the system's sexuality?

Trigger, more sexual stuff

Ugh. Sometimes I think the world would be so much easier if it weren't for this sexuality thing!!! I honestly hate it. I think I'm straight, yet according to my sister I look like a lesbian. Not to mention I sometimes feel like I am, even though I know I'm not. I can't seem to go a day without looking at lesbian porn, yet I am attracted to only males at work. As my disclaimer below this post says, I don't have DID as far as I know, but I most certainly have different parts of myself that are ALWAYS in conflict concerning identity issues like this!

Our system sexuality is bisexual, simply because that's what I identify as, and everyone is ok that, but we have some straight alters, one alter who only likes girls (but she hates the word "lesbian" ), and several asexual alters.

So yeah. Even if you appear bisexual as a whole to the outside world, it doesn't really matter that much. Y'all know what each of you are inside, and what you are not. And it would simplify it for people who don't know you're multiple, or who you don't want to tell...things like that. -nods-

dividedtruth89 wrote:I can't seem to go a day without looking at lesbian porn, yet I am attracted to only males at work.

Interesting. I look at male, sometimes bisexual porn but for 20+ have had zero interest in having a relationship with a male. Jonathan and others have looked at female porn but they aren't much into porn as they're more romantically inclined. Jack is interested but gets embarrassed due to his age. We just made a pact with Sphinx tonight to prevent me from accessing male porn on the internet in the future. We weren't sure he could do that, but he's the gatekeeper and it worked. If it continues to work, we're going to ask him to prevent us from eating unhealthy foods, force us to exercise on a regular basis, maybe other things. I keep forgetting we have a robot inside, connected directly to the nervous system or something, who can pretty much trump us all. We hope.

I will be very happy when the dang abuse-caused, DID-related messed up sexuality is fully reset to the body's norm.