My GF

My girlfriend told me she has DID. I am totally ok with this and find it very interesting. What concerns me though is her abilty to introduce me to her alters. She wrote me an email and formally indroduced me to her alter then allowed her alter to finnish this email. I never realized that DID was voluntary. Can many people with DID do this?

Daylight,

Hello. It sounds like your gf is co-conscious with her alters.

Yes, what you describe is very possible. Sometimes, i can switch at will, other times i can't no matter how much i try. And, at still other times, the switching is involuntary or i am not aware of who is in or out or doing what. It can be very complicated. You should know that she probably is not always able to control the switching so things may not be as easy as it may seem.

But what your gf did is not unusual. It does not make me raise an eyebrow or anything.

Hope this helps a little.

Best wishes,
Stolen

Daylight,

Although I'm integrated now, I have a long past history with DID....and I understand that a good many people do not want to become integrated. The choice is as it should be...up to the host and system.

What you are describing with your g/f is really quite normal. When I was in the early stages of trying to recover I had quite a bit of difficulty as to which alter was out. As I was able to know my system better I was able to decide who was out or not.

I've got a question allong these lines,

If someone with DID, is in contact with their alter, could they "translate" what their alter is saying without actualy switching?

I do that in therapy all of the time. If someone else is up front with me and they want out but I'm too scared to give up control I just tell my therapist what they are saying. It works for me but it does make the other part mad that I wont let them out to speak for themselves.

PsiWraith,

If someone is co conscious and in 'contact' with the alter, yes.

Some people hold 'family' meetings with alters to work on cooperation.

Personally, I can often hear and carry on conversations with some of mine when they are willing.

Alters can do this with other alters also if they are co conscious of each other.

Hope this helps.

best wishes,
stolen

Is it unusual to be coconscious with an alter without realizing that you are DID until someone points it out?

You'd think it would be a big tip off, but what if you've just had this other voice with you so long that you no longer thought anything of it, besides being a big help when it comes to solving problems...you know:

"wonder how this fits in here?"
"You could try it that way..."
"You sure, Dosent look like it could work."
"Just try it."
"Hey it works!"
"Told ya..."

Sorry...I'm kinda weird sometimes.

PsiWraith,

I can only speak for myself, but i was aware of a particular presence (alter) for most of my life - a male presence (and i am female). It was more than him speaking to me, however. I often felt like i became this male (dressing, acting differently, wanting and doing different things). At the time, i did not know what was going on. I just thought i had a weird imagination which i was compelled to act upon, and this was some form of escapism or something. Why male, i don't know because i am not gay.

I've also heard voices in my head since i was a teenager. Again, did not understand this...

Despite this, it never even occured to me that i could be multiple.
So, i think you could be co conscious with an alter and not realize you are DID. Even when my t suggested to me that i was disscociating, i didn't believe it. I still go into denial, even now, at times.

You speak of a voice that has been present a long time. If you are referring to yourself, do you ever feel like this voice is a presence that takes control of you - becomes you, sort of speak, or your behavior?

Two of the criteria for DID:

The patient has at least two distinct identities or personality states. Each of these has its own, relatively lasting pattern of sensing, thinking about and relating to self and environment.

At least two of these personalities repeatedly assume control of the patient's behavior.

DID is on a continum...so there is partial DID (as in DID NOS, depersonalization, etc).

On the other hand, lots of people simply tallk to themselves in their head, referring to themselves as "you". For me, this male presence seemed distinct from me, seperate - even before i know i was DID.

Not sure if i am helping or not, but wish you the best.

stolen

Kevin (Me): shy, peaceful, relatively polite...

Katlin (the other one): too uncaring of others oppinions to be shy, loves a good fight, etc...

Katlin takes over sometimes, but realy prefers just to be a back seat driver, telling me what to do...We boath like physics though and have many philosophical descussions...they get quite interesting...