Hi, new here...

I have not yet been diagnosed but I am showing symptoms and such as that of a person with DID. I came here searching for some people who may understand what I'm going through. It's a rollercoaster and most people dont believe me when I tell them about these things. Like today I'm laying down and I get the sudden urge to draw. I've always been very artsy. So I get to it, but then my brain starts jumbling and the drawing ends up as like two different people in one? Like one side looks more masculine and the other more feminine. I was working on the feminine side no problem. Yet getting to the other side I'm drawing away and kept erasing because it just wasnt turning out right. I was talking to myself the whole time like "No, this isnt right." "I HAVE to do it more like this" I was set on having the drawing the same all throughout but it's just like my body wouldnt let me. The whole time I had a slight headache. Also is it weird to feel like different names click with you..? Like they just stick for some reason, before you've even ever had an alter appear (couldnt think of a better word) with that name?.. I'm still super new with this so I have absolutely no idea about any of this...I apologize in advance if this just sounds like nonsensical rambling...

Welcome to the forum. You can read a lot of posts on here and see what you relate to. That helped me a lot when I was first figuring things out. It's good to just stay curious and observe what happens, and finding a good therapist is important, because they can help you sort things out.

Oh I definitely plan to find a therapist! Hoping all goes well and they dont tell me that I'm just crazy and it's all in my head

Well, it kind of IS all in your head... But I know what you mean.

Sorry, it came out the wrong way! I meant as in they think im faking it or just overreacting

Honestly, if you get that kind of reaction from a therapist, I would just get up and walk out. A T’s job is to validate and accept your experience, and to help you sort it out.

That's true. Hopefully all goes well...I just want this sorted out. I'm tired of feeling I have no control over myself whatsoever and feeling as though theres something wrong with me and I dont know what..

Welcome

Thank all of you for welcoming me

Hello.

This forum was very helpful to us when I found it at the beginning of our journey. And we still turn to it in times of chaotic crisis.

When we were finishing our Bachelor's degree, K (the host) would look back over her class notes while studying and could tell when a switch had taken place in class, or when someone else had moved to the front and pushed her aside a bit and she didn't realize it.

So if that happened to us while writing, then I am sure it could happen during drawing as well. Perhaps more than one of you is an artist, and two artists were vying for control.

D