financial abuse of grandma

my 91 year old grandma is being taken advantage of by her granddaughter who has power of attorney. she has been taking cash by check, ignoring bills , and sending mail to a different address. to obtain credit cards in grandmas name. i have been checking things out and found $34000.00 of credit card debt in my grandmas name. also the checking account is overdrawn every month because of the abuse. my grandma has no clue as to the situation and loves the granddaughter sooooo much. i know the real story and want to stop it. should i report it to the adult protection agency? we want the granddaughter out of grandmas business. i have tried to tell her and she refuses to believe it. just imagine the money she has taken since my grandad passed in 1993. i just recently learned of the abuse and i'm damn upset.
please help, wes

Elf,

I suggest you speak with someone at your bank, and someone at your grandmother's bank about the issue. Ask for their advice about how to handle the issue. Hopefully they can refer you to a lawyer that might be able to help stop this.

I would also speak with your other relatives and show them any proof you have. Somebody else in the family is bound to listen and the more people you have behind you, the harder it will be for your grandmother to ignnore what is going on.

This kind of financial abuse happens alot and someone out there will know how to deal with it.

Good luck to you, post again and let us know how it is going.

if you're like me, there isn't always a relative that will listen to what's being done to your loved one. i was my 82 year old widowed mother's caregiver for the past ten years. she progressed into senile dementia and began experiencing attacks of delirium. a 74 year old brother of hers literally came out of the woodwork and rather than trying to help me, assaulted me and isolated my mother from contact with me, my daughter, and my brother as well, through violence. he's coerced mother into numerous changes, e.g. powers-of-attorney (durable and medical), deed transfers, changes to her Will, and he closed out my bank accounts (that i had jointly with my mom), closed out all of her other accounts, and consolidated all the monies into a new account. then he bought a new truck. more recently, his daughter, my cousin, entered mom's life after a 30 year absence, and bought a 2004 ford explorer with my mom's money. (i was able to recover my own funds through my lawyer, by the way.) my mother has three other siblings besides this vulturous leech of a brother, but they're all elderly as well, and choose to keep their heads in the sand over the situation. my mom is being denied appropriate medical attention as well. (of course, i'm just summarizing all of this info.) but i contacted our local sheriff's department, our county's prosecuting attorney, the medical community,adult protective services, and every senior assistance organization in the book. all i've gotten since this occurred last spring is just a royal passing of the buck...nobody's doing their job, basicallly! i've kept contact with my lawyer throughout, and now i've initiated a lawsuit against my uncle by paying my lawyer a retainer fee of $1,500. he charges $125 an hour. i'm making a lot of sacrifices...BUT THAT'S MY MOTHER!
i wish you all the luck in the universe with finding some sort of
solution to the situation with your grandmother. it's easier to sweep it under the rug and pretend it isn't happening. especially when everywhere you turn for help, you don't find any. but if you haven't given up yet (and sweetie, believe me...i know), get in touch with a lawyer, or someone from the legal aid society. i don't have any support behind me through the nightmare i've been living through, except for God...and he is sufficient. (imagine just how often this abuse occurs and is ignored...it's truly unconscionable!)
i'm praying for you...get a lawyer. as to your grandmother's thinking that this granddaughter who's doing all of this is just a 'real peach of a person'...sweetie, read some topics on, 'The Stockholm Syndrome'. GOOD LUCK!!!

well it's november 2004 and the abuse is still going on. i am still living with my grandma, taking care of her, while my cousin is still taking all her money every month. we never see the bank statements or the checkbook. my grandma seems to be brainwashed as to this situation.
i tell her all the time that she needs her money and she refuses to talk about it, saying that if she wants to give here money away it's her business. but it is being taken not given in my mind. they think because they have power of attorney they can get away with it, but social security has advised me that it's not the case. she is guilty of fraud and elder abuse as well as credit card fraud for using all my grandmas credit cards to the tune of $30,000. we are at odds at what to do. she would surely be jailed for these crimes. but we would be dis-owned i'm sure. i am a beneficiary of her estate and don't want to lose that. it is very troubling to us relatives. what is the solution or the first step. should i just forget it? let her be robbed? and lose my money in the end?

Well I am posting this over a year later, but maybe this will help someone. If your grandmother, or anyone is being abused or finacially exploited, please please call Adult Protective Services (APS) at 1-877-SOS-ADULT (1-877-767-2385). There are laws in place to protect elderly persons, and APS can investigate and take proper action if needed.