Today is my one-year anniversary!

Well, I made it a year and I don't have any urge to gamble. I can't say that I never had an urge over the last year but I know I don't have one now.

At one point I actually decided to go to Atlantic City and even went so far as to shower and get dressed to go but I was able to step back and consider what it would do to me. The main reason for my success is that I stopped making excuses and started going to weekly GA meetings.

I should mention that I attended one GA meeting around eleven years ago and didn't like it and never attended another one until a year ago. I thought the meeting was a waste of time (the reading really got to me, it seemed boring and a waste of time). I also thought that the other people in the room were losers and that I was better than them. So I immediately went back and gambled away pretty much everything I earned for the next ten years. I also believe that I wasn't really ready to quit.

Now, eleven years later, I am one of the mainstays of my group and have made some great friends by going to meetings. We meet up for dinner and drinks, we've gone golfing a couple times and I have friends that I can talk to about my problem. This has been extremely important in my recovery. I know that if I go back I will lose friends and I don't want that. I also know that if I relapse and come back to the room they'll rip into me with some tough love because they know that's what I need.

So, for you new people and those of you who are still struggling I would like to say: please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please find a meeting and start going. It might not seem right at first but in time you will become a welcomed part of the group. If you find that you're still not feeling comfortable you should find another group (even if that means driving a little farther). Remember, we would all gladly drive night and day to get to a casino so a little bit of a road trip should be no problem.

Lastly, if you can still come up with excuses to not attend meetings and are still relapsing every time you get some money then you're just lying to yourself about wanting to quit. If you really wanted to quit you'd find a way to spend 1-2 hours a week working on it when you'd gladly spend well over 10x that amount of time feeding slot machines or betting games, or at the tables.

I would be glad to help any of you with any questions or concerns you have about meetings. If you've been to one and didn't like it, let me know what it was you didn't like. If you felt uncomfortable, let me know what make you uncomfortable. I am going to be doing the same thing for our chapter in trying to help new members stick with the program and would appreciate your feedback (either good or bad).

Well done on the one-year anniversary! Enjoyed reading your post - gives me hope!

Gonna attend my first GA meeting on Monday evening and I'm very anxious, particularly as I have a massive fear of public speaking (by "public", I mean even a group of just a few people I don't know well). Do you think it will be acceptable for me to go along and simply listen? Also, I am moving soon and therefore will only be able to attend two meetings here before I go. Still worth going, though? Would appreciate some advice. And, once again - well done!! I bet you're a much stronger and wiser person now because of the positive choices you've learned to make - pardon the "bet" pun

Seeking Tranquility wrote:Well done on the one-year anniversary! Enjoyed reading your post - gives me hope!

Gonna attend my first GA meeting on Monday evening and I'm very anxious, particularly as I have a massive fear of public speaking (by "public", I mean even a group of just a few people I don't know well). Do you think it will be acceptable for me to go along and simply listen? Also, I am moving soon and therefore will only be able to attend two meetings here before I go. Still worth going, though? Would appreciate some advice. And, once again - well done!! I bet you're a much stronger and wiser person now because of the positive choices you've learned to make - pardon the "bet" pun

It is never a bad idea to go to a meeting so I'd say definitely go. You'll meet people who haven't gambled in years that still attend meetings. When I started I thought it was nuts to have over 15 years without a bet but still be attending meetings but logically it tells me that if they haven't gambled in that long and are still coming then the meetings must matter. As far as public speaking goes, I think it is fine to just introduce yourself. You'll get the drift of what to say (My name is ________ and I'm a compulsive gambler, my last bet was on ___________). You can then say that you don't want to share. You should realize that you are in a completely safe place and a judgement-free zone though. You can also talk to somebody after the meeting, just pick someone with over one year without gambling who maybe shared something that you related to or just someone you think seems like your kind of person. I actually meet up every week before our meeting for a couple beers and a bite to eat with a couple guys and we have a good time.

Also, I would recommend trying a couple different rooms early on. It will be good to attend multiple meetings a week in the beginning and it will also help you make an informed decision as to which room is right for you since there can be subtle differences. In one room I went to the people would give two dates, the date of their first meeting and the date of their last bet. I didn't like this at all as it seemed like a cop out. If your first meeting was five years ago but you've continued to gamble why does it matter when your first meeting was? This is serious business and quitting is what's important.

Good luck with your first meeting though. Don't be intimidated, don't think you're any worse or better than anybody else there. Don't worry about upsetting anybody, you are there for you and it's ok to be selfish when it comes to your recovery. Don't think that your story isn't helping others, new members' stories are always welcomed and really help older members to remember why they're there. And remember that GA rooms are lucky rooms and are really rooms for winners because every day we don't gamble we are literally winning.

Please come back on here and post your comments about your meeting. I'm always curious to get first-timers thoughts.

Cheers! That's been very helpful in allaying my fears. Will let you know how I get on.

Excellent! Very motivating to read. I just finished my 7 months

-- Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:06 am --

Excellent! Very motivating to read. I just finished my 7 months

Big congratulations on this achievement buster!

Congratulations on one year, it's refreshing to hear success stories! I have a little over 5 months clean.

StuckinNV wrote:Excellent! Very motivating to read. I just finished my 7 months

-- Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:06 am --

Excellent! Very motivating to read. I just finished my 7 months

I remember reading your posts a long time ago and really felt for you. It must be tough to be in NV with our problem but 7 months is one heck of an accomplishment!

-- Sat Dec 06, 2014 9:04 pm --

hardknocklife wrote:Congratulations on one year, it's refreshing to hear success stories! I have a little over 5 months clean.

Thank you and keep up the good work!

Well done Buster! Also congrats to NV and Never Enough!!!

buster1969 wrote:You'll meet people who haven't gambled in years that still attend meetings. When I started I thought it was nuts to have over 15 years without a bet but still be attending meetings but logically it tells me that if they haven't gambled in that long and are still coming then the meetings must matter.

I completely understand this, my longest spurt of 0 gambling was 3 years. 3 years is a long time without gambling, so I thought I was completely cured of this disease, I thought I beat the odds. One day I went to a casino with friends, we played and drank. I didn't think much of it, and I had a great time. I thought I can now be one of those recreational gamblers who just plays $40, once I lose my 40 I am done. I was so wrong, it only worked for a few casino trips. If you play with fire you will eventually get burned. The month after I went again, and then another trip the following month. Soon my trips became more frequent, I went weekly and I was hooked again. Instead of losing $40 like I planned my losses were anywhere from $500-$1200 every week. The addiction came right back full on it was like I had never quit the first place. It took me another 7 years as gambling addict & tens of thousand of dollars down the drain to finally again put it under control. It was extremely difficult to quit again, I tried so many things but couldn't stop, I had small victories of not gambling for a few months during the 7 years, but relapsed again and again. Somehow with all my wits I managed to stop again. This time around I will NEVER EVER EVER EVER let my guard down. I can never be cured, I will always be in recovery no matter how long I haven't gambled.

Congrats Buster on your 1 year!!!!