Accused of Being Demon Possessed

IainEtc wrote:Lots of folks out there can't deal with the way we are. They pressure us to be like them. Accusing us of being crazy or demons or other sh*t is because they can't handle reality. Hate it when they do that to our face. But it's their sh*t not ours. This isn't about you Zor. Just a couple of weak people needing power and willing to hurt people to get it. An old story. Nothing wrong with you guys.

Stay strong.

Colin

Thanks! You are a blessing to us!

{\Pixie/}

IainEtc wrote:There's like a blast radius around people who end up alone after they run everybody off. They kind of blow up and do crazy stuff. Don't be standing too close ok? They try to take you down with them.

Iain

Yeah, and when he like left the church the first time (before we were "outed") it caused this effect... he was nuclear going off and causing a ton of problems. Then again when they were rejected from "taking over" things (months AFTER we were gone and cuz of things THEY did).

We have seen it happen at least 2-3 times with S specifically... and now S & B are super tight and totally wrapped up in each other's business like that, so....

{\Pixie/}

Hi,

Ok so we got like super mad about this whole thing (not with Zor and Pixie - with the people who are hurting them and everybody else with the stupid 'demon possessed' stuff). When we're like this our T tells us to write a letter just for ourselves with all the stuff we want to say. So me and Colin did. It's just us venting ok? Maybe it will help other people who are mad too.

Of course if Zor wants to send it to them that's ok with us

Our letter... (TW? Maybe?) -------------------------

Dear Sh*t-for-brains #1 and #2,

Your using my faith to F- with me is getting really old. Got to admit it's some seriously efficient sh*t jacking up both my recovery and my faith at the same time. (Are you working on a Evil First Class merit badge or something?) In case you didn't get the memo - hurting people for power is what evil is all about. Whether you ever understand this or not I'm done standing around while you practice this sh*t on me and my wife. Stop it now.

Bottom line - I'm done talking to you. Right now I'm too involved loving all my parts - including the Littles - to give a f*ck about what you think. If you don't like that check Jesus's words for what happens when you mess with kids and God and love - even inside kids.

I sure hope Jesus loves you because you are irritating the F*CK out of me.

Sincerely,

Someone who wishes you'd grow the F- up!

PS - If I ever have to talk to you again about this I won't be half as nice.

--------------------------------

Iain (for humor), Colin (for strength), and Morgan (for words)

IainEtc wrote:I sure hope Jesus loves you because you are irritating the F*CK out of me.

OHMYGOSH! BEST LINE EVER! ROFLMBO

IainEtc wrote:Iain (for humor), Colin (for strength), and Morgan (for words)

Thank you, all of you! <3 We love you! **hugs**

{\Pixie/}

-- Sat Aug 24, 2019 9:59 am --

That letter was brilliant!

Thank you Iain, Colin, and Morgan!

You're welcome.

We really want to support you guys.
We're all in the same fight.

Iain & Colin

So on the way home from dinner with some friends (who were following us to the house), B calls and wants to drop by b/c he is "in the area". My wife tells him sure... fortunately no big deal in the end, he left before the others did, so no "drama" or BS from him... but it had us on guard, it actually caused Pixie to be present a while until we felt safe...


But talking with my wife about these things, B specifically and his BS claims... she can accept that some of them were lies, the three rumors that no one has heard of... that the "Pixie said plainly..." comment I can't find ANY sign of in their chat and she didn't say it "might not have been said"... and that he lies about little things sometimes... and that she admits he WAS manipulative, even likely intentionally, but scoffed that that was "abusive" when I said so. She said that was b/c sometimes you need to see an emotional response to really read people. BS. He did it HOURS BEFORE that "talk" to cause stress... and she SCOFFED almost laughed at the idea of it being emotional abuse. Despite that I literally said, "If he did it on purpose, he was knowingly manipulating me in a way he knew he could to create a vulnerable situation to exploit it. What else could you call that?!"

