Hello. New and have questions

Hello. I just recently have considered that I may have DID and have spent the last several weeks researching and combing the internet for information on it. I feel like I learned all that I can from articles on the internet, but found this place. I saw another recent thread where a new person posted in a similar situation as me and seeing it made me feel encouraged that I might be able to find some information here too. It seems like a friendly place here.

I was watching random Youtube videos once a couple months back and came across a DID vlog. I watched it out of curiosity and was extremely shocked to find most of the things the person in the video spoke about experiencing as a normal occurance for them, as DID traits, were things I also find normal for myself! I had spent my life since a young age believing these experiences were due to "spirit guides" or "invisible friends" (the normal kind kids make up) since i was raised religious. I have had a traumatic childhood (don't worry i won't say more) and exhibit most of the traits of DID.

Well, what i am wanting to know is more information about fluidity and co-consciousness.. I watched a video of a DID person shopping co-conscious with two personalities out front and how they all talk to him in his head and i deal with that SO much every day.. but i'm a little confused about some things. I've never given any of my other personalities any names, and none of them have ever claimed to be anyone but myself. Is this usual for DID or normal? Also, i can't really tell when someone slips in to front (i have had instances where i felt like suddenly my hands are doing something i can't make them stop doing or won't do something i want them to do. or my whole body for that matter) or when switches occur. I HAVE had an amnesia switch or two but they are extremely rare. Most of the time it's just suddenly my whole personality changes so fluidly and seamlessly. Is this also usual or normal for DID?

How does co-consciousness work? How normal is fluidity in co-consciousness and DID? How does THAT work? Why can't i tell how many personalities I have? And why do some of them seem similar to others to the point i can't tell who is fronting or how many are fronting? is THAT normal? Some of them are distinctly different while others are not.

There is a type OSDD1 where alters can be versions of your self at different ages and only one may be up front for years.

http://did-research.org/comorbid/dd/osd ... _osdd.html

-- Tue Jul 30, 2019 7:50 am --

There is a type OSDD1 where alters can be versions of your self at different ages and only one may be up front for years.

http://did-research.org/comorbid/dd/osd ... _osdd.html

Hi and welcome. Don't have energy to write a lot right now, so I'll just give a link that answers some of your questions. Shortly, it's all normal in DID. There's million different ways to switch or blend and systems are unique. Sometimes when you do get aware you are truly separate, things change, and they may wanna have their own names although didn't before, because didn't know it's possible. Or it can be OSDD1a where parts are different versions of same person, but you said some are very different from you, then it's maybe not that. And it doesn't really matter. Cause is the same, treatment is the same.

Video about switches: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfCFplQn_vE. This is useful channel otherwise too, if you like to watch YouTube.

I had the same experience you do. I found a forum for people with trauma, and realized that all that I thought was just my personality, was in fact symptoms of dissociation. It opened my eyes and changed my life. Because of it we're in much better place now than we were then, couple of years ago.

Thank you! The Youtuber you linked to is actually the very one I happened upon in the beginning of my journey! I also watch her friend system's channel some too. TeamPinata. Theirs is who I also was referring to. I LOVE their channels and their people! I actually follow them.

Also, thank you for linking to that specific video. I actually vaguely remember watching it and some specific words she uses and talking about gears, I remember just enough to know I watched it before.. but I feel like i'm hearing the information for the first time. I didn't remember the information itself or concepts.. and feel like i'm hearing it for the first time.

Geeze, if it was another part of me (alter?) that watched it before.. does that mean i'm going to have to watch all of them more than once??
I'll have another look through her videos to see if any more of my questions can be answered.

It did answer some of my questions. I still feel like I don't understand myself as well as i'd like. I hope nobody minds if I hang around here in this forum a little bit longer.

I definitely feel a lot of blurriness and bleeding and it's SO confusing. I also am realizing I have more memory lapses than I believed. Everyone always tells me I have a bad memory, but i've always argued against that and said I have an excellent memory! I feel like it's stronger than most average people's in fact.

Most of the time it's little things that I forget, I don't forget where I am or how I got there.. but for example when I was showering yesterday I suddenly had a "brainfart" and forgot what I was doing. I didn't remember if I washed my hair or not yet, when I looked down at my hands and they had shampoo soap on them but my hair wasn't suds-ed up.. I washed my hair just to be safe. I have a feeling I probably shampooed my hair twice yesterday.

"Brainfarts" happen ALL the time and they're disorienting. They can be followed by a change of "personality" all of a sudden, or not. But I don't forget EVERYTHING, like I still know where I am and how I got there. Do you think this could be caused by disassociating?

My brain farts troughout the hole day

Allcoulors wrote:My brain farts troughout the hole day

LOL TY for that laugh X3

Kittie885 wrote:Thank you! The Youtuber you linked to is actually the very one I happened upon in the beginning of my journey! I also watch her friend system's channel some too. TeamPinata. Theirs is who I also was referring to. I LOVE their channels and their people! I actually follow them.

That is DissociaDID, one of my favs. Another good ones is Multiplicity and Me (find their channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8JDIE ... meo1OwI0DA ).

Some of our first exposure to like other ppl in our situation was also DissociaDID.

{\Pixie/}