why cant i stop??

I see four posts prior one I made three years ago and said again WTF am I doing. Insanity is doing the same stuff and looking for a different solution. Very scary.

I really need to stop gambling. I am getting deeper and deeper into debt. I cannot seem to get that fire to quit. I want to, I need to, yet I keep going back; like a glutton for punishment. Even if I win, I lose it all later that day or the next day plus more, or overdrawing my account. A couple years ago, I had this fire to quit, I meet with a counselor for gambling addiction, I ended quitting for almost a year, 3 days short of it I thought I had it under control and thought, why not try a 20. Here I am years later still losing, so clearly I didnt have it under control and I definitely do not now. Why, where is that urgency like before to quit. Why was it so much easier then. I cannot live like this. I am constantly broke, robbing Peter to pay Paul scenario, except, I am at a point I may be robbing Peter, but Paul has to wait.

Welcome back Needtostop,

Many say that people need to hit rock-bottom before they decide to quit, but I have seem many instances where that isn't the case. I think for those who aren't at the bottom and are in the cycle of gambling, it very hard to find the motivation to quit. I think the best way to break that cycle is to put in lots of effort (self-exclusion, GA meetings, therapy, daily blogging). The more effort you put in, the less you'll want to gamble because you don't want all that effort to go to waste. Of course this is easily said than done. I think that if I tried this when I was in the cycle, I MIGHT have been able to quit. I ended going through the rock-bottom route

I am a very determined person, I feel the need to control everything. But this dang addiction is one that I clearly am not in control over. I did make it home tonight after work, not without urges. So I know this fight will be a battle. But I did gamble at lunch time. I will start a new day tomorrow and fight it. Thanks for replying. I dont know how much more rock bottom it can get. Well yes I do. But I feel like I'm staring at it. Especially when I lose a lot, I am so mean to myself. But I feel like I deserve it. Im hoping this forum will be my help!