Mad alter

I'm saying this alter of mine is truly psychotic. And I'm thinking of putting myself in an asylum. To prevent her from hurting me though I don't know what she can do to me internally when I've had heart attacks from her in the past.

I'm not sure whether an alter can cause an event such as an heart attack, its usually a sign something is physically wrong in the body. But maybe the alter is trying to warn you something doesn't feel right but doesn't know how?

When we read back (our posts/journals) we find our system started behaving erratically right before a stroke happened in the body and it was missed because we're also going through peri-menopause and everyone was playing up due to the severe mood swings.

If you had an heart attack in the past can you get an appointment with your heart specialist to check things over?

I have, they just said it was caused by a panic attack. And heart meds would bring my blood pressure too low.

Ok tell me what you think. She started off with beating me down and degrading me verbally when she first came for over a yr. Now since I've gotten her to live in the IRL world. She is saying she's me constantly and still degrading me saying she's stronger and can do what she wants. Doesn't respond to medication, a lot of different ones. And is now on a mission of getting me fat cause sleeping at one in the morning is the thing. And it's enough sleep till eight. .,,. What she does is talk nonsense, saying why do you do what you do? When she punishes me if I do much at all. If I do yard work or read, aor games. Yet it's why don't we do anything if I think I'm giving her what she wants.

Sorry for off loading my vent on people. I don't have anyone for support emotionally. And I'm doing this on my own.

This sounds like a persecutor alter

https://did-research.org/did/alters/functions

It is long hard road you have chosen (to do this by yourself) we did it this way too its possible but it will take much longer and maybe easier if you there is anyone with professional knowledge of DID near you (assuming you don't live in the middle of nowhere miles away from a town/city etc).

Try learning abut persecutor alters and know her actions are driven by fear.

You will find ressources about persecutory alters and other ressources in the ressources thread (link in my signature).

Unfortunately she's not typical. She's not fearful of anything I'm aware of. She trys to scare me, yell and torment me it's money she wants. And she even went through the cops to try black mail some neighbors that were causing trouble with me. All she seems to act like is an entitled 2 yr old with my taste, but no sense whatsoever.

She is a typical persecutory alter and you would know if it you read the ressources.

Outside of coming here to vent about her and call her names, why do you post about her?

Panther1830 wrote:Unfortunately she's not typical. She's not fearful of anything I'm aware of. She trys to scare me, yell and torment me it's money she wants. And she even went through the cops to try black mail some neighbors that were causing trouble with me. All she seems to act like is an entitled 2 yr old with my taste, but no sense whatsoever.

It's control she wants, and fears losing that's why she tries to intimidate you and integrated your other alter you mentioned in a past post so it wouldn't then be 2 of you against her! I'm not sure how old your body is but she sounds young or immature.

You mentioned you had been in hospital before but she was worse when you got out?...did the hospital know about her when you were in there? If you decide to go back in again voluntarily then it maybe worthwhile telling them about her, or if you go to counseling.. maybe they will trigger her out and then see her for themselves..they may then know how to help? ..or alternatively if there are other alters who know she will be hiding if you go to counseling, they may instead emerge to reveal they are afraid of her or want to come out to help you etc? you may even find she didn't integrate the other alter she just wanted you to think that ...so you continue to believe she was more powerful than you and was the one in control.

Does she take control of the body or do you always have control?