Auto Pilot

Hello Everyone
Its my first time posting and im quite excited to have found a safe place here with you all.

My Names Sam ( Samantha The Protector) and im the 2nd Split to my Host.

Ive recenently been promoted to host duties ( taking care of the body and the others inside ).

and while ive never used auto piloting before , my host Sarah has alot.. she tends to use it in stressful situations.


since ive taken duties i tried using auto pilot when our bavk was killing us and we couldnt move. even though the body is moving and doing everything it should be.. it feels like while im auto piloting the body is " souless " it walks with no emotions or feelings or even consiounse...

is this normal ? im new to the whole host duty things..im not even sure if there will be any changes because i took on these duties..


anyways thank you for reading and have a nice day

Hi to Sam, Sarah and everyone. For us, when anything that feels like auto-piloting happens, it's been another alter who's actually fronting. I used to use the phrase "auto pilot" a lot to describe how things felt when Jonathan took over. I could watch and marvel at how "I" could both be doing everything smoothly and not be paying that much attention to what "I" was doing. It took us a while to realize what was actually happening.

Theberrysquad2 wrote:even though the body is moving and doing everything it should be.. it feels like while im auto piloting the body is " souless " it walks with no emotions or feelings or even consiounse...

When Sphinx, an internal self-helper (ISH), fronts, it feels very much how you describe, but since I know it's one of us, I describe it more like a robot who has no human feelings.

Welcome to the forum, I'm quite new too!

With the 'auto-pilot', it sounds emotional, or a lack of, rather than just doing chores? We have a body alter (if that is the right term?!) called 'Robot', who is in charge of certain body reactions, and can do some repetitive tasks over and over...but I wouldn't say he was soulless, or not emotional, those ideas just don't really fit.

welcome to the forum! i've always been very confused about whether that auto-pilot feeling is just dissociation or someone fronting, so i can't really give you an answer as such.

in terms of personal experience, we have a theory that someone here - lain - is acting as our "auto-pilot" when things get bad, but i'm not sure if it's them fronting / co-fronting with me or if i'm just dissociating and "auto-piloting" through my day-to-day. i find when the auto-pilot kicks in that my memory goes down the drain, but not quite in the same way as when someone else has fronted, though i'm still wondering if i get "amnesia for amnesia", as it's been put to me. i also don't experience a sense of "someone is here with me" like i usually do during co-fronts, but i also feel like i've been separated from the body and that i'm being used like a puppet when the auto-pilot is active, so it's weird.

i'd love to better understand stuff like this, i feel like if i knew whether the auto-pilot feeling was just dissociating or someone else fronting / co-fronting that i'd be able to deal with it better.

When I get that feeling of being on auto pilot I don't even realise until after I come back online. I think Z is fronting and suppressing me and stopping me from thinking or feeling.

It's always in situations we find stressful and I just switch off. No thoughts no feelings. Wherever we are we will leave as quickly as possible and avoid the most people and go to somewhere we can be alone. I've been told I completely blank people who try to talk to me or people that I'm with at the time.

When I come back I will always remember what happened and where I went and who was around. And Z is really big on the fact we must always share the body's memories so we can be consistent. Her motivation in everything is protecting the system and she doesn't like fronting so if she feels she has to will get it over with as quickly as she can. So it seems like something she would do.

We have what insiders call a hawk, and what more fronting parts see as the dissociative state that comes with floater awareness (as if you watch things from outside your body). That part co-fronts when things get intimidating or alarming for who ever fronts, and thát part definitly has the feeling of doing things on auto pilot on those moments. I think these situations might be the cause of our ADHD diagnosis (although almost everybody in our family has ad(h)d); the co-fronting part starts to loose focus/concentration a lot on these moments, doesn't listen very well, and talks fast and a lot, often. The 'hawk' watches and hears everything and has an almost photographic memory that's shared with others afterwards. I think that's calculating possible danger or something.

We also almost always have the auto pilot feeling when people are a bit overwhelming and we can't stay very present because of that. We always regret a lot of what we've said and done afterwards, because it doesn't feel honest/true to our values to us because of going with the flow too much.

Er

Thank You all you lovely people for answering

After reading everyone's comments, we figured out that it was a different alter ( split ).
About 2-3 weeks ago a lot of $#%^ went down and he appeared when our former host ( Sarah ) was in charge ..she kind of forced him out when she was going through hard times subconsciously ....

At the time we were very confused as to who he is , where did he come from...ect
And since he never really appeared to us or talked to us we assumed we were just imagining it.

but after all the comments about the auto pilot ,we figured the feeling was him. it was the exact same feeling we felt the first time he appeared ( emotionless , doesn't care, gets the job done ).

we found a new one hiding between us.. he doesn't seem to really care about socializing or talking to us ( kinda like a robot ) .. we have noticed a crazy guy appears once in a while to say some lame joke and disappeared ... but i dont feel like that is him.. just another alter hiding between us ( he seems harmless but lame as fudge xD )

SoThank You everyone for helping out.. it was an eye opener for all of us.. since we've been together since we were kids..and Since our former Host ( Sarah ) Began to accept reality ( us and her DID ) the group is starting to reunite i guess

Thank You again Hosts and Alters , have a nice day everyone