Connecting

So like "homework"- yeah a totally hard thing to do sometimes... But we've found the T only gives us that kinda thingy when he thinks it's gonna like seriously help us... or truly hopes it well.

So like the time thingy, I try and help keep him aware of time, too- like telling him if someone was here and who and how long (if I know, I don't always know anymore like I once did )

But the book ALSO helps keep us like organized, cuz between all of us, we'd forget stuff all the time cuz like one of us would mean to do something or be asked to... and others of us wouldn't know, and this way EVERYONE can look at that and be like "oh, this needs to be done and isn't X marked as done" so they can do it or let others have time to do it. So super helpful for us.

{\Pixie/}

Pixie - we have started using a bullet journal very close to yours for our daily tasks and it is helpful. The other one we do for T is we say who is out or we suspect is out as we still don't always know, then the amount of time lost around, then where like home or where ever, then if something stood out (usually feeling and it has to be told to us by partner generally because otherwise we really have to listen to body and sometimes it just doesn't work).

Yes, we agree T homework is usually for a good reason .... but sometimes we don't want to be triggered and do it Yesterday we did not get far with it but there was a start so that was okay. It is just one of our hardest ones lately.

Glad you stopped in Pixie and hope to see you around the boards I always get something from the things you and Zor share. Thank you!

hbodhi wrote:Pixie - we have started using a bullet journal very close to yours for our daily tasks and it is helpful. The other one we do for T is we say who is out or we suspect is out as we still don't always know, then the amount of time lost around, then where like home or where ever, then if something stood out (usually feeling and it has to be told to us by partner generally because otherwise we really have to listen to body and sometimes it just doesn't work).

Yes, we agree T homework is usually for a good reason .... but sometimes we don't want to be triggered and do it Yesterday we did not get far with it but there was a start so that was okay. It is just one of our hardest ones lately.

Glad you stopped in Pixie and hope to see you around the boards I always get something from the things you and Zor share. Thank you!

Awww, thank you. We'll totally try and be around regularly. It's nice to have ppl that like understand and we can be like open with and stuff. We don't have much of that at all right now, so every one of you are super super important and precious to us.

{\Pixie/}

I don't have a journal. I used to but it caused too much discord and turned into an argument on paper that'd last for weeks instead of talking internally which takes mins. Sometimes I talk to myself out loud.

I have colouring books which I draw in. Child alters draw in. And there's a couple of silly rymes I wrote in it. The twins have their own language and they wrote themselves a note once. I couldn't read it, nobody else in my system could read it. It was not any usual world alphabet, it wasn't code, it was their own written language. That was a few weeks ago. They hadn't written a whole page like thar before. Usually if I'm doodling a couple of those symbols would be there but they look like patterns. Once they'd done whatever it was they needed a reminder to do, I think it was an outline of a plan but I don't remember what it was regarding, they threw the note. I don't keep a list of things to do etc, I do what I call "fly by the seat of my pants"
I did want to keep a journal for a while but the twins said "taking notes is for amateurs" they're big headed and have no concept of how keeping notes or any kind of journal would be helpful. They like organised chaos, they call it. Outside people have commented on how "organised" I am. I don't see myself that way but I suppose I must be to run a house with four children, go to study, and now full time work over the last 18 years. I must be really "organised" but I don't see myself like that at all. Probably because I have crazy delusional twins who are currently waiting for "the devil" to show up whatever that means - that on its own is enough to make a person doubt themselves on every level.

If a journal is helpful that's good. Alot of people use them. I'm pretty sure if I tried to write one it'd end up in the twins own language and I'd never be able to read it myself because they banned journallling about 9-10 years ago after it caused long drawn out internal arguments between my parts.

Also its great to to read therapy is really helping you. I'm terrified to go back to therapy but my current internal state may require it. Much luck and blessings.

Sarandipity wrote:I don't have a journal. I used to but it caused too much discord and turned into an argument on paper that'd last for weeks instead of talking internally which takes mins. Sometimes I talk to myself out loud.

I have colouring books which I draw in. Child alters draw in. And there's a couple of silly rymes I wrote in it. The twins have their own language and they wrote themselves a note once. I couldn't read it, nobody else in my system could read it. It was not any usual world alphabet, it wasn't code, it was their own written language. That was a few weeks ago. They hadn't written a whole page like thar before. Usually if I'm doodling a couple of those symbols would be there but they look like patterns. Once they'd done whatever it was they needed a reminder to do, I think it was an outline of a plan but I don't remember what it was regarding, they threw the note. I don't keep a list of things to do etc, I do what I call "fly by the seat of my pants"
I did want to keep a journal for a while but the twins said "taking notes is for amateurs" they're big headed and have no concept of how keeping notes or any kind of journal would be helpful. They like organised chaos, they call it. Outside people have commented on how "organised" I am. I don't see myself that way but I suppose I must be to run a house with four children, go to study, and now full time work over the last 18 years. I must be really "organised" but I don't see myself like that at all. Probably because I have crazy delusional twins who are currently waiting for "the devil" to show up whatever that means - that on its own is enough to make a person doubt themselves on every level.

If a journal is helpful that's good. Alot of people use them. I'm pretty sure if I tried to write one it'd end up in the twins own language and I'd never be able to read it myself because they banned journallling about 9-10 years ago after it caused long drawn out internal arguments between my parts.

Also its great to to read therapy is really helping you. I'm terrified to go back to therapy but my current internal state may require it. Much luck and blessings.

I started a journal as something of a diary and a place to pour out emotions when I was first discovering the others were part of me. I was hurt by how it was revealed, the reaction of so-called brothers and sisters, loved ones, and overwhelmed by it all. It was a natural refuge for me to write.
I was sort of surprised when Pixie first wrote in there on her own to communicate- even though I'd mentioned wishing we could communicate and I think even asking them to. I think maybe part of me (ME, not another) thought it was just wishful thinking or something that couldn't and wouldn't happen... IDK.

Since then communication has increased with her to a point I can sometimes hear her inside talking to me while I am out and doing things, talking to people, whatnot. That's a welcome progress for us. Others have written a handful of times, some more than a few... so it's been beneficial to us.

BUT like all practices, grounding techniques, or activities... if it doesn't help, it's not required, and if it's harmful absolutely stop. If it caused us the kind of discord and pain you're describing, I wouldn't be doing it either.

As for therapy... Our T is pretty laid back and generally lets us talk about what we will. He'll ask about things we bring up, gently steer the topic of discussion once in a while with leading questions to get us to open up (if we want to - he has NEVER pressed us to do that) about some things... and he's been willing to listen to others, Pixie and Kaitie-Lynn (Kitten) have both talked to him (Pixie several times now). He's been willing to talk to them and address their concerns and fears, even if he's still considering me a primary and "the one that should be in control" (we're still trying to sort out how we all feel about that and if it's how WE want it to be- that will be a very long process to come to a solution that we all agree on, I'm thinking).

So I hope that if you DO go back, that it's helpful to you... I know it has been for us.