Experience with the SIA Coming Home phone line?(TW)

(***trigger warning for general mention of childhood sexual abuse**)


I've just been made aware of a resource called the Survivors of Incest Anonymous Coming Home phone line, which has a full schedule of 12-step meetings by phone for people with a history of childhood sexual abuse.

Does anyone have any experience with this? I've never participated in any kind of support group or 12-step program, but I've been feeling a need for more support, and something completely anonymous like this is appealing to me. It's moderated, and seems safe.

I guess I'm just seeking reassurance or validation that this is worth considering? There was a lot of covert stuff in my childhood, but only one specific event of undeniable sexual abuse (that was forgotten about until 10 years ago), and even though I've sort of described it to the husband and to our T, it's feeling more and more like a big secret that it would help me to share.

With all the difficult stuff I've been going through with my T, there hasn't been room for my issues outside of the relationship interactions with the T, and I would like to expand my sources of support.

This was posted a while ago and I also want to respect the privacy of the group so I won't go into any specifics at all, nothing identifying.

I have attended their DID/MPD-centered sessions and it was all women besides myself, most seeming older. Everyone stays muted unless they are sharing and there's no crosstalk aka no reacting or responding to anyone besides the moderator saying "Thank you for sharing." In my opinion it made me feel lonely and sad. It might be beneficial for someone who really wants to vent but for me I came away feeling disempowered more than anything. Not a complaint towards this group, more like 12-step in general. You reach a point where you don't want the specific company of other sufferers anymore.

Some people's stories sound really off-the-walls (and I'm a pretty open-minded person) and everything in my head goes, "Oh my gosh, this person seems like they need help, like they might be in psychosis or manic or something, this sounds 0% like DID" but again, it's not that type of group, so the moderator just says "Thanks for sharing" and the next person goes. This didn't happen often but it happened enough that between this, the fact it was all mostly old women who are really suffering and it felt like 0 success stories and 100% "my life is hell" content, I stopped attending.

Thank you for responding, gavinbox!

I've attended two of the DID phone sessions, and "shared" in both of them. While it was kind of nice to be able to talk and know that people were listening, the lack of any feedback or response other than "thank you for sharing," or "you were heard," is definitely something that takes getting used to.

The ones I attended didn't have anyone that I thought was psychotic or manic, but some of the people had more "classic" DID, with overtly different alters speaking at different times. I'm much more covert, and at most I might sound younger sometimes, but I often don't even know who is fronting. The other people also sounded like they had much more difficult circumstances in their lives than I do.

I've had difficulty believing/accepting that the one instance of SA I experienced was "a big deal," and so the group's definition of incest is helpful to me, because there was a lot of covert stuff that went on in my childhood that had a big impact on me. So for me to even join a group like that at all is a good step toward acceptance. I have a weekly reminder on my phone about the meeting, so I'm sure I'll call in again sometime.

Thanks again, gavinbox, and I'm sorry it wasn't a good resource for you.