Check in: Hypersexuality

Yep. Thats us. Especially C.Nic and TK. They share women durring sex. C does most of the work, and TK takes control for random, violent outbursts of slapping and super fast humping.

Recently, they've been so horny they masturbated us dry. It got so bad I had to ask my doctor/ex-fb/gf if it would damage any internal organs. The answer was no, fyi. I feel stupid... I could have just asked TK!!!

I used to be hypersexual. Now the pendulum has swung and I can't have sex.
Part of it has to do with having sex with a partner who is also DID but has WAY more alters - and all of them wanted to have sex - it was like 2-3 times a day and it would be a week or more before each one got a turn and none of them wanted to share. That was exhausting. My system doesn't work like that, I have yet to map myself but I think there's only 2 that have sex.

Then some misfortune happened and my young child part was raped a few times. My partner had no idea this was a child part and I don't think they understood not to have sex with her, and they were a little aggressive. Anyway it triggered something and now sex turned into nothing but pain for all of me. I've been to my OBGYN who has given me several pain disorder names and said it was psychological. I can't afford a therapist to fix it. its been a few years of avoiding sex or closing my eyes or crying through it.

I'm trying to create someone to have sex and enjoy it, Its hard because I can't split off a part of me that likes it at all. creating something out of nothing has been near impossible.

tylas wrote:http://www.empty-memories.nl/didmpd.html
Check this out. I am not sure if he agrees with me, but I concede to him either way. He seems to really understand the ANP/EP stuff.

Thanks for that link Tylas. I found it really easy to understand.

This thread has really made me think!
Very interesting...I always put my times of high libido down to hypomania (I'm now questioning my bipolar dx) but the more I think about it, the more it seems like a part (fragment?) whose whole raison d'etre is to hook a man.

Best, Zel.

tylas wrote:I figured you did.

http://www.empty-memories.nl/didmpd.html
Check this out. I am not sure if he agrees with me, but I concede to him either way. He seems to really understand the ANP/EP stuff.

Thank you. That was very good; it didn't cause too much anxiety, either.
Do we HAVE to define them by one or the other? >.>; How do you define gatekeepers, who seem to know where those memories are/have access to them but aren't triggered so much? o.o

Maybe if it's like ned, it's because they tend to consider themselves as meta-parts or outside of the system and don't see or feel the information and such as if it were personal or part of themselves, but from a sort of third-person view, like looking at a diagram or reading a book?

turtlegirl wrote:I used to be hypersexual. Now the pendulum has swung and I can't have sex.

Turtlegirl, I am so sorry. Have you found any books helpful? I have not read much on this topic but one book I read, that was helpful for me, is The Survivor's Guide to Sex: How to Have an Empowered Sex Life After Child Sexual Abuse by Staci Haines. There are many others like it.

Zel wrote:Very interesting...I always put my times of high libido down to hypomania (I'm now questioning my bipolar dx) but the more I think about it, the more it seems like a part (fragment?) whose whole raison d'etre is to hook a man.

Zel, do you mean an alter is blending with you, flooding you? Why do you feel it is a fragment? I know my Alter 1, who definitely is not a fragment, was responsible for my limerence and "pursuit" of the man because my Alter 2 said so and Alter 1 agreed. I do not know Alter 1's main function, but it appears not to be pursuit of men. As far as I know, Alter 1 has pursued someone only twice in my lifetime; both times it seems there was a subtle trauma trigger involved, because I hardly knew the man.

Re the idea that an ANP by definition has no memories of trauma, this varies from system to system. A high functioning ANP may face a traumatic event rather than switching inside while another alter switches out. In this way an ANP may acquire traumatic memories. I am an ANP who has done this.

By the way, it appears that an alter whose function is sex can be an ANP or an EP. Sexual alters who seek sex tend to be EPs; those who simply receive it tend to be ANPs.

Una+ wrote:
Re the idea that an ANP by definition has no memories of trauma, this varies from system to system. A high functioning ANP may face a traumatic event rather than switching inside while another alter switches out. In this way an ANP may acquire traumatic memories. I am an ANP who has done this.

By the way, it appears that an alter whose function is sex can be an ANP or an EP. Sexual alters who seek sex tend to be EPs; those who simply receive it tend to be ANPs.

The books does say usually the ANP has no memories of trauma. The authors seem careful about making absolutes.

What do you think is the difference between and ANP and an EP? An ANP does have emotion I think (its just that usually they do not have too much) so that is not the answer, there is more.

Una+ wrote:

Zel wrote:Very interesting...I always put my times of high libido down to hypomania (I'm now questioning my bipolar dx) but the more I think about it, the more it seems like a part (fragment?) whose whole raison d'etre is to hook a man.

Zel, do you mean an alter is blending with you, flooding you? Why do you feel it is a fragment? I know my Alter 1, who definitely is not a fragment, was responsible for my limerence and "pursuit" of the man because my Alter 2 said so and Alter 1 agreed. I do not know Alter 1's main function, but it appears not to be pursuit of men. As far as I know, Alter 1 has pursued someone only twice in my lifetime; both times it seems there was a subtle trauma trigger involved, because I hardly knew the man.

