Positivity Thread

We didn't stay in bed like we've been doing on most Sundays. It's been a very difficult habit to break because of all the baggage involved. But we forgot to get Snapple and Diet Coke when we went grocery shopping yesterday, so we knew we had to do it today. We got up at a little before 1pm and did what we had to do.

MDs

We had a good day.
Like 75 percent good, but still a lot of anxiety.
I realized I had been neglecting the littles and to make it up we went to a dinosaur museum.
And then they got to pick a small present, but it had to be without plastic, because I get seriously worried about the environment sometimes. They picked pokemon cards.

It is difficult for me to have good days, so I count this as a win.

So a positivity thing...

POSSIBLE Trigger warning (video game with violence mentioned)

I got to play online with some understanding friends in "Dead by Daylight" last night for the first time. They know what's going on and Pixie chimes in sometimes and takes over to chat, too- she got to play a few rounds after I had played about an hour.

It was great for both of us to have some sort of group activity (even if only via the internet) with people that know, and don't care and don't get freaked out over it. It was a lot of fun, even if we did get slaughtered in every round we played in (which is about par for the course actually for that game). BUT we BOTH had a ton of fun. A total win.

I bought Jules a football from the store today. We left the bus earlier we would've needed, and walked thru little road, which is not meant for cars, then thru graveled road and in the end thru little forest on paths, with kicking the ball all the way.

I'm old enough to not care what people think about me, if I wanna carry a ball rather by kicking it than actually carrying it, it's my business, also when we're not that good at it yet.

It was fun. I don't think I would find that fun, or maybe I can when there's no one judging, but Jules certainly did.

We have a large playing field for sports close to us, and I thought we can go there to kick some ball sometimes. It's very large, and there's usually no one there, but even if there wold be, you can still use another part of it, because it's huge. We don't have anyone to play with, but we're gonna learn how to work the ball, how to make it go where we want to, the way we want to. But now I found out by accident that taking it to a forest paths is way more difficult and therefor more fun. So we're gonna go to the forest to play football. Well, not play football, but just move around with it. It's rocky in there and a lot of ups and downs. Once we know how to make it thru all the hard paths in there, we certainly can make it go where we want to on a smooth, flat area.

So, we invented new sports. It's called forest ball, and we already have rules how to do it. Best part is, you don't have to be part of the team in order to play it.

Theia was singing a song so I thought I would share.

https://youtu.be/QVheldiO8CU

Translation:

Remember, was it may, november, here or there? Was it a monday? I only remember a neverending wall but we were together and together we went above it.

Come back from your faraway travels, come back to me, everything adds something to my life. I need our roads to cross, when time gathers us, together everything is prettier.

https://i.chzbgr.com/full/9352378624/hAAA64FA8/

(Link goes to a picture of a Taco-selling place with a sign reading: It's OK if you fall appart sometimes, tacos fall appart and we still love them)

Floralie wrote:So, we invented new sports. It's called forest ball

Can we thank Jules for coming up with forest ball? Many of us love, love, love walking and hiking in the woods and some of us around his age, especially Luke and Brody, now want to bring a ball and try that.

Johnny-Jack wrote:

Floralie wrote:So, we invented new sports. It's called forest ball

Can we thank Jules for coming up with forest ball? Many of us love, love, love walking and hiking in the woods and some of us around his age, especially Luke and Brody, now want to bring a ball and try that.

Thank you, he came closer to front when he saw this and was very happy about it. He has not been out or played anything after our crisis started, but this made him very happy. Happy enough he wanted to read a bit one of the books we got for him from the library before, although he has been feeling really bad.

I've felt for longer time now parts are further away from me than before. They stopped coming and going in and out of the body with co-consciousness, I felt like my mind was closed somehow. But now something has happened, my mind feels open again and I feel them differently than I did awhile ago. Now I'm back in where I was, where I can observe my mind and body and react to what comes to mind. I kind of stopped reacting to it for awhile and I don't know why.

I don't know which one's the cause and which one is the outcome, but now I can feel happiness again. Like today, when Leon watched his TV show with his lion under his arm next to him and fire truck in his hand. I just felt happy.

(The phase when I didn't follow urges could've been there for safety, our system was triggered and there are self harming parts. So maybe that's why I just sat and stared into nothing also when in my mind I didn't resist their thoughts at all anymore.)

What ever the reason was, it seems to be over now.

***Did your boys like forest ball Johnny-Jack?

Floralie wrote:***Did your boys like forest ball Johnny-Jack?

We haven't made our way to a forest or even very wooded area for a while and I'm not sure we have a kick ball that's inflated! But Luke did walk a bit around our nearby park with a tennis ball.

I was so dumb, I started the walk, then bounced the tennis ball on the sidewalk and thought, hmm, this is okay, as if my opinion of bouncing the ball mattered. Luke was nearby but hadn't been out in quite a while. Then he fronted and took some time getting adjusted to the body and this park. After a while he started bouncing the ball though, and yeah, he enjoyed it, like the kid he is. There were some trees around but no forest. Still, I guess we played a cousin of forest ball for now.

Thanks, Jules, you're a clever kid and Luke had a good time!