I gamble daily

It started as just a everyone and then thing. I quit using cocaine and crystal cold turkey and took up gambling in order to deal with my urges. For some reason it feels more difficult to quit this then it was the drugs and partying. Everyday I think about it and everyday there’s a struggle. I tell myself I’ve been through worse, which is true but it’s still lingering. I hear slot machine in my head before I fall asleep and I dream about gambling but I’m never winning in my dreams. Just losing everything including my family.

Welcome Dandyandy1221 ,

Dandyandy1221 wrote:I’m never winning in my dreams. Just losing everything including my family.

That scenario doesn't just confine itself to our dreams . It's very likely to play out in real life , if it hasn't already . I was actively addicted to slot machines for 7 years and have been in recovery for over 4 years now . I think the reason it feels harder than quitting drugs is basically accessibility . You have to go out and find drugs . Money is likely to be in your pocket all the time .

There's no risk involved with carrying money around , there's no chance of a physical overdose of gambling . It's legal , so we consider it a socially acceptable form of entertainment . But for a lot of us , it is a drug addiction . It's simply that the drugs are being manufactured in our own brains . I was hooked on the dopamine and the adrenaline rush . Slot machines especially are designed to deliver those "hits" in abnormally high doses . I was swamping my brain with feel-good chemicals until those levels become my new normal . Nothing less than that made me happy . It was about 4-5 months after I quit before I could find enjoyment in ordinary things . It took that long for my brain chemical levels to normalize .

Gambling dreams are common in the beginning of recovery , as are near constant thoughts and urges . This addiction doesn't give up without a fight . There is some good advice in our Strategies thread at the top of the page . You should check it out .