scared

the forums have been unavailable for like half a week. kinda scared me, every time i tried to come here there was some message in german saying the server could not be found. im glad its back up though


im prepping for the move, and have most of my stuff allready at the parents house, just waiting for a friend to help this thursday with moving my bed and desk. the whole appt is empty otherwise though, and its triggering me. half a year ago my roomate abandond me out of fear of my DID, he called my parents and made up a story saying i pulled a gun on him, and my parents believed him before even asking me if it was true... *i died a little on the inside that day*. i came home to an empty appartment, the whole place just empty....and he wouldnt answer his phone, i had a real nervous breakdown and it was scary.....

my appt is mostly empty right now and the sight of it being so empty is triggering me to be very VERY scared. jack knows that theres nothing to be scared of, carn isnt afraid of $#%^, but i am just uncontrollably really wierd. my chest is aching, my muscles are tense, i know whats causing me to be so scared and defensive its the sight of this apt empty. and i know its nothing to be afraid of, its a good thing i will be seeing my dog daily again, and the family. but its just fear i cant control. this is a very ahrd week for me

{{{{{{{{{{{{John21}}}}}}}}}}}

Brilliant that you know what is scaring you.
Least you know what is going on, but some
days (weeks are rough) Be good to all of you.
That is so important. and know that others
here care.

Hugs to all,
Red

((((((((((((hug))))))))))))

ditto, hope you all feel safe, and nice and cozy at home real soon!

benny

I am sorry that you are having such a hard time.
thankfully you will be gone from such an immense trigger soon, and hopefully will start to feel better.
(((((John)))))
~Lark