Actually Una,

I don't know what I'm talking about. What is a fragment?
I guess I thought maybe it is a fragment because its only function seems to be sex & getting a man.

Not sure what you mean by the alter blending with me / flooding me? Could you explain?
I would describe it more like that hyper-sexual part came to the forefront and sort of took over.?
I wasn't on meds at the time and what I think is my ANP doesn't have nearly as much control when I'm not medicated. Does that sound crazy?
When I am on meds, that part, which I think of as the 'controlling part' has an unbelievable amount of power and control. She keeps me in line. Stops any EP's from expressing themselves in front of anyone (which makes therapy pretty hard). Keeps the brittle facade of functional, intelligent, attractive, good mum etc while underneath my EP's are screaming - so resentful / furious at being kept hidden.
Yet, I recognise how much that ANP has helped me. It's exhausting though - keeping all that energy underground. That's why I'm fatigued I think.

Does this sound like DDNOS to you? I'm still confused and very new to this.

Best, Zel.

ZeldaZonk wrote:What is a fragment?

A fragment is basically a single issue alter, often a single-use alter. Often, a fragment alter is split off during a single instance of a particular kind of trauma that was not repeated, so the alter was never sent out again, and did not grow in experience, complexity, or power. Often they seem to have been sleeping or in stasis, and when they awaken they relive the trauma in which they were created. Fragments usually do not have the ability to make you lose time, and often do not actively come out of hiding to reveal themselves to. You are most likely to find them when you start going inside.

ZeldaZonk wrote:I guess I thought maybe it is a fragment because its only function seems to be sex & getting a man.

Not sure what you mean by the alter blending with me / flooding me? Could you explain?
I would describe it more like that hyper-sexual part came to the forefront and sort of took over.?
I wasn't on meds at the time and what I think is my ANP doesn't have nearly as much control when I'm not medicated. Does that sound crazy?

That sounds normal. In a DID context blending is when you feel that you are yourself, not losing time nor co-present nor co-conscious, except you are experiencing emotions that don't seem to be your own. Flooding is simply blending to such an extent that you are overwhelmed. The ISSTD guidelines for treating DID refer to this blending and flooding as having the experience of "made" emotions.

This concept of "made" thoughts, emotions, and behaviors (as in "someone made me do it") goes back to a 1911 book by Eugen Bleuler. A 2003 book, The self in neuroscience and psychiatry discusses this. Bleuler's book was concerned with schizophrenia, but in 1911 DID was virtually unknown and thus psychiatric patients with DID were likely to be misdiagnosed with schizophrenia.

ZeldaZonk wrote:Does this sound like DDNOS to you? I'm still confused and very new to this.

Zel, to me what you describe sounds like either DDNOS or DID.

Wikipedia: Eugen Bleuler
Google Books: The self in neuroscience and psychiatry

Una+ wrote:In a DID context blending is when you feel that you are yourself, not losing time nor co-present nor co-conscious, except you are experiencing emotions that don't seem to be your own. Flooding is simply blending to such an extent that you are overwhelmed. The ISSTD guidelines for treating DID refer to this blending and flooding as having the experience of "made" emotions.

This concept of "made" thoughts, emotions, and behaviors (as in "someone made me do it") goes back to a 1911 book by Eugen Bleuler. A 2003 book, The self in neuroscience and psychiatry discusses this. Bleuler's book was concerned with schizophrenia, but in 1911 DID was virtually unknown and thus psychiatric patients with DID were likely to be misdiagnosed with schizophrenia.

Thanks so much Una,

Oh my goodness this is so complex!
I don't think I could tell the difference between blending or co-consciousness. I'm not even sure what co-presence is.?

Is blending different from what I described? ("I would describe it more like that hyper-sexual part came to the forefront and sort of took over.")
I think I was still around but not in the driver's seat...

I guess I could put it the way you did when you explained blending actually, ("experiencing emotions that don't seem to be your own")
but then -
What's the difference between co-consciousness & blending

Thanks again, Zel.

Hi,
I've had sharply bounded bouts of hyper-sexual behavior my entire life. Doing some pretty extreme things that I'd rather not go into detail about, but similar to your experiences.
I can remember being really young, and certain parts of me would force me to do things, under the motto "to practice for later" (as a guy- body is female).
I also have periods of A-sexuality. The two can switch each other really quick sometimes, resulting in me asking for sex and then not wanting it ( 30 minutes later not knowing I rejected sex and wanting it again). Sometimes the A-sexuality lasts for a period of an alleged 3 weeks or even more.
I do not have any clear memories of sexual abuse. The "memories" that I do experience; I dont know if they are true. The ones who show me, or know about the images seem to insist that they are true but I do not think they fit into my life. This topic can cause big disagreements in here. Which results in me stopping the discussion, so nothing gets solved.
It confuses me because I know that so many of those who have DID, have a history of sexual abuse. I show all the behaviors of infantile sexual abuse, but I remember nothing. That is unsettling.
Also, I dont know why, but lately, having real sex seems to trigger the one who claims the memories to be hers, when she is not known to be the most sexual alter at all, she is an innocent kid.
I'm sorry if I address things that have been discussed. I cannot always keep up with every post yet.