Feeling More Aligned

When I came here just a few months ago I was "all over the place" DID wise.

As I've said I'd had alot of various therapies and was living, building a life a love, without medication for a number of years.

The sociopath "relationship" had drawn all of my parts out. He'd pushed, pulled, triggered and caused reasonably near to a breakdown. Then as "the twins" woke up I started a new job and had very confusing feelings about the guy who possibly has DID who I work with.

So stress of being around an emotionally and psychologically abusive person, stress of a new job, confusing feelings and feeling bad about them. And it was chaos.

Slowly I've been feeling more centralised. More stable. Less switches caused by outside stimulase. More aligned internally. More back to my mentally healthy feeling state. Which may not be considered healthy to others but it's how I am and I progress in life, live a full life like this so that's what I see as important.

And as Thegangsallhere pointed out for Dissociative Identity to be a disorder it has to be causing life upset - which it was again relatively briefly - but it's not now. I feel more at peace within myself.

All of you, whether replying to my posts or posting stuff and I read it have very much helped me through the crisis I was having. There were points where I was worried I was going to end up hospitalised. Points where I thought I was gonna be stuck being what I call "overly aware of parts" and with "the twins messing with me" but it's all calmed down and all of you helped alot with that so:

THANK YOU ALL LOADS AND LOADS. There's not a great emojis option but I'd post flowers and fireworks if I could.

I aim to still pop on here, I don't know if I'm saying useful stuff to you all but that's always my aim, good intent but hopefully won't be posting my own stuff much because internally I seem to be calm and getting calmer.

The upside of this last mini crisis is that "the twins" are with us not "subconscious" as they call it and that I feel like I want to get a divorce - separated for years but couldn't face a divorce because it felt too painful and triggering. But the feeling of "I want a divorce. I'm getting a divorce" is finally there.

Anyway THANK YOU ALL (that's my main point) you all helped alot when I needed it most and I aim to still be able to maybe be helpful to all of you - I don't know if I'm always helpful because I have different way of dealing with being multiple it seems sometimes. Mostly I don't see it as a negative being the major difference but I think that's because my multiplicity seems to come out in abuse situations since I had all the therapy.

Wanted to let you all know that I'm feeling much better and to say thank-you.

THANK YOU

I am glad that you are feeling better. I hope that it continues

-Purple Haze

I'm glad to hear you are feeling much better. We all are glad! Like Purple Haze said- I hope it continues.