Could I be an alter and not know it?

OK so I switched today into an alter that basically felt like my real self...a feeling I havent felt in over a year.

And I had a breakdown. Am I not the original? Or am I co conscious and the person I was before my crisis (that was under high mounts of stress and truama and ptsd and weed induced anxiety) is the real me?


Idk who the real me is. But I guess im me but I'm dealing with a traumatized alter from over a year ago.


This is amazingly confusing.


All I know is I kept seeing this person run on a rod in the middle of nowhere tumbleweed USA on a long empty road leading sway from their selves. Just constantly running. They came up and realized what happened and it was too much for them despite them enjoying it and the. Ran back in after a few minutes.


I'm excited because this is the first time thats happened so whatever therepy ive been dping has been working if they actually revealed theirsleves

This sucks! I feel it so much I almost never know who I am and often feel these wierd feeling where I coconciousnes but also not coconcious and just a confusing mess where I trip so much internally (often somehow a part of me is able to function and not show it)

Are you still smoking pot? Ive tried quitting so many times Nd everytime I relapse and bascially forget 99% of what happened during the "sober" period so now I finally gave up trying (but again I dont even know who I a lot of the time)

Sry not sure this really helps

We have had what we call crises of identity many times. Our T suggests that all of us have equal validity as we are all, essentially, our self, just from different times of our life. It is a difficult concept for many of us to truly grasp however.

I appreciate what Little Daria writes about crisis of identity and all having validity being from different times of our life.
It’s scary feeling for us but maybe understanding takes some of the fear away

littleDaria wrote:We have had what we call crises of identity many times. Our T suggests that all of us have equal validity as we are all, essentially, our self, just from different times of our life. It is a difficult concept for many of us to truly grasp however.

How do we have equal validity ? I feel like theres one alter I prefer above others because this alter or alters helps me day dream and it seems everyone either resents or feels that we cant be happy or be "good and productive" if we focus on day dreaming. So it seems that part is suppressed...like they dont matter. And nothing I say changes how they feel about suppressing that part.

So I feel like we focus on healing everyone else but that part. The neglect and frustration from one of my most comforting parts is heartbreaking. Its my coping mechanism, its my joy....and I havent been able to be fully connected to it the way I used to be..in over a year..since I had a full on offical DID Crisis.

WeAreOne420 wrote:

littleDaria wrote:We have had what we call crises of identity many times. Our T suggests that all of us have equal validity as we are all, essentially, our self, just from different times of our life. It is a difficult concept for many of us to truly grasp however.

How do we have equal validity ? I feel like theres one alter I prefer above others

Yes, but you are only one member of your system. Everyone else's experiences and viewpoints are just as valid.

Just our 94 cents.

MDs
(who also see ourselves as having equal validity)