Co-conscious

I am still in the early stages of understanding what has been going on with me. I think I am largely what seems to be called "co-conscious" (when another takes over I am able to recognise that I have fallen back into whatever inconsistency in my life - now that I am becoming more aware of what is going on I am starting even to recognise "who"). I don't notice the actual switch - but after a while I realise I am different again, and now able to look back and recognise how/who.

I'm just wondering about the difference between DDNOS and DID. My T has not given me that much information and I don't really like getting it off the internet - but I have a 2 week gap between T sessions. Anyway, does this co-consciousness / lack of amnesia (although there are times when amnesia does occur) make up the difference between DDNOS or DID?

I'm not really fussed about the actual diagnosis as such (provided I get better, and with my T's relaxed attitude to all this I am feeling hope that it is possible), I am just curious. Is the co-consciousness what makes the difference?

Not necessarily, but it can make a difference. In a sense, DDNOS is the spot on the scale which doesn't completely fit anywhere else. DDNOS can be DID in disguise, for that matter. The NOS stands for "not otherwise specified", and you can take it quite literally as saying that you have some type of dissociative disorder but don't quite fit exactly into any specific class.

So in a way it is not so much a disorder classification in itself. You could maybe think of it in terms of 'abuse' vs. 'severely beating a child.' One is more general, one is specific, but both are abuse (abuse is obviously abuse since it can't not be itself)

There isn't a lot of information on DDNOS.

Like gwilly said, it's basically a dissociative disorder that doesn't completely qualify as one of the others. If you have alters, and are diagnosed as having DDNOS, that probably means your alters aren't clear-cut, you don't lose time, etc. So yeah, the lack of amnesia is probably why you were diagnosed with that.

DDNOS kind of annoys me. Why can't it just be called whatever it most resembles?

Thanks very much for the replies.

Just to make it clear, I haven't been diagnosed with anything at all at this stage. My T has just started "mapping the system" with me. I don't know how long it takes to get an actual diagnosis? I'm not actually that fussed about it, but with 2 week breaks it's a long time to be working on this stuff alone without any feedback of information. I'm not even sure if looking for this information on the internet is ideal... hopefully next Wednesday I'll be able to make more sense of it all when I see her again.

Thanks again

What I've noticed with Co-conscious as they call it. Is that some of my alters can speak with one another. Often though I'm kept in the dark about a lot of stuff. And some alters are more privileged than others. But I can interact with my others at times and some of their personality quirks slip through, only I'm not really aware most of the time. Only some one really close is able to detect if an alter or multiple has reared their head. But then there is habits. I'll be in full control, but it won't be my normal habit or even something I necessarily like. For example: I'll be drawing and usually I like listening to music when I draw. But sometimes I don't listen to music. So I know it can't be totally me there drawing. Also the fact that my drawings are way different. And then it's just saying things out of context. LIke one of my alters likes girls and happens to be a 13 year old boy. So often times it will come out as "OMG jeez she is so hot" and the octaves and pitch will be there too. Then it's the hand I'll be using my Left hand more than usually. And I'm ambidextrous and so everything is almost half and half when I'm in control. Or if another person is a Righty which some of them are I'll be using that for most of the time.

That's how I explain co-consciousness. Then there are voices in your head telling you what to do like auditory hallucinations sometimes and not always. But I've had them. And for the longest time they labeled me schizoaffective. In fact these were just my alters speaking through me and to me. Some not so positive, but when I look at it objectively they were always out for my own good. Especially Nicodemus who seems to always push me when have suicidal ideation(sp?) Anyways? Comments? Re verb? Opposing sides?

geckopaws wrote:But I can interact with my others at times and some of their personality quirks slip through

I know what you mean. Sometimes I'll use a phrase or word that's something I would never use... I've even used words when I have no idea what the heck they mean That's usually from C. Sometimes I'll get so excited about toys or cartoons. Then, I'll look in the back of the room, and there's a kid there Or I'll say something kind of (for me) uncharacteristically mean... that would be from J Sometimes I can draw pretty well... other times I do a horrible job. I don't know who that's from.
I don't really like the color pink all that much, and yet, I always seem to choose pink. When I was little, I could never figure out why I did that J loves pink.

I don't really like the color pink all that much, and yet, I always seem to choose pink. When I was little, I could never figure out why I did that J loves pink.

You know this makes perfect since. As myself I don't like the color gray. I love the color royal blue purple. But every part of me loves the color gray and anything with grayish in it. I love buying clothes with gray or a grayish grain in them. And I think Viscus loves that color. Then Iris she loves the color Thistle. Loves it. I hate it cause again I think it's really dull. But I always tend to buy these colors for clothes or use them in my art work. And Red a lot too. I hate that color. But Nicodemus loves that color. LOL.