Despite ALL THAT... she STILL says she thinks he "might not be entirely wrong" (as if there's "partially right" about this?!)! :O

And she said "If you make me choose between Pixie and B, she'll lose." I flatly and sharply told her _I_ am not the one trying to force a choice, HE IS.

But what bugs me about that is Pixie is part of me, we're one... B is OUTSIDE of both ME/US and my wife and I "us". And it hurt that she'd take HIS WORD on that, on MY mental state and how we all exist MORE than MY WORD.

We need to have a talk again later, thankfully I see my T this Tuesday... I NEED to talk to him after this. I am scared there's almost a litmus test within our relationship to where anything I might say has to be compared to B and HIS opinions and judgment... that puts HIM in a position of greater authority in my marriage than ME... and that's dangerous.

Hi Zor, Paul and Karen here, your wife doesn't like pixie and said it's possible you're demon possessed and doesn't think B saying that "should" upset you? Karen

For times sake I'm gonna guess Karen was right in her summary. This is what I would say to your wife:

So you're saying you would pick an outside person over me in this? Pixie is part of me, part of the man you're married to and a third party is more important than the man you married. (she'll probably try to interrupt here and defend herself with responses such as "I didn't marry pixie" or you're putting a part of yourself before me" or some other nonsense that's emotive and defends her clear lack of loyalty to you as a whole person) I wouldn't let her and I'd move on to the next important point by simply saying: no, you're picking an outside guy over your husband, I'm not splitting hairs with you because worse than that...

You believe it's possible I'm demon possessed. You believe pixie is possibly a demon. If I'm demon possessed why didn't you when this first appeared as a problem in our marriage march me straight down to the nearest priest and demand an exorcism? She'll probably mock this and call you stupid or something similar. Or she may, if she's pathological, attempt to call your bluff and say let's go to a priest then.. here's your next opportunity to bring back to being about this guy.. I'd say :

No, no, you don't get to back track. You're saying this after B has said it. You're saying you agree with B and I should be exorcised. That it's probably demons. That we're in the 1600's and I'm a demon and if we're in the 1600s then you'd be on a ducking stall for being a nagging wife. It's fine, I'll go get a priest while you get flogged. This is the type of marriage you want? One where an outside guy insults your husband, you take his words and then have the gall to say your pick him over me? I'm a demon though so I suppose it makes sense, are you going to put that on the divorce application "accidentally married demon so I need a divorce" You don't even realise how disloyal and ridiculous you're being.

But I shouldn't be upset? I shouldn't be upset that my wife is choosing another man over me and she thinks I'm possessed by demons, I should be happy about that. If I said you're fat but you're not fat and then you get upset it's ok because you "shouldn't" get upset? Is that what you're saying? You're saying that B or me or anyone can say any upsetting thing to you and it's ok as long as they didn't mean to upset you because that means "you shouldn't get upset?" So the next time Pixie upsets you I'll just point out "you shouldn't be upset" because you seem to think people "should" only be upset if the other person decids that so next time when pixie upsets you I'll just remind you "you shouldn't be upset" and tell you I'm picking the next door neighbor over you because the next door neighbor is more important than my wife and my marriage.

People with your wife's way of thinking, where they blame entirely one person, take alot of arguing with to be brought back to reality so without having her saying anything back I wouldn't be able to know what twists and turns she'll throw at you. In debating that's called "a red herring" she'll throw in red herrings to throw you off track. In an argument like this it'd probably be emotional red herrings. If you want to get your point across you need to stick to your points and whatever she says keep coming back to them: 1.an outside person is picked over you, 2. she thinks you could be demon possessed and 3. apparently she decides when and what should upset you.

