Going Mad

Well after i found out on my birthday(the 14th of jan) that my mom had commited suicide, i FORCED my head to clear up so i could talk to whoever else was in my head.

I found out that there was a dude namned Patrik. Hes the nice dude who takes care of my memories so if somthing big is happening, he decides if i will remember it or not
the other one is richard and thats the dude who bottles up my anger. There is a post in anger managment explaining the anger. hes like never out, mostly in.
And then of course i still have my sane person. Me . Timothy T

Well welcome back, Tim! Sorry to hear about your mom, death always makes DID that much harder on a person.

I was about 14 when I started to become aware of my DID.. I'd been aware of voices who talked amongst themselves and to me and whom I talked to for as long as I could remember. I came across a lot of disbelief in the psychiatry-world because it was unusual to be aware of it so young, most people who found out were 30 and because of my parents playing nice weather they didn't believe I'd endured any trauma whatsoever. My intelligence and knowledgeableness didn't help either; I'd probably looked it up on the internet and wanted attention. When things went so badly wrong at home that I landed up in a fosterfamily things became different.
What I'm trying to say is: just be true to yourself and your own experiences, if people in psychiatry or around you say things to you that feel right and fit, it's fine, but don't let yourself be pushed around if they say things you simply don't recognise or feel. If you're repeatedly traumatised below the age of 8 (or was it 5?) you can develop DID as a mechanism to help you cope. From that point forward; it's simply there. At first with the extra damage psychiatry did to me after I became aware of it, being aware of it so young started to seem like a down-side. It can actually be quite an advantage though; you have more time and space to get the know the others that share your mind, why they're there, what they're function is, how you can get in touch with them, communicate in a positive way, cooperate.. And I've noticed you already began with that because you just felt by instinct how to. And that's the advantage.
Just trust yourself, don't let yourself be influenced by anything in any way, don't look up what symptoms you think you might be supposed to have to fit a certain profile, and then I mean both the DID profile as the horribly boring "just one personality" profile . Just be yoursel(f/ves), if people say things to you; take what helps you get further and throw away immediately what takes you down. Just let everything be inside you and you'll be fine.

I'm glad you came in touch with Patrick and Richard and have already learned more about how they help you. Feel welcome to write here

Nindy