this may help

I was talking to a friend the other day about addictions. She put it so simply, but I found her words profound. She said that people engage in addictions "because they are sad about something."

I find that simple truth to really help me heal. It helps me contextualize the very strange, weird, self-destructive behavior -- casino gambling -- that I engaged in, for hours and hours at a time, over a period of years. I gambled because I was sad. Yes, in reality I was extremely sad about something. The rare times that I think about gambling now, are times when I am feeling very sad. For me to consciously be aware of this truth is a gift. It helps to non-judgmentally and gently, attend to my sadness, acknowledge it, instead of gambling. Acknowledging my emotions makes me stronger.

blue_green_lake wrote:attend to my sadness, acknowledge it, instead of gambling. Acknowledging my emotions makes me stronger.

I find it to be so true bgl, acknowledge our thoughts and emotions and let it pass. We do not have to act on it all the time, a thought is just a thought and it is not who we are.

I used to gamble when I am sad or happy, have lots of money or little, it does not matter as long as I am doing something. Now I know what gambling can do to us when we cross the line, there are so many things and experiences for us to enjoy out there and gambling only make our world smaller.

I remember watching a relatively young (maybe in his 30's) disabled person gambling at a table, sitting in a wheelchair. It was sad because he was gambling large amounts and losing, but it never seemed to bother him. I suspected he felt he didn't care about money because of his physical condition. For all the addicted gamblers out there, I'm sure there are a myriad of reasons why they are destroying their own lives....I've heard more than once some people, whether consciously or subconsciously want to punish themselves...........at some point it really becomes a form of self-destruction or suicide in a financial sense, IMHO.

rainbowcolor wrote: there are so many things and experiences for us to enjoy out there and gambling only make our world smaller.

I love that quote. Thank you! Yes, gambling does make our worlds smaller! And it diminishes us. I felt like I had to gamble to "be somebody." But I am already "somebody," flaws and all.

58gambling wrote:I remember watching a relatively young (maybe in his 30's) disabled person gambling at a table, sitting in a wheelchair. It was sad because he was gambling large amounts and losing, but it never seemed to bother him. I suspected he felt he didn't care about money because of his physical condition. For all the addicted gamblers out there, I'm sure there are a myriad of reasons why they are destroying their own lives....I've heard more than once some people, whether consciously or subconsciously want to punish themselves...........at some point it really becomes a form of self-destruction or suicide in a financial sense, IMHO.

We had a "regular" at the casino I used to go to as well, a young disabled person, at the blackjack tables. His attendant would place the bets for him and the young guy would direct the betting. He must have wanted to escape his life. I had to look inside and note that I was no different! Totally addicted. It was sad for all of us. Yes, it's a form of self-punishment, it seems. As the same time it renders us almost drunk or high with abandon, it hurts over all. It's a counterfeit high, really. There are better ones.