Diet / health sabotage

Thanks Johnny-Jack.

I think some of our problems are cos we haven't got good communication with most of the system yet. And there's very few (if any) 'responsible adult' parts. At least, none who front regularily.

We do get to bed early almost every night (viola is the exception, one or two nights a week she stays up late) but I dunno if that means we're getting good sleep every night. We wake up a lot during the night, and are always up early too. We also excercise pretty much every day. Usually long bike rides, but sometimes we go on walks instead.

Its frustrating cos we know what works, we know how to eat right, and we know it can make us feel better if we stick to it. But different parts aren't willing to give up stuff, even if its bad for us. Or they do, for a week or so, then something happens, stress or whatever, and things end up out of control and stuff.

V2

Just a thought because I don't know all your specific details, but maybe...join them. Let the snackers loose. Tell whoever it is that they're welcome to eat whatever they want at 8pm, or on Tuesdays, or even anytime, whatever. It's going to happen anyway so why not sanction it for a given amount of time, like a month or whatnot?

I say this because for years I've seen my adopted son go thru the cycle of dieting, eating carefully, inevitably bingeing, self-recrimination, restating goals, vowing not to go off the wagon again, repeat from beginning. It was never an issue of will power. He knows now who's been doing this, he's communicating, little Sweets isn't eating in secret and seems much happier. They still eat snacks but fewer and without so much guilt and secrecy. My son is aware of the positive emotional value of treats and not keeping those alters restricted until they can't stand it or something.

He helps guide things a bit when they eat sugary snacks and doesn't seem to get so frustrated or see it as failure. There are other snacking littles and they're talking now about their joy in eating these goodies. They're losing weight.

I'm doing something similar with my teen alters but instead of frustration with bingeing it's been over their use of our time. No amount of frustration has worked. I feel like I have to be on their side and drop my stance of opposition. They're me (and vice versa) after all.

Opposition usually...does...not...work for us. So we're putting our energy into alternatives cuz we had to try something different.

Thanks Johnny-Jack. Without good communication I dunno if that'll work. We have tried having time where its ok to indulge. Littles Days with cookies and fun food and stuff. The last couple times it hasn't worked out, but in the winter it made them really happy, but didn't stop them wanting stuff the rest of the time too.

Things have been slightly better the last week I think? Weekends are usually the worst, cos first Viola is around for a couple days and she's kinda IDGAF about the whole thing, and then weekends there's less structure and its easier for others to start pushing for more.

This weekend tho, there was no chips, no junkfood. Some stuff did get bought & eaten that wasn't really on our 'plan' but I don't think it was excessive. And even some healthy stuff too, like we got craving snacks and instead of finding junk, they just had some veggies & dip.

Fingers crossed we can all keep to it. So far it's just like, "one week in a row" so its gotta become a pattern or whatever. But we're hopeful.

V2

I dunno if this is 'progress' or whatever, but I think we're starting to realize that one of our problems is we aren't listening to the body.

Like, we're not paying attention to hunger cues, we just eat 'cos its time' or 'cos we want to'. And we've never really been aware of whatever is the opposite of hunger cues. Full cues? Had-enuff cues? lol. We just eat till the plate's empty. Or the package or whatever. Eat till the food's gone.

Sometimes we start to feel bad and then we know we ate too much, but usually that doesn't happen till its like way too late. I'm pretty sure we've never got (or noticed) some kinda signal from the body that's like 'youve eaten enuff to be full but not enuff to feel sick'.

Anyways, so past couple days we're starting, we're trying, to pay more attention. Not eating if we're not hungry. And trying to pay attention close enuff to know to stop when we've had enuff. Not just eat cos its lunchtime or whatever.

Its more than just food too, like when we get injured or something, we tend to not notice. Like just block out the pain and stuff. It takes a long time to notice stuff like 'is this swolen? is it infected? how'd that happen?' and then to try to remember to keep it in mind and not just instantly ignore it again.

But I guess food's the big one, it's the thing that has the biggest long-term impact.

Anyways, just a thing I noticed in the past couple days & been thinking about.

V2

Body awareness. We have to work on that too.

Thanks, V2.

Charity and others

I'm so disappointed right now I don't really know what to write or where to post it.

Its been a year since the body had some surgery. That was a big disruption in all our diet and excercise protocols, and it seems we never got back on track properly after that. Yes they've been doing excercising, but not as much as before, and not as often.

Worse though, it looks like everyone's been treating the body like trash. Eating what they want, how much they want, then occasionaly being upset about how its fat.

I just threw out a big bag of processed crap frozen food. There's no actual fresh / healthy food in the house.

I'm tired and disoriented and the body feels like crap, aches and pains, and it looks like $#%^.

V1

Just wanted to wish you guys the very best with your diet and health!

It's a real tough one for every human, no matter who or what the situation and stuff, so you're totally not alone.

I guess, our thoughts are, that diet and health does kind of go in waves, like everything. Thats a part of it, right? So, not to be too harsh on each other, or yourself, or the body. Like, there isn't a kind of 'thing to stick to'...you get a bit too much one way, then you re-balance to the centre, then go too much the other way, then back again... and thats just life right?

We used to eat a lot of crap, yea...a lot! But as we connected more with the body, we realised it caused us, and the body, a lot of pain. It was following the body that helped us change really, as it meant less pain, less 'highs and lows'... and that was a real good thing.


Wishing you guys the very best with it! Don't be too harsh on yourselves!


Gothika