unusual alter/no more doubt

Hi everyone,

I've learned of a new alter. This happened a couple nights ago. He spoke to me in my head and showed me scenes of things. The most unusual thing about the whole thing is... this alter is animated. As in, cartoons. I'm trying not to think about it too much, because quite honestly, I think it's a bit strange and kind of freaks me out a little bit. He showed me an image of himself. He is not human. I don't feel comfortable describing exactly what he looks like (I don't think he wants me to), but let me just say that he is very large, and almost like some sort of super-human/super-hero figure with tons of strength.

Has anyone ever heard of an animated alter before? I told my therapist about this experience last night, and I asked her if she thought it was weird, and she very reassuringly told me that she didn't think it was weird at all, and in fact everything I told her made a lot of sense. I told her, well I'm glad it makes sense to one of us. I just have never heard of this before, and am wondering if anyone out there has alters who are animated, or has ever heard of this. Let me be clear- not only is he animated, but his world is animated, and he thinks in animation. So the scenes he was showing me were completely animated. If anyone wants to read a more detailed description of my experience with this alter, you can read about it here: http://nothinginmynoggin.wordpress.com/ ... real-rage/

The best thing that has come out of this interaction is that I am no longer doubting the DID. I mean, I'm sure I'll have doubts come up as they always have, but this experience really takes away the mountains of doubt that I've been carrying about the diagnosis. This is what I've been desperately wanting - some sort of experiencing where I will know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I have DID. And this experience provided that reassurance. So that feels really good.

Interesting! Much of DID is based on how much the child uses their imagination to survive awful trauma. So I don't think that's weird at all! It makes me wonder if a child would feel derealization as being in a cartoon world?

That is wonderfully weird but does make sense too. He sounds kind of like Iron Giant. Congratulations.

Quato felt and sounded very cartoony when he arrived. He sounded absolutely insane. Literally made Three Stooges and Warner Brothers cartoon sounds and all sorts of sound effects for hours. And his self description was bizarre -- orange hair (as in carrot), weird clothes. The insanity was not actually real but I think he believed it about himself or was used to seeing the world that way.

Yes, this one absolutely clear benefit from having a very unusual alter, or more than one. There can be little doubt about the DID. I somehow explained away the first two alters, but when Jack arrived, a hillbilly speaking a different dialect, there was just no rational argument anymore. I couldn't be making him up if I tried. I also have a little guy with a British accent and one whose grammar is just regular blue color speech. And I understand exactly why they are the way they are. It makes perfect sense why I needed to be them at those moments in time when they arrived.

I think that is pretty cool.

What Walden said, "It makes me wonder if a child would feel derealization as being in a cartoon world?" makes a lot of sense. In some situations, you probably needed someone with super powers and that could see the world as a cartoon. Those situations were probably a lot easy to deal with when that one was out.

Sure it's weird, but it makes a lot of sense.

I do have a cartoon among my others. She is a cartoon in the inner world. I don't know how she sees anything. I haven't worked with her at all yet. I need to but I'm kinda scared of her memories. But I know she isn't really Smurfette. If her feeling like she is makes her feel safer, then I'm all for it. One day when I am strong enough to work with her, maybe she will turn back into her human form. Until she is ready to be a human, not a cartoon, she is welcome to be whoever she wants to be.

It would be pretty cool to see the world as a big cartoon. That's an experience that would be kinda fun to have. If I were you, I would be tempted to blend with him in hopes of seeing things the way he does. It would make even the most boring things in life fun.

I have "the Hulk"

Thank you all so much for your responses. It is reassuring to know that there are other people out there who have alters that are animated, or at least feel animated.

It was quite a strange experience, the night that this part revealed itself to me, that it still seems very surreal and "other-worldly." I haven't had any communication from that part since then, except perhaps passive influence. This part's essence is rage, and I felt extreme amounts of rage come up last night, so I suppose it could have been coming from this part.

ashesoflife wrote:It would be pretty cool to see the world as a big cartoon. That's an experience that would be kinda fun to have. If I were you, I would be tempted to blend with him in hopes of seeing things the way he does. It would make even the most boring things in life fun.

One of the stranger parts of the communication between myself and this part was that he brought me, in my mind, into his world. Or at least, I was able to see the things he was showing me. It was very strange, because everything was in animation! I remember thinking, wow, I've never thought in animation before! It was strange and bizarre and delightful all at the same time. Even though I was in/watching his animated world, I didn't experience myself as animated. I was there to watch what he wanted me to see. I don't think he's ever spent time in the body (that I know of), so quite honestly I don't know what he thinks of the outside world, or if he sees it as animated or not.


As for the denial, it's come back big time. Probably a big part of is that I've had no communication from this part since. It could be that perhaps I'm afraid of it, since there's so much rage there, that I'm not allowing to happen. I really don't know. But I start thinking, did that even really happen? How could that have been real? Sigh.