Girlfriend with DID

From a brief converstation with one of her other alters, who refused to give a name, the younger alters all seem to be afraid, apart from one of them, who actually asked for a hug last week.

Also an adult alter, who is depressed and wants to die, and also wants to remain single. This isnt really suprising considering the ordeal she has been through.

If I keep trying to get close to her, the chances are the more protective the others will become. I think the only thing to do is back off, the only problem being she has to wait 16 weeks to see somebody, so its a long wait to get help. I think she is only just coming to terms with the fact that she has DID, so right now must be a terrible time for her.

If she lets me i want to stay around for her as a friend, but this last few days even that seems difficult.The other alters seem to have such strong defenses.

It seems that she has forgotten a lot of our time together, things we have done and said to each other, places we have been. This has occured after she had triggered, and seemed to change personality for several days.

Is it best I dont remind her, or do you think it will all come back to her and is just buried inside somewhere?

She seems to talk to me as if she barely knows me, and im quite sure it is her dominant personality is out. Is it possible the other alters are keeping or taking memories from her?

It's very possible that some of her alters are holding onto memories for her. If she is aware that she's forgotten so much, reminding her might only make her feel bad about it. You could sit down and talk to her about it though, just remember that she's the one who's missing memories that I'm sure she'd like to have back. If she can communicate with her system, maybe she can talk to them about letting her access those memories.
Hope that helps!

Thanks for the response Nessie. I attempted to jog her memory, and one of the angry alters just went mad at me, this was only via text message because she hasnt agreed to see me. Im not sure if her usually dominant personality has been out for a while now. They all want me to leave her alone, so it seems the only thing i can do is leave her for a while, i just worry about her being so lonely.
Its also very hard to know if the usually dominant personality I know, wants me to give up on her, as i am unable to speak to her. It seems communicating with me is just causing mayhem in her mind.

In that case, I'd say give her some space, but let her know that when the personality who likes you is out she can call/text/visit you. Other than that, I'm not sure what I can suggest besides waiting for her to see her therapist.

Ok well thanks for the advice Nessie. I suppose the only thing i can do is leave her alone. It just seems to heartbreaking right now, we had a great time together, and got on so well. Then when she doesnt even seem to want to talk to me, it seems we have lost everything we had built up together. I just hope that the version of her I know, is still there somewhere.

I know its not her fault though, she wants me to stay away to stop the others from making her life hell. I suppose until she has some therapy and the other alters learn to calm down, its just a matter of waiting.