to a doctor to get assessed. Ideally, you should also make your mother, father, or a close sibling of what is in your mind. Going it alone will be hard.

Take care,
Kevin

Jennywocky's footsteps:

http://www.youtube.com/user/Jennywocky

http://www.susans.org/forums/index.php?topic=68831.0

Hope these can help.