Dream World vs. the Real World

One thing that all the psychologists, GA and therapists agree about is that compulsive gamblers all have a "Dream World." It's either that they will obtain the big win or their system or gambling ability will enable them to consistently win. The big win is the dream of a lot of gamblers where they can solve all their financial problems and live a life of luxury or a well off life. As the GA book says, "Pathetically, however, there never seems to be a big enough winning to make even the smallest dream come true. When compulsive gamblers succeed, they gamble to dream still greater dreams. When failing, they gamble in reckless desperation and the depths of their misery are fathomless as their dream world comes crashing down. Sadly, they will struggle back, dream more dreams, and of course suffer more misery."

Nevertheless, the real world can NEVER compete against the Dream World. The real world doesn't offer all those fantasies. It really just offers peace of mind, and stability and better relationships. That is why compulsive gamblers should not let their mind go into the Dream World as the Dream World seems to always come on top.

Good topic.

We often skip the "dream world" reading in GA -- much of it seems so out of date (fur coats etc.).

I guess I had a bit of a dream world when in action. In the beginning it afforded big shot syndrome treating friends to vegas / tahoe /etc. "free" gambling trips.

After my addiction took hold the dream simply became "more time gambling". I wanted to stay there, buy my way there, do whatever it took to be there AS LONG AS I COULD. To be in that disconnected space -- no time clock, no obligations, no problems, only me and the choice of where to go next to make my "play". My dream world actually became the floor space in the casino.

Casual friendships, good music, good treatment by hosts, comps, drinks, smokes, people watching and the thrill of all the simple emotions (which were dead outside of the casino) - anticipation, rush, let down, rush, highs and dives.

Wins might have paid a little in a bill, or got me out of a small jam, but I was after the fuel that allowed more time gambling.

I have mentioned before about how my dream world of gambling started, from when I was a kid watching TV shows like "Mr.Lucky", "Maverick", and movies depicting "heroic" gamblers who lived a life of glamour, never seemed to lose and seemed to have a great life. I fantasized early on about becoming a professional gambler like them and never need a job. Wow......talk about a dream world. The real world of gambling was obviously much different and harsh. I have had to work many jobs in my lifetime, and a lot of the earnings lost to gambling. Luckily, I did grow wiser with age, but I wish it would've been sooner.

Notlookingback wrote:One thing that all the psychologists, GA and therapists agree about is that compulsive gamblers all have a "Dream World."

True for me. The casino is my dream world.

Notlookingback wrote:The big win is the dream of a lot of gamblers where they can solve all their financial problems and live a life of luxury or a well off life.

This is where psychologists and therapists need to do better research. All the gamblers I know already have a luxurious life. They don't gamble to achieve a luxurious life, the gambling actually destroys their luxurious life. A lot of people in today's world are confused. They only think poor people gamble. The reality is rich people gamble too.

Notlookingback wrote:As the GA book says, "Pathetically, however, there never seems to be a big enough winning to make even the smallest dream come true. When compulsive gamblers succeed, they gamble to dream still greater dreams.

I would never take advice from some psychologists or therapist whose never been an addict themselves. The psychologists who write these GA books have lots of "theories and ideas" that are ignored, or even laughed at by the general public.

Notlookingback wrote:That is why compulsive gamblers should not let their mind go into the Dream World as the Dream World seems to always come on top.

Very true.