Tips for a controlling alter

I'm wanting some advise on how to best work with Anime. They are the kind of 'boss' in the sense that they don't really let others decide certain things and when out is always wanting to be the one in control. A few examples of what I mean:
When a friend went to the hospital I let Anime in control because I didn't think I could handle the situation. Anime handled it fine for us, but was in more control than our friend's wife. Anime spent the most time talking to the doctors and monitoring his vitals than anything else. Normally this wouldn't be a bad thing, but she didn't even let my friends have much say in the situation when it had nothing to do with us.
Example 2:
Despite not being the first to split, and not being the one who can function our inner world (we're still trying to figure out who has the most control in here, we just know it's not Anime cause they have tried a lot) Anime has made them-self the kind of 'boss' of everyone inside. When a meeting of everyone takes place Anime will make sure they have the final say even if outnumbered in what everyone thinks we should do.

I've been working with Anime and everyone else to lessen this, but it's kind of out of hand. Does anyone have any advise for how to help Anime be more of a 'compromising leader' than a 'boss'?

Hi Zodiacdragon (cool name )

Sometimes Colin is in charge and he used to be just the same way as Anime. I mean it was his way or the highway all the time! That was because he's a Protector and they see everything black and white and are always getting ready to go into battle so everything has to be perfect. Colin's still really strict but he's not so mean anymore. Our T helped him understand that we don't need that kind of protecting anymore. Now he protects us by keeping the car and the house in good shape and checking security when we travel - stuff like that. He's happier now and we are too. We actually like Colin now (Evan practically worships him).

Iain

IainEtc wrote:Hi Zodiacdragon (cool name )

Sometimes Colin is in charge and he used to be just the same way as Anime. I mean it was his way or the highway all the time! That was because he's a Protector and they see everything black and white and are always getting ready to go into battle so everything has to be perfect. Colin's still really strict but he's not so mean anymore. Our T helped him understand that we don't need that kind of protecting anymore. Now he protects us by keeping the car and the house in good shape and checking security when we travel - stuff like that. He's happier now and we are too. We actually like Colin now (Evan practically worships him).

Iain

Thanks! Anime isn't our protector, they're actually our recorder best we can tell (Saggita is the protector). But from the sounds of it finding a way for Anime to do their thing and it be productive would be best. Giving them a kind of 'job' so to speak. I have a few ideas, I'll see what everyone thinks. Thank you!
~ Alex