I Wish I Could Just Leave... *Triggers*

Yes... This is going to be a rant thread, but I feel like if I rant to Kylee and Kendra one more time, their ears will fall off.

Basically, my parents have been fighting nonstop for the past three days. Fighting, as in yelling and screaming at the top of their lungs fighting. Of course, my dad started all of it. Him and his freaking drinking. He yelled at me and mom because WE WENT TO THE FREAKING MOVIES. It was our first time going to the movies in literally a year and he had to frekaing ruin it because we didnt have the money to pay for his stupid rum. Then he yells at us because we aren't his slaves. Because we don't spend all of out time cleaning this worthless house.
And dont even get me started on the Gun thing. If you dont know what I mean by The Gun Thing you can ask in a PM. He think he's IN THE RIGHT. He thinks what he did was the RIGHT thing to do.
So, me and mom left last night and stayed at a friend's house. While there, my mom promised me that this was the final straw, that we were going to leave and be happy without him. Guess where I am right now. Im sitting at HOME. She brought me back freaking home. She betrayed me AGAIN. I shouldn't have been so stupid as to believe her. She says we're going to leave tomorrow but I don't believe her anymore. I have no trust for anyone right now. The sad thing is. I CANT trust anyone expect for what my own mind made. Even at that I cant trust all of my alters. Its so frustrating to be so alone in such a huge freaking world.
I wish I could tell my mom about all the crap He has done to me. How he made me screwed up in the head. How me made me Antisocial. How he made me "that one girl". But I can't. All that'll do is tick off my mom and then more fighting will come.
This is why I never want to get married.. Never want kids.. Why would I bring a kid into such a screwed up world..?
Oh, and on top of my lovely family issues, I even have to deal with my new alters, The Dark One. He's really not helping. You know that voice in the back of your head that always mocks you, tells you you're worthless? He's playing that part right now and it's really not helping at all. Not to mention he's been poking the fire and starting fights among the group. Everyone's in total chaos and there's nothing I can do but sit by and watch. I feel helpless. Weak. Alone.I don't like it.. I just wish I could've been born into a different family. I wish none of this would've happened to me.

Sorry.. Im not trying to play the "poor me" card, but it's how I feel.

I don't know if I'm going to be much help... but I just want to say I'm sorry for what you're having to go through. I remember when I was having to still live under my parents roof and how crazy it made me feel... Please just know you're not alone. I know it feels like it. I feel that way myself sometimes. Quite a bit actually...

Is it possible to contact social services, or something similar to that? Tell the authorities about what your dad's done? I'm sorry that you are in an unsafe environment. The most important thing is to get you safe. And if your mom won't do it... well have you thought about telling the police or social services or something like that about your dad to get you out of that situation? I know it's a tricky tricky issue, and I'm not claiming there's an easy answer, I just thought I would ask if that's a possibility.

I have.. And i want to.. But.. I dunno.. Im afraid to? I dont know how to describe it. Something just keeps telling me not to. And besides.. If my mom doesnt leave, then Ill just leave in a few months when I turn 17..

I'm sorry you are in such a sticky situation. Hopefully things will get better.

I'm glad to hear that you will be able to leave - at the most - in a few months. It sounds awfully hard and extremely triggering to be there... but at least you know you are going to be out soon. Keep posting on here for support. Hang in there.x

LunaSyko, I've lived with an alcoholic dad and stepdad too, and sadly enough I can totally relate to your situation regarding every aspect of your family life you described here.
I believe that alcoholism (and other intoxicant dependencies for that matter) is a mental and physical illness of the worst kind. It enslaves the user and makes him an asshole who thinks everyone around needs to tend him and his drinking, and it's very damaging to the close ones. It's common that while the alcoholic is hooked on his drink, his partner is hooked on the relationship and the drama and makes all sorts of empty promises and decisions of leaving. I'm sorry you have to go through all that. Good though that you can leave home soon.

I turn 17 in late October. I haven't told my mom or any of my family about my decision, because no good will come from it. I figured I'd just make an announcement after i turn 17 that Im leaving to move in with my friend, T. T and her mom have been trying to get me to move in with them for a few months now.

I dont know if that's a good idea or bad idea, but that's the only way I can think of going about this. And thanks guys for the support..