Our Life Journal Thread. :D

You did. Thank you so much. I get so defensive of my mom sometimes.

It's hard to talk about it, especially with things come to me in pieces. My mom ended up going to therapy for over 15 years, but she hasn't had any luck finding a new therapist since we moved. She believes she handles it well for the most part, and compared to the past it is better.

I need to continue reading the book, I just haven't had the drive to do it in the last few weeks. >.< I am still working on the being present stuff. It just feels like two steps forward and five back sometimes.

The loop is what's so hard. The more present I feel, the more I don't want to be, but the only way to get better and make a living is to be more present. >.<

Take your time. Focus on the aspects that are manageable right now. Sometimes the order in which the books present the things, is not the right order for us. We need to leaf through the chapter titles and focus on the ones that are accessible for us at the moment, then we can come back to the others later.

6/11/2022

Ashe (host)

Overwhelmed feeling for three days straight. Felt like I couldn't relax.

Bouncing between feeling a bubbly static feeling and dissociation.

The bubbly static feels like a spring unsnapped, coiled and ready. I feel like everything is locked. My joints, my brain, my breath. Everything takes extra energy, extra concentration. Bouncing between hyperaware and absent.