HPD friend officially "dumped" me

Hey everyone, I've recently been officially "dumped" by my ex best friend whom I think is histrionic. I wrote a thread over a year ago about her. Anyway, after she acted in a way towards me that I found to be unacceptable, I started seeing and talking to her less and less and yesterday she finally asked me what was going on and I only told her I had difficulty trusting her. She first blameshifted, played the victim and stuff like that. After that, she said it was her fault and that she didn't want to be friend anymore. I know no one is the same but what should I expect? Anyone in a similar situation? I know that she really hates to be rejected, so I suppose she rejected me before I could, but I just hope she won’t do the same things as she did over a year ago (talking behing my back for example). Furthermore, I know I'll have to see her again, albeit even less often, as we have mutual friends.

Yes, I've been through it. I had a longer post ready here, but per the forum guidelines, I will simply say:

Expect the worst in terms of gossip or whatever, but develop a lack of interest in it. Instead of concerning yourself with behaviors beyond your control, just focus on things that will brighten your expectations elsewhere. Don't worry about mutual friends or consider yourself accountable to them, and go about your business like you never knew the person with complete indifference (not the immature kind, but just cold neutrality no matter what) if you see them in person, then go elsewhere. It might hurt at first, but it gets easier until there's no challenge involved. Get new friends, too.

Congratulations.

You are free!

Yes, I agree, CONGRATULATIONS! I understand how the fear of unfair and unjust gossip can prevent you from doing what you need for yourself... but consider that a small price to pay, and a temporary one for the freedom you will have from all of the other negative aspects you've dealt with in the friendship.

Well I hoped I'd never have to speak to her again but guess what she has spoken to a friend of mine and asked questions about me. And I have received a text message from her asking me if i wanted to see her soon... I didn't answer. Why would she do this when she is the one who officially decided to end the relatioship? And I guess that I shouldn't even tell her i am not interested, I juste need to not answer anything?

Hi. A lot of water has now gone under the bridge,and if you feel that you have moved on and are better off without her in your life, then you may have to say no, you don't want to see her. If she is showing signs that she is willing to change, then do you feel that talking to her would give you a sense of closure? This is a situation in which you'd have to weigh up all the pros and cons and as to what it would mean if she became a part of your life again.

We now have a forum for the significant others and friends of disordered people, and you can now have the support of two forums. I will move your thread there, and leave a shadow thread here in HPD so that your thread can still be found here and read.

And I guess that I shouldn't even tell her i am not interested, I juste need to not answer anything?

Yes, if you are hoping to have her move on out of your life, if that's where it's at...
Personally, presumably like you and most others, I would rather make peace with someone, set things to rest, live and let live, and love, agape style. But this isn't always possible. Always remember that negative attention is attention, although most of us - HPDs and Nons alike - prefer positive attention. I think some HPDs will settle for 99% negative attention, especially if it culminates in some way in 1% positive attention...even if it means they must take on the role of the annoying pesky bad girl or boy, that insufferable so and so that's in your life. So if this is the unfortunate situation you find yourself in, no attention will be the surest way to get her or him to move on (and who knows, maybe they might even become self-aware and take a swing at recovery?)
Sometimes when everything is mulled over, sifted, and carefully considered, there is this undeniable moment that presents itself, that things are definitively over, and the best peace is achieved by moving along. Don't hesitate to seize that moment, if in fact that's where you and her are at.

As far as I know, she hasn't shown any will to change. Actually, I am pretty sure she doesn't want to change anythinng for real (she's always right...!)I guess it answers my question, that is i am better off not answering. If I answer that I don't want to see her, she'll say something to make me feel bad. She hasn't sent me any other text message yet and I hope it stays that way.

I don't care about the sense of closure anymore. 4 moths later and I feel much much better too.

I'm by no means an expert, but I've had a similar experience and I can offer some sympathy to you.
I was "dumped" about 7 months ago by an HPD friend. The good thing is that things ARE getting better.
From my experience time is the only thing that really helps.
Getting involved with other things and taking the focus off that person has helped too. Unfortunately I'm unable to completely avoid contact, but minimal contact seems best for me.
Be encouraged, if I can do it anybody can!
So hang in there, my friend, it will get better!

Bottom line, you rejected her and insulted her by saying you couldn't trust her-that can be very hurtful to hear from someone you are close to. She was just sparing herself further criticism from you. You both are better off without each other.

I wouldn't worry about the backstabbing though, people don't really take much stock in disputes between friends/ex friends.

If I don't trust someone close to me I'm just really careful of what I tell them and keep my distance if they want to drop me for it than its their decision.