Time Loss

What it felt like for me this morning. I have it so often, but sometimes it's draining - very, very draining.

http://dx-dissociative-identity-disorde ... ntity.html


Does anyone have good enough communication in their system that they know what occurred last time they lost time?

Probably not helpful, but the last time I lost time was a few months ago when an alter most of us didn't even know about punked me by waking up while I slept and posting a DID-suggestive photo as my Facebook pic. I asked the gatekeeper if he knew what happened and he said I did it. I knew I hadn't and we quickly figured out it must be an alter the gatekeeper didn't know about and who appeared to the gatekeeper as if he were me. Very shortly, Quato announced himself to us and the gatekeeper was able to identify him as a new alter immediately. Quato says he came up with that prank as his debut and had every intention of coming forward. I was not amused at the time but, in hindsight, I marvel at his coming up with that, though it's totally consistent with his personality.

I usually wake up to a note documenting things that transpired while I was out of commission. Some day to day stuff is tracked but mostly it's phone calls, visitors, receipts and decisions made that effect the body. My system is not co-conscious and while I'm usually the one fronting (not the core) when I come back from being lost the note is the only way I can catch up.

We set it up the note system as a contract where whomever is out writes the note and in turn I try to stay relaxed and not fight them when someone wants to come out. (the headaches are not as bad as a result).

Kero

Perhaps your system may be able to help you avert the full impact of the triggers that cause a switch? I've had to ask inside more than once for assistance when I get triggered at work. I've made a general blanket plea for that to happen if anyone gets triggered in public. I just asked my gatekeeper how this happens and he replied: You are looking for the others to provide a cushion should you begin to fall and to the extent they are able and willing, they have done this. Specifically, Jonathan can imbue the body with calm and Sphinx can cause me to dissociate briefly without losing time, so that I blank a bit and remain at a distance from the emotional impact. Others can help as well, based on their gifts.

I always get told what happened when I wasn't there. Mostly internal photos showing a brief outline of events. It's time consuming to process everything but doesn't really bother me apart from that. Maybe because we all do a quick mental scan for objections before deciding anything, so we're always checking in with each other and not doing anything that would upset the others. X

During this eventful morning of time loss - we changed host. The host is once again Helga. Rachel was replaced and her Gorilla was locked up the other day and now her snake. We have turmoil!

It's so confusing. Helga says she is writing this. It feels like Core Self. Helga feels the same as Rachel. I am so confused!

Occasionally. For the general most part, yes, we try to fill each other in as much as possible, usually with images because for some reason it aids us more. Sometimes a hidden alter will front and no one can recall what happened though. It's harder to recover lost information as well.

When I lose time no one tells me anything about what I missed. For me this is the single worst part of my having DID.

It's about communication - at least for me. I ask my ISH and System Managers daily if I lost time. If I did then I ask the part that was out what's up. If i did not ask, then I would rarely know. I know that not many systems work like this, but even building this type of relationship with one part would help a great deal. My system puts a lot of weight into my appearing and feeling normal.

7 year old Madeline wrote something cute this morning...
She said: "The Father thinks I have black hair like tylas.
He does not know I have red hair.
He does not know I am Madeline.
He did not do this on purpose. He does not
even know I have DID. Foolish man.
We tricked him!"

I would really have no clue that I lost time, if I could not ask those inside and get answers. Heck, I would not know much of anything. It impresses me that others can figure out what is going on without asking.