hey, everyone! I'm new here...

I started researching on my own how I can make a change and on pinterest someone suggested this. I've been a gambler for 19 years. I'm not sure how I have survived this long. Somehow I have always managed to get out of the slump, but I have had two bankruptcies, terrible credit, living paycheck to paycheck and yet I still manage to get myself into a deeper pit. If I'm away from the casino, I'm okay-dont have the urge to go, however, if someone invites me I get this feeling of happiness and I can't wait to get there. Once I do, I feel like I literally lose my mind. I've received loans in the past that have helped me, but I've borrowed without paying back and I'm feeling very low. How do I get back on my feet? there is a lot more but I don't want to bore you all with my story. I just don't know what else to do. Please help.

needtochange99 wrote:If I'm away from the casino, I'm okay-dont have the urge to go, however, if someone invites me I get this feeling of happiness and I can't wait to get there. Once I do, I feel like I literally lose my mind.

Needtochange99, I got this from another site and that was how I felt when I was deep in the rabbit hole, hope this is helpful for you too.

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i hear where you are coming from. To me it was fun, a fun time/setting.. That is until i lost , then it was replaced by feeling very down, and feeling like i was totally weak and could not control myself.

I had to take action and get help. Which was banning myself from the pokees Mentally i had and still have to think about which is worse, not having the fun/good time excitment feel...or the ..feeling like crap

and very down on myself.. It is turning out that not having a fun/good time excitement feeling ,,, is much better than heavy,weak, depressing state of mind. I don't consider myself as having been cured.

I consider myself having some control/ management of it..and that is a good feeling.
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Those are very wise words from Rainbowcolor .

My addiction had me convinced that if I stopped gambling , I would be needlessly denying myself something fun and good , some kind of relaxation that I deserved . The reality was , my gambling was none of those things . It was ruining me financially , stressing me out to the point of an ulcer and isolating me from the things and people I love . It turned me into sneak and a liar .

Ask a drug or alcohol addict why they use when they know it's killing them : They'll tell you that they love getting high and they hate the way they feel when they want to get high and they can't . This is addiction . It disguises a compulsion as something we "want" to do . It makes us believe we love doing it when actually , we hate the thought of not being able to do it .

That feeling of happiness ? It's the addiction , knowing that it will be fed soon . And once it starts , it's not going to stop until all the food ( i.e; your money ) is gone .

Thank you for your replies. You are both right. How though can I get from this pit I'm in? Right now I'm currently -$1.888 in my bank account and I don't get paid until Friday. Basically my entire check will have to go to the negative and I'll still be in the negative. I'm so worried that chase my close my account. I believe in God and listen to KLove (sorry for those who aren't religious/spiritual) and I feel like such a liar to God, like here he helps me time and time again and yet I manage to get myself deeper in debt and talk about feeling awful about myself. I want to change and need to change and I now know more than ever that I have an addiction. How though do I get passed this? how?

Very true words NewSunRising. I was same way, taut I would miss out on the excitment and fun if I stopped gambling and that gambling is great fun. Wen in reality its the total opposite.
Its just the addiction talking, trying to get us to gamble.
The lows and stress of sneaking around and losing all ur money is in noway worth it for the stort-term buzz ya get off a win which u will inevitably loss again.
Cus at the end of the day it desnt matter how you look at it, everyone on this forum has had big wins and all gamblers do but it doesnt matter ul never win gambling. You will always end up losing it all back sooner rather than later.
Whats kept me gamble free for nearly a year now is when I finally realzed that, it took me a few years but I finaaly got it into my head that gamblers never win and gambling wasnt making me happy but the complete opposite.
Goodluck in ur fight with gambling addiction.Anyone can be gamble free, they just need to change their mentality in how they tink of gambling in their life.

Removing gambling from our lives necessitates removing access to it first . Self-exclusion is a powerful weapon . Limiting our access to cash and credit cards is also vital .

The urge to gamble can be relentless - if you can go weeks without it , you already have a great advantage . The one thing that stopped me from getting into recovery was giving in to the urge when it got overwhelming . For me , it took a battle plan of possible distractions and sometimes just white-knuckling it through them until they began to fade in strength and frequency . I also threw every penny towards my debt and leaving myself with a bare minimum of cash until the next paycheck . No money=no gambling .

Stop going with your friends to the casino . If you don't feel comfortable telling them that you can't control your gambling and that you need to stop completely , use any excuse you can come up with . Your addiction reacts to the invitation the same way a dog reacts when you dangle a steak above its head . The best thing you can do is tell them flat out that you aren't gambling anymore so please don't ask you to go because it's a temptation that you don't need or want .

I told my former gambling buddies that it no longer interested me . If they wanted to meet for drinks or dinner or any other activity , that was fine . Unsurprisingly , I don't see them anymore . None of the people I have as friends today are gamblers .

It's a tactic of the addiction to make us believe that the problem is our debt , or our losing streaks . The real problem is that once we start , we cannot stop gambling , win or lose , until everything is gone . It's as if something alien takes control of our minds and bodies and only after every possible source of money has been depleted does it return us to self control and the horrible reality of what we have just done . I've been through that living nightmare countless times .

There's no magic bullet , no " One thing " you can do to stop this vicious cycle . It takes effort , time and a solid plan of distractions and roadblocks until the addiction begins to lose its grip on you . Just be aware that it will never stop trying to get it back . The addiction does not want to die .

GA is a huge source of support and strength . I highly recommend it for anyone who is struggling with gambling addiction . We will also help you get through this , any way we can . You're not alone in this battle .