Parenting, Time loss, Disclosure

Recently I experienced an episode of time loss that commanded attention. They've happened in the past, sometimes for weeks at a time, but this recent one last 3 days. I'd forgotten they happen since it had been so long since my last one.

I'd like to talk to my treatment team about this, but am hesitant because I'm also a mother of a young child. My fear is they will deem me to be an unfit parent, or force me to undergo testing and unwanted treatments in order to keep custody of my child.

Has anyone here (male or female) disclosed their time loss/dissociation to their treatment team and are a parent as well? How did they proceed?

I have 5 kids and 4 grandkids. I tell them everything.


My opinion is that lying and hiding things causes problems and distrust. My kids can usually tell when I am me and when I am another me. They get annoyed with time loss, but they understand it.

I don't really have a treatment team anymore but I can really understand your fears. I am reluctant to share certain things with my therapist because of this exact reason, afraid that he'll call CPS on me or something and my biggest fear is having my son taken from me because of this-its almost happened but I got help and have worked really hard. Time loss and dissociation are very scary because you don't feel in control and being parents we must be in control so I can understand how scary that can be for you. I think there is a part in us though that would never ever allow us to do anything to hurt or put our children in harms way. I don't know if you're religious and forgive me for those of you who aren't but I trust in God to never allow me to slip away too much so that I can always be there for my son. I trust that He is doing this every day, helping me. Maybe these concerns are something you can discuss with your treatment team and hopefully they can alleviate some of your fears. Their job and purpose is to help you get well.

Hello ladyswan. Nice to see you here.

I know there was someone in particular here who had an experience with disclosing her time loss to her therapist and was questioned about her suitability as a parent as a result but I can't remember who it was... It prompted a very interesting discussion thread about other people's experiences of this too. I have to wrack my brains and try to think who it was and what the thread was called to see if I can find it for you, as it would be very relevant to this topic...

What happened during those 3 days? I would need a clear answer to that question before making any decision. Were your children safe during those 3 days? Did other adults interact with you? Do they have any concerns about your behavior during that time? If I had so much time loss I would want to be sure my children were safe with the alter in executive control. Who is this alter?

My child is perfectly safe. No harm ever has, or ever will be done to her by my hands. Just thought I'd clarify that.

The issue isn't about whether or not I'd harm her. I'm worried that OTHER people, namely my treatment team, may think this is an issue and create problems. Based on the responses, my fear has become a bit more cemented and I'm going to choose to hold back information from them at this time.

Are you Borderline or DID? both?

My Mother was borderline - I think.

It sounds like you are a good mother though.

I have mixed personality disorder and CPTSD, which is where the dissociation comes in. I don't think enough attention has been paid in therapy to the dissociative episodes though, and they've never been properly addressed. I'd love to fully disclose the full history of them, including the more recent ones, but I fear that unless I'm able to tell them everything that happened during each episode (and I'm not able to), they'll assume my daughter is in some sort of danger and have her removed.

As far as I can tell, during this last episode nothing out of the ordinary happened. I remember math lessons and changing dirty diapers, but that's it. My friends and family had no clue that I was dissociated and nothing suggests some sort of crisis happened.

ladyswan wrote:I have mixed personality disorder and CPTSD, which is where the dissociation comes in. I don't think enough attention has been paid in therapy to the dissociative episodes though, and they've never been properly addressed. I'd love to fully disclose the full history of them, including the more recent ones, but I fear that unless I'm able to tell them everything that happened during each episode (and I'm not able to), they'll assume my daughter is in some sort of danger and have her removed.

As far as I can tell, during this last episode nothing out of the ordinary happened. I remember math lessons and changing dirty diapers, but that's it. My friends and family had no clue that I was dissociated and nothing suggests some sort of crisis happened.

My understanding of therapy in the US (I don't know where you are) is that you can murder someone and a therapist cannot tell. However if you are planning to murder someone, they must tell.

It seems so hard to take kids away from a Mother. I hope you are not in any danger of that. You care for your daughter. I think that would be obvious and no one would try and take her away, but it's always best to be cautious. Kids should always come first.

Son, in this group has C-PTSD as well.

When there are children involved they are compelled to report any suspicion that the child may be abused or neglected. There doesn't need to be concrete evidence.

Anyone who meets my daughter can tell she isn't abused or neglected in any way. She's thriving and very outgoing. I'm sure that any worker who meets her can tell she is well taken care of, but... I'm still a single mother with mental illness. There's stigma. I fear they'll use that against me and try to justify sticking her into a potentially abusive foster home until I fight my way through the court system. That's partially paranoia talking, but it's a real possibility. People have their children removed over less.