How are you all coping with the Covid pandemic?

Hey Sioux,

I think it's definitely changed stuff a bunch for us. Like most of our system has gone deep into hiding again.

And this new person has showed up, Cindy. I still don't really know how to describe her or what to think of her. From my PoV she's like a fictional character, out of a book / story. From her PoV she's a real person from a real place, like an alternate Earth or another dimension or something. And she misses her friends and family and wants to go back home.

In the meantime she's fronting more and more here. It's good in a way because she isn't as upset about the pandemic stuff. It doesn't bother her as much because it's not her world, and she's confident she'll be able to go back home eventually. So it keeps the body more calm and stuff when she's fronting. I can only take so much of this before I start freaking out & stuff, so I guess its good we have someone who can stay calm thorugh this stuff?

The downside is she doesn't know how to do our work and has absolutely no interest in learning. So when she's fronting, she spends her time watching movies, listening to music, talking to a friend she made online, and trying to figure out how to get back home. She got herself a notebook where she's like tracking her observations and progress and all that stuff. :/

Viola

Amythyst wrote:Hey Sioux,

I think it's definitely changed stuff a bunch for us. Like most of our system has gone deep into hiding again.

And this new person has showed up, Cindy. I still don't really know how to describe her or what to think of her. From my PoV she's like a fictional character, out of a book / story. From her PoV she's a real person from a real place, like an alternate Earth or another dimension or something. And she misses her friends and family and wants to go back home.

In the meantime she's fronting more and more here. It's good in a way because she isn't as upset about the pandemic stuff. It doesn't bother her as much because it's not her world, and she's confident she'll be able to go back home eventually. So it keeps the body more calm and stuff when she's fronting. I can only take so much of this before I start freaking out & stuff, so I guess its good we have someone who can stay calm thorugh this stuff?

The downside is she doesn't know how to do our work and has absolutely no interest in learning. So when she's fronting, she spends her time watching movies, listening to music, talking to a friend she made online, and trying to figure out how to get back home. She got herself a notebook where she's like tracking her observations and progress and all that stuff. :/

Viola

She sounds like Lilly. Lilly went. I'm not entirely sure why. I think it might have been pressure from the ex bf who decided not to isolate and we did. I don't think she could handle his nonsense. Oh no, I just saw what caused her to leave. She sort of hallucinated and then got disorientated and left.

I hope Cindy works out for you. If she's creating calm in the body then it's good.

Amythyst wrote:Hey Sioux,

I think it's definitely changed stuff a bunch for us. Like most of our system has gone deep into hiding again.

And this new person has showed up, Cindy. I still don't really know how to describe her or what to think of her. From my PoV she's like a fictional character, out of a book / story. From her PoV she's a real person from a real place, like an alternate Earth or another dimension or something. And she misses her friends and family and wants to go back home.

In the meantime she's fronting more and more here. It's good in a way because she isn't as upset about the pandemic stuff. It doesn't bother her as much because it's not her world, and she's confident she'll be able to go back home eventually. So it keeps the body more calm and stuff when she's fronting. I can only take so much of this before I start freaking out & stuff, so I guess its good we have someone who can stay calm thorugh this stuff?

The downside is she doesn't know how to do our work and has absolutely no interest in learning. So when she's fronting, she spends her time watching movies, listening to music, talking to a friend she made online, and trying to figure out how to get back home. She got herself a notebook where she's like tracking her observations and progress and all that stuff. :/

Viola

That's interesting. Somewhere in your systems subconscious must be a worry existing alters or the one up front will struggle to cope so Cindy has 'appeared'. It makes sense to us who feel we have an 'original self' somewhere in there and all alters were created to protect them.

Trigger Warning******(talk of death)******

Ever since this covid-19 started happened. I'm concerned for my littles. I'm really worried about them dying. I know we all would but I worry about them. Is that weird?

Rive wrote:Trigger Warning******(talk of death)******

Ever since this covid-19 started happened. I'm concerned for my littles. I'm really worried about them dying. I know we all would but I worry about them. Is that weird?

No not really. I've had all sorts happen because of adult trauma. This time is like a trauma. So I don't think it's weird. I think perhaps you're transfering your fear of death onto the littles instead of owning it but I don't think it's weird at all.

Do you mean Rive (or any of us) are interpreting the fear as having come from others instead of acknowledging we ourselves have it? Sometimes I interpret an emotion or sentiment as coming from someone else rather than realizing, wait, no, this is at least partly, maybe entirely, my emotions, thoughts, etc.

I also notice that sometimes I have a fear about something, or just do an "imagine the worst" exercise, and by virtue of the fact that I mulled it over, built up images of catastrophe in my head, thought of dire consequence of something I did, it was picked up on by young alters, who then reacted. That has happened so many times I've had to curb my habit of going to the dark thoughts because they would regularly terrify younger alters, which was clearly wrong and abusive.

It's kind of like I don't look at it as just me anymore. I'm not as careless or unconcerned about things as I used to be because I feel it's my duty to protect them. I didn't know if that was abnormal because they are and were there to protect me.

I worry about what would happen to the dog if the body got it and we had to go to hospital on a ventilator or we died. what happens to the stuff in the house? especially if family had already passed before us.

Would someone find our journal? should we delete everything mentioning multiple personalities incase we were affected first and family found it? (They know we have Autism and physical health problems but we've never officially been diagnosed DID as we've always kept 'the others' a secret).

Last night we were tossing and turning so was exhausted having to drag ourselves out of bed at 5 am to get up and walk the dog, eventually a message seemed to come from within that we should do a little bit of sorting everyday into boxes as if we were moving house. If we get it, everything is sorted making it easier for family, if we don't the house is at least tidier and as soon as its safe we could get decoraters in (as it badly needs repainting) then put things back out again.

It would also give us something else to focus on if the lock down goes on for months over summer, between that, looking after the dog and Kit and Bobby getting lost in video games we should be able to make it through the other side without too many other mental health issues (assuming we manage to avoid physical symptoms from it)

I don't want to know any numbers (that have died) Kit thinks we should at least keep a check on local cases so we know how exactly how careful we need to be about not seeing others on our walks or answering the door. We don't live near any major cities thankfully but as has already been shown on TV some city folk are coming out to more rural areas to second homes/stay with family etc to escape the risks in bigger cities and are potentially bringing it with them infecting locals.

There's too much actual work in "work from home."

Laura and others

Basically everything is the same just less stressful. However, our host Maria is currently visiting her parents for 2 weeks during all this. It is a lot less tiresome now that we are away from her roommate who has a delusional mind set. Maria has been doing German notes all day and studying so she can talk to her boyfriend and his parents in German. One of our newest members Candice has been helping her memorize her notes. Anyway I'll keep this post short since there isn't really much else to talk about.~Justin