whoah. this is me.

I am sitting here blwn away. Mystery potentially on the way to being solved. I had NO IDEA this was going on, or that it was so accurately described. For 36 years i have been wondering what the hell is wrong....why doi cut....how do i lose such massive chunks of time.....and why i don't remember ALOT of things i supposedly did.
The research seems shaky to me tho.....many diff. views here. I v'e had 17 diff dx's over the years, and none were correct, and iv'e been taking way too much of the wrong medicines. I read the post puma did and it was a description of me us, and this life....(lives)?ations of this dx?
The trauma factor....the not realizing....all fits to a t. For the first time i can remember......i fel like i might be onto a genuine solution. Read all the links......have alot of questions. What are the legal implications of this dx? How will i know for sure? CAN i know for sure? Andthe big one.....DO i WANT OR NEED to KNOW???? Somebody PLEASE talk to me about this indepth as to personal experience......treatments.....etc.
Everything.

Don't be so hasty to try and fit into this mold. Everyone in the world dissociates, DID is only one of the ways that Dissociation can impact people. If you want to get an accurate diagnosis, then find a therapist who specializes in treating complex trauma disorders. DID is often misdiagnosed by those without direct experience. I suggest contacting the ISSTD (http://www.isst-d.org/) and asking them to help you find a therapist locally.

Diagnosing any mental illness is almost as much art as it is science. There are no blood tests, and if you look up 10 different disorders online, you may meet the criteria for 8 of them on any given day. Dealing with Trauma Disorders is no different really.

already branded severe PTSD.......going to do this right.

but i swear......the D in DID is right on.

Is PTSD linked to this form of disorder?

I have dr. Matuzas as a dx. psych.......supp. he is good, but.......???

the more i read the more i need to know....thanks sean.

i may NOT be psychotic. Holy crap.

DID is very closely linked to PTSD - basically DID happens when someone experiences trauma past their limits too early and can't make sense of it. It is most definitely a Trauma Disorder.

Damn, and i was hoping they made a wrong dx. SOAB! Oh, well guess it's better than having it, and not knowing what the hell is going on! There's worse things, right?????????

benny

PTSD is very closely linked, I was diagnosed as severe PTSD before DID and I still have many of the symptoms of PTSD.
I agree with senteneal though in finding a qualified therapist for a diagnosis. Tell them what you think and why and let them help you from there. +

Been doing ALOT of reading.......and i got to thinking how Dr. Matuzas changed me from severe RC BP to Severe PTSD......he aid i was the worst case he had seen, and didn't rule out ECT as a treatment if these meds didn't work. The last two visits to my PCP she wanted me to admit vol. into the psych. ward......but i just can't.....not after all iv'e been through being taken by force from SI episodes. The trauma i went through as a kid is stuff i'll never get into too much, no one would even believe alot of it, i still can't myself. But thank you all for the kind replies......as far as fitting into this mold.....i don't have to even try, it fits like a glove.....and every word iv'e read could have been a page from my life. But we'll see what Dr. K and Dr. M. have to say of course. Alot has happenned in the last week, and just getting back home was not an easy task....but i'm here. (thank God)

glad you're safe at home.
my first dx was ptsd. then it was upped to ptsd-d. i asked her what that meant, and she said "dissociative, post tramatic stress disorder." i had know idea what she was talking about then. after moving, a divorce from a mad man, counceling for that, a few years and good marriage later, i thought it was all behind me. then my mom got alzhiemers. being an only child, she became my responsiblity. memories came pouring out of nowhere, blackouts, personalities long gone started popping up. i thought i was going nuts. went to a shrink, told him what was going on in my head, and was given a book on d.i.d.. he asked me if this was what i was experiencing, i said yes. a few sessions later i was dx with d.i.d. and sent to a specialist or (someone with at least some experience) i think he just determined it was d.i.d. and not some other dissociative disorder. it really shook me up at first. i became VERY selfconscience of the sudden switching and time lost.

communication with other multiples here on the forum has been a lifesaver. we're not crazy, in fact most of us have in higher IQ than average, and are multi-tallented as well. there are thoughs days when it's a royal pain in the ass. that's when it is so great to be able to share with people who "really" know what you're going through. it's no longer feels like a "death sentence". or the worst thing in the world. here, you're among friends and no longer alone.

peace & love
benny

In the spirit of pure human condition i have to say you guys are all above average in the nice dept. and that is something this dude doesn't get much of and it's seriously appreciated. I finally had the cajones to post what happened to me in childhood.....it took 3 damn hours of work.....i puked a few times.....then when i went to submit, it got flushed cuz i timed out....(EEEEEEYYYYAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!)
So guess we'll be waiting on that one it took alot outa me.
Man, yesterday was one f*&ked up day.....exquisitely painful and keeping a lid on that anger proved to be exausting. But coming here....talking to you guys really helps alot. I'm always usually in SI which is a huge problem 4 me. And a very serious forum.....u all know i modded in there as hardcore. Crashed and burned. Though i didn't see it that way nor did all the members. o well, whatever. I got them ALL on my IM anyway. good to see you all, been up 3 r 4 days so i'll be landing now...heh. ttys.

Welcome Deadseason!!