Request for advice; conflicting 'T-advice'

**TW** mentioning MC, no details**

We e-mailed the T from next week and asked him how much he knows about DID, if he's supervised and, unfortunately already, if he has experience with the consequenses of programming and the torture techniques with that. Those techniques shouldn't be processed but 'reversed' in some sort of roleplay/symbolic thing, is our feeling. Or something 'in return'. Don't really know how to describe it but it feels as if processing those happenings (which are ofcourse also trauma's) will deepen the programming. That's why this feels so dangerous in a treatment that brings up and tries to process (attachment)trauma from the very beginning.

That way we'll know right away.

That shrink just saw it, B felt that when he asked about the condition, and because of how he asked it. That this was about SRA. After that he told us to quit the intakes with independent T's because we need DID professionals. It felt so entitled/demanding to ask the T about his experience, but ok.

Thanks again and also from me, everybody. Closing these doors again.

Er

I hope you find a T or a clinic or a something to help you because it sounds like it will be really hard

Thank you NyxX <3

To expand on why not to see a therapist without training or experience treating DID: you are in a special situation. You are local to a world expert on DID and many therapists influenced by him if not trained by him. In your community no therapist can be unaware of DID, so any established therapist who has no experience with it has chosen to have no experience with it.

That's a good point, I think. On the other hand, hé referred me to a T with unhealed DID. It's possible that the T's who think he has a bit of an unhealthy guru image, detect something, and therefore don't 'buy it', like I have with Alice Miller, for example. Either way, you're right, it's 'devided' quite clear, in T-land. And since this country makes very little progress on many levels (we're one of few if not the only country in the world where the very racist use of blackface is not even not against the law, but encouraged, for example, it's a 'culture thing' like christmas; a few months a year, people dress up as colored people and 'act silly', it's absurd and it's still happening), I don't know if vdH is bad news (the T with DID could have been programmed, this could be a nasty network. It's crazy but it cán be true. It's a very 'easy group' to mess with, because nobody cares about multiples, here) and getting all the room he needs for that because nobody steps up, or if way too many T's are behind, with even believing DID exists, because of the mentality of this country.

Edit: Cults are like religions; people want to admire and 'believe'. That's how the world treats vdH right now. A part of me wants the 'down to earth approach'. DID isn't very different from other psychological damage, it's just a bit more severe. The mechanism itself isn't unknown to ány T; pain, denial, internalised nastyness; it's how the brain works. It happens in everybody on different levels. A T just has to also treat dissociation. That's the new thing. We're drawn a lot to wanting a T who's nót in the 'selected few vdH circle' but just knows the mechanisms. But that could very well be a mindset that's influenced by how this country deals with stuff. I don't know, and it's scary to really don't know.

I have a friend who is training to be a T in this country and in all her years of study (over 6 years now), DID was only mentioned in one powerpoint, given three slides.

Most Ts have no clue about DID. There is still debate about whether they "believe" in it.
It's not as good of an environment as one would hope.

Hi fireheart, didn't see your post until after we made our 'edit'. And yes, exactly. I first thought that this is the place to be with this, becáuse of the vdH 'hype', but no, not at all.

Wrote the T last Friday, and he didn't respond yet. Patience isn't my best trait Our appointment is this Wednesday. There were T's before who just didn't respond anymore in the middle of conversations about treatment for our DID. They probably think we'll forget anyway. We're not going to show the same complete lack of dignity, so if he hasn't responded yet tomorrow, I'm cancelling the whole thing with an e-mail, and I wont just not show up 'in return' (would've done that in the past). We have a second appointment with that place from last Friday, next month. They'll know by then what's up with the clinic and it's waitinglist and stuff, and they said that they can work together with the clinic; them doing one part, the clinic doing other parts of treatment. Just like we suggested, but then in combination with an independent T. Too bad it's a whole month. I liked that place and especially the shrink. But, we're getting somewhere.

B

I would recommend not cancelling the appointment.
Sometimes Ts and people take a week to respond to emails. Usually they want to take time to think about their answer, and sometimes they're just very busy.

My T usually doesn't respond to emails other than writing "read". My guess would be that he would address your concerns in-session.

Good luck! So it's Wednesday and not Tuesday.

I get where you're coming from, but the question was; do you have experience with DID & supervision (and details). If he doesn't have that, he should say that to give us the chance to look further. If he has, it's appropiate to make that clear quite soon? Why would we pay 30 bucks for a train to a T who won't/can't treat us? Am I having a big blind spot here (chances are; I have )?

B