So I don't know if I have coprophilia

Hi everyone, just wanted to share a few thoughts about my possible new fetish which I discovered two years ago. And that is scat fetish, its strange, I feel repulsed by feces so much that I even gag, just like every person, I hate the smell and everything about poop.

But one day two years ago, I was hot and decided to try new things...and saw some scat porn and thought to myself "well I can try to smear poop in my dick to see what it feels like..." so I did that, and biggest regret of my life, I kinda like it. But not because the poop itself, but for the extremely dirty situation it was to have poop in my penis...I don't like the idea of eating it though.

The fact that I masturbated with poop made me trigger my mild OCD, I didn't even know I had OCD, just sometimes a disturbing thought get stuck on my head but just for a few minutes then goes away. But that event (poop masturbate) made my OCD the strongest in my entire life for about a month, this was the worst month in my entire life. But then I forgot about poop and fetishes and all that stuff and that cured my OCD.

The thing is I enjoy normal sex more than scat, I don't even like scat videos anymore, but today I did it again, to check if I feel aroused by my poo, and managed to achieve orgasm. But I don't know why, it didn't feel satisfying at all, it felt like it wasn't enjoyable, so this time I'm ok with my OCD. It may be an obsession rather than an attraction to poop? it's just the texture over my penis which somehow gives me some pleasure.

I hope you understand what I'm trying to say here, I'm not a native english speaker so this may sound weird to you.

TLDR: I don't know why I achieved orgasm with poop smearing over my penis, orgasm feels like empty, and I enjoy normal sex more. But the fact that I can have a scat fetish is killing my self steem and trigering my OCD.

Peace and love for you all.

yolojojo

The obsession theory makes sense. Or perhaps it is a purely sensual thing. And other substances with a similar texture might make you react the same? [That's worth trying. Since you could get the best of both worlds. If something neutral gets you off.] Or it might just be around the taboo of it. The sense of "being dirty."

Eating faeces doesn't have to be a part of coprophilia. It's fine to enjoy scat in other ways. There's nothing wrong with that. And no way to tell whether a person is into this or not. So it shouldn't need to hit your self esteem. We all like different things. Some of which other people would find deeply weird or "unnatural." And that's OK.

But given that it triggered OCD for you. I'd suggest that this is a fetish you avoid. And make an effort not to indulge if possible. No checking!