And then there are the uncharacteristically funny comments that come. They are usually very immature or pervert, but everyone seems to laugh because no one has heard it before. It surprises me because it just slips out. Viscus is responsible for that. That and loves to swear. For a 13 year old alter he sure does have a potty mouth. I guess all 13 year olds did at that age.

geckopaws wrote:You know this makes perfect since. As myself I don't like the color gray. I love the color royal blue purple. But every part of me loves the color gray and anything with grayish in it. I love buying clothes with gray or a grayish grain in them. And I think Viscus loves that color. Then Iris she loves the color Thistle. Loves it. I hate it cause again I think it's really dull. But I always tend to buy these colors for clothes or use them in my art work. And Red a lot too. I hate that color. But Nicodemus loves that color. LOL.

Good - someone else has the same thing going on

geckopaws wrote:And then there are the uncharacteristically funny comments that come. They are usually very immature or pervert, but everyone seems to laugh because no one has heard it before. It surprises me because it just slips out. Viscus is responsible for that. That and loves to swear. For a 13 year old alter he sure does have a potty mouth. I guess all 13 year olds did at that age.

Teens do swear a lot. I know how the slipping out part is

geckopaws wrote:As myself I don't like the color gray. I love the color royal blue purple. But every part of me loves the color gray and anything with grayish in it.

It is funny that you should mention this because just yesterday I had an epiphany about this
I was shopping which I HATE, and I mean really HATE. Especially when it comes to clothes. But some of the others like new clothes sometimes, so we were looking at the clearance rack at Target. There was a gray polo-type shirt for only $2 and I could hear the others arguing. The kids like bright bold colors and said they could never wear gray, but Meagan appears to like gray. Since she normally never asks or reveals anything , I bought it. (exception: she absolutely REFUSES to wear pink or let the others wear pink without freaking out). But that made me remember going shopping with a friend. I was there watching (and totally bored) but Sara was out. This was a fairly new friend and we had never shopped for clothes before. She remarked that the things "I" was choosing were definitely not what she would have expected me to buy (I tend to wear T-shirts and jeans because of work and less trouble). So yesterday I realized the reason why I get so frustrated when dressing is that my closet is filled with loud colors and I prefer to blend in. I'm glad we bought that gray shirt.

pacific wrote:I have a 2 week gap between T sessions

Therapist aka Irene: I don't believe this is a proper treatment regimen. From what I have read, the professionals in the field recommend at least one or even two sessions a week. They don't really recommend 3 except in times of crisis.
We go twice a week and I could not even imagine getting into trauma work for 45 minutes and then having to be alone with it for 2 weeks. I don't think...no, I know I couldn't go 2 weeks between sessions. Also, that doesn't really give everyone a chance to talk. There just wouldn't be time. I don't know how you do it. Kudos.

pacific wrote:Just to make it clear, I haven't been diagnosed with anything at all at this stage. My T has just started "mapping the system" with me. I don't know how long it takes to get an actual diagnosis?

Therapist aka Irene: Sometimes they don't like to disclose your diagnoses because for one, mental health professionals change their mind (A LOT in DeAnna's case). But if she is mapping with you, that is a treatment pretty specific for DID or DDNOS, so I would feel fairly confident that that is his/her diagnosis.
I wouldn't get caught up in it, but I had the same dis-rest in my mind about my diagnosis and finally I just came out and asked my psychiatrist. He didn't seem to have any qualms telling me.

pacific wrote:I'm just wondering about the difference between DDNOS and DID.

canolime wrote:DDNOS kind of annoys me.

I agree with canolime.
Therapist aka Irene: The criteria for DID includes amnesia (however brief) and at least one alter that can take full control (however brief). And the therapist/psychiatrist etc is supposed to have directly observed these. So if they haven't they just stick with DDNOS and later change it.
Veronica: But that's a bunch of bull-crap if you ask me. If it looks like $#%^, smells like $#%^, and tastes like $#%^; it probably is $#%^.
In other words: Do you dissociate? Yes. Are you sometimes unsure who you are or sure you are not you (identity crisis)? Yes. Then just give the dad-blamed Dissociative Identity diagnosis already. Or make a new category for co-consciousness (DDNOS includes other stuff as well). Why don't they just call it "DID-cc" or something?

Good luck with your info search.

DeAnna
with Veronica and Therapist (who has recently taken the name Irene for our T's convenience)

If you ask me going to therapy once a month is unbearable for me. Seriously. I feel like I'm being mind raped. I really do. Sorry to say. I feel like anything I say can be used against me in a court of law kind of thing since it has before.