Try something different - delay your gambling

I cope with the urge to gamble by telling myself I cannot gamble but maybe once or twice a year because forever seem too final. It seem to be helping and I am very happy with total abstinence for now, life is more simple and I am beginning to feel happy and content with the little things again. This is a big deal for me because when I was actively gambling, nothing is interesting unless I am in the casinos throwing away my money and wasting time. I even feel relieved when it was all gone from my wallet so that I could go home and sleep, how sick is that

Notlookingback wrote:
I have an old friend who is a gambler in Vegas. He told me that the prevailing theory in Vegas is that the shooter who killed all those people at that Festival motive was to kill Vegas, not necessarily the people at the Festival. The theory is that he probably believed he was a martyr and saving countless others from the torment and anguish he suffered as a gambler in Vegas.

Notlookingback, from all the reports I gathered about this killer, he often portray himself as a rich and successful gambler. He told his brother when he win big, what about the time when he lose big. I so agreed with you gambling is like cancer, if we don’t do something about it, it will just eat us up, little by little, financially, emotionally and physically.

For years I tried different gambling methods to ‘stay in control’
Most common one would be every pay weekend £100 on the football and £100 on online casino and walk away if I reached £500 - I actually stuck with this method for many months. Unlitmately though, I lost cruelly in one of my matches and I couldn’t the stomach the thought of waiting another month to bet again - so I said to myself, ‘ok, smaller amount every weekend’ ... eventually all went out the window and I was Gambling everyday.
Stopping all forms of gambling cold turkey for me personally is the only way.

housealwayswins wrote: Some people need to do it in steps and even if they get a moment's respite and peace that's better than getting none at all.

I can understand what you are saying here, trying to posit ways for some to get relief from the behavior in any way possible. I think that impediments to 24-hour gambling are really needed in society. I am so glad that when I tried online gambling when living in the US, they would not accept my payment. I think patronizing online casinos was against US law at that time. I could have easily gotten sucked in that vortex.

Gambling all night in brick and mortar casinos was very destructive to my economic situation, and even more so to my health, but it was still preferable to gambling online and that hellish existence. I self-excluded from the land-based casinos. Then I was playing VLT machines in bars and restaurants here. But that was preferable to casino gambling for my health, because those places closed at night. Any method that takes a person away from 24-hour access to gambling is preferable. Self-exclusion to casinos is important to do. The more a person spends with family and friends, and trying to focus on that rather than gambling, even if the person is giving themselves "permission" to say, gamble once a week, is better than no effort to quit. I don't think controlled gambling will be a solution, but impediments may be a way to catch a breath, to get some distance. I do think though that abstinence is what truly brings peace and transformation.

I've basically done this. I stop for a month, start back but only spending a small amount. Spend small amounts for a few weeks, a month etc... But sooner or later, it happens...you crash back in to full blown addiction. You start small, chase losses, ignore responsibilities and before you know it, you're behind on debts and gambling to try to catch up.

We wouldn't be compulsive gamblers if we could be in control. The thing is, we are here because we can't control our gambling.

I understand what the OP was saying...and in theory it may work for a select few...but for most of us, any gambling leads us right back to what brought us here in the first place.

I think that an element of 'realism' can sometimes be a solution for some, as the OP suggests. If you are going to gamble (and there's no doubt on that) then at least make it the least damaging. I know people will often escalate, and that's the danger, but that may happen in people who try to stop too (and possibly worse in those cases).
I have to admit, I'm not completely gamble-free but I do feel some control despite being a complete degenerate compulsive in some periods of my gambling life. I find fear of the worse times stops me these days - I remember the blackest holes I've been in through gambling, and that has stopped me dead in my gambling tracks at times. I'm not going back there.
I still have some gambling in my life and behaviour (shock horror, so do many). But, please consider whenever you are compelled to place any gamble, what it means for your life - that can be a great safety belt at times if you really consider it - even for those who 'still' gamble. Slow it all down, it helps.

housealwayswins

Even within help circles for alcoholics, drug addicts, other addicts, one can find may different approaches to getting well.

Like you and other responses -- getting some kind of break from the action perhaps gives a CHANCE for the brain to gain a sliver of rational thought. A full break is best, but without that any time away from gambling is preferred over full on action.

If I even contemplate a "little" gambling I remember the lie so well - played out so many many times. It is a 100% death spiral for me. Even if I could reign it in and go 1 x a month with limited amount of fuel ($) the mental obsession would take hold and it would take over my brain and my life. I'd be back in a short amount of time to full on destruction.

I KNOW w/ every cell I loved it too much. Even in recovery I still love it too much. I didn't care the harm I just wanted it to start, to continue, and for it to never end. Total mental obsession if I was not in the casino -- to get back to the casino.

For those looking for help, for possible solutions, for softer ways.... STAY close. Listen. Ask for help. and DO NOT LOSE HOPE. Your life CAN turn around. Mine has.