For the littles

I’m sad.

Nooa comes sometimes and I can color pictures with him. There wasn’t any lion pictures but I colored one where was a boy with a dog.

Leon, 4 (with Nooa)

Hi Leon,

I'm glad you got to color. I'm sorry you are sad.

Evan

Oliver we don,t celebrate Christmas either. Lots of outside people do house has to be clean and pretty. But I good with color. Get to put stuff around house. Picked reindeer this year. Put blinking lights on plants & balls on them like tree. Pilgrim said we take time to wish happy things for people.

Sorry Evan you have to take pills. We don't like pills either. You sound brave.

Leon we got new pictures to color. Forget name. It was half lion half eagle. Big wings. We want a real one.I

Got to go see T man today. Can't wear PJs. No get to talk to him cuz some scared. Scared one always go first a rule
Like you all talk to me. Nobody talk to me before.

~Puddy

Hello Leon. This is Oliver.

I wasn't around when you were here before. I like to color also, but I don't get to do it very much. A lion picture would be really cool to color. Right now, we only have a coloring book about under the sea that we got because Nadia likes mermaids. And a complicated coloring book that isn't good for crayons.

Most of what we do everyday is stupid things that OTHER people like but not ME.

I'm sorry you are sad.
______

Hi Leon,

I missed you because you were one of my first friends. I think the very first. I'm glad you're back. I'm sorry you're sad. I'm sad most of the time--it's kind of my job.

Jenia

We celebrate Hanukkah. Only cuz the outside family does. We believe in a lot of different things.

So Happy Hanukkah to anyone else out there.

MD Kids

-- Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:56 am --

Hello Jenia,

We're sorry you're sad. You said it's your job. Do you ever want a different job?

Jeannine, Lauranine, and Christine

Hi Jeannine, Lauranine, and Christine,

Do your names all rhyme? They're pretty together.

Maybe someday I might want a different job, but first I need to have more practice being real and being here today. I never thought I was supposed to exist and I thought it was only because no one really wanted us to be in the world when we were born.

I mean, that's a big reason, and it could be part of why I feel that way, but then we realized that I thought I wasn't supposed to exist because we weren't supposed to have parts because nothing "bad enough" happened to us. And we thought lots of REALLY bad stuff had to happen for a long time to have parts.

Anyway, my T is helping me (and all of us) remember that I'm real, because HE always remembers that I'm real and he even carries a real thing around with him so I can remember that he remembers.

Sometimes I ask to look at it and he gets it to show me. And sometimes he tells a story about having it out in the world with him. That helps me feel even more real.

And probably someday I will have to talk about some of the things that make me so sad, and then maybe we won't need me as much to have that job.

Jenia
P.S. I hope I didn't talk about this too much. I don't want to make anyone ELSE sad.

Is OK to talk about sad things cos we is already sad because is sad time and we hurt our back and now everything is harder and was already sad. But we gs helping less with words today because bigs tired.

we had to go to therapy today we usually don't like because it always feels like she's trying to get rid of us at the end which is strange because she listens to us

The feeling she was trying to get rid of us was really strong today and we were very sad walking home.

- ophelia

im sorry ophilia... I am upset because my grown up alter lizbeth joined with lauren so I don'thave a mommy anymore. My therapist thinks its great.... im scared they will get rid of me next. I feel like i has no one

Can someone else look after chu? Aunty Summer looks after me!

~May