I wouldn't let any of this drop until she's sees what's wrong with that whole picture. Other parts of me could not argue their way out of a paper bag but we was recently in hospital which usually takes a degree of debate to try to stop doctors forcing antipsychotics down our throats so here I am. I don't know if you'd be able to debate with your wife over her views. I always look at it as a debate rather than an argument because it cuts out emotions and you're arguing a point not arguing with a person. If you cannot stand up to your wife and argue your side then I wish you much luck just the same. Debating is a skill though and you can learn it and you can think and plan out your side if necessary before talking to her. The main thing is to stick to your points and avoid red herrings. Before I was fully back if the others got into a discussion and it got heated I would just shout out "red herring" if the other person was trying to take them off track. It's the most important thing to look for because you don't want to be at the end of the conversation thinking I didn't get any of my points across. Paul

Relationships are difficult when you have different personalities because it's very unlikely they all like the same person and your wife isn't going to like every part of you. She doesn't have to like pixie to be loyal to her though. Karen

Blessings, Karen and Paul

Pixie and Zor and all the rest are a package deal. A wife who would choose B over Pixie needs to be in no doubt that "cherry picking" is not an option, so she is also choosing B over Zor.

Zor, she may not fully understand this. She may be imagining she can cherry pick the parts of you she engages with.

Despite ALL THAT... she STILL says she thinks he "might not be entirely wrong" (as if there's "partially right" about this?!)! :O

What? Like only a part of you is possessed? Or maybe by only part of a demon? Like "Honey my big toe is possessed by the nose of a demon"? (Pretty smelly for the demon)

And she said "If you make me choose between Pixie and B, she'll lose." I flatly and sharply told her _I_ am not the one trying to force a choice, HE IS."

Good reply. But oh man that sucks! Rough thing to hear from your wife. Hang in there Pixie. You're still important.

Just an idea. Maybe too nosy. Just thinking maybe your wife doesn't like it that Pixie is a girl. I mean since she's married to you she's married to Pixie too. Kind of like "OMG I'm kissing a girl!" Maybe this isn't exactly about demons.

Colin & Iain

I am really coming to appreciate that what I would do in Zor's particular situation isn't necessarily relevant, although my observations may be. Zor and crew have been open to feedback, other perspectives and opinions, and they're getting plenty of that.

What I keep thinking about is that we're all reading your summary of what has happened, and this is already a truncated representation of all sorts of details, like your past and current interactions with your wife and others outside of this issue. If we were there to witness it all, we might have a different take.

I used to talk to my T about how my adopted son would drive me crazy sometimes, triggering the heck out of me with all the aggressiveness and defiant behavior. But I was focusing on the worst stuff that upset me, not all the wonderful loving moments we shared nor the promise I made early to him that I would never kick him out, no matter what. The T suggested I should ask him to leave but that was just never an option. And I'm glad it wasn't. That has a parallel with a marriage vow and, for many, there's something sacred about that which overrides other stuff.

As to your wife's responses to date, I like your point about being very frustrated by it but you're not so willing to be quick to give up on years of a marriage. Some people evolve, some don't, and it's your life choice what to do with that. Chances are she will because that's more normal than never changing.

Colin and Iain's point about whether there may be an alter gender issue beneath it all is an astute one. There's also the reality that people changing in virtually any significant way may push buttons for some friends, work colleagues, family, or spouses.

Una+ wrote:Pixie and Zor and all the rest are a package deal. A wife who would choose B over Pixie needs to be in no doubt that "cherry picking" is not an option, so she is also choosing B over Zor.

Zor, she may not fully understand this. She may be imagining she can cherry pick the parts of you she engages with.

That is MY view, too. Pixie is part of me, period. There's no "choosing" me apart from her (or any of the others). Whether she (or I) knew it at the time we married, it was ALL OF US... So she needs to accept that, or just make a decision she CAN'T or won't... so we can address that and how to move forward. It's NOT realistic to believe there is an end result of me without them.

I think she doesn't want to accept it. She's said before (even recently) that "if you address what caused them, there's no reason for them to exist. So they can just *poof* go away." I have tried to tell her it does NOT work that way.