Going Down the Rabbit-Hole

I hope this will help. and not just distract you from something.
we have made our first and most important rule self-care. every other rule has to bow to it.
if it is needed for self-care it is ok.

yes I am nervous. I am sure a weekend on a secluded beach will do me right but who knows how crowded it will be? what if it makes me freak out more?

but I understand. we have been hibernating on the weekends but not really getting better.

whatever comes I can handle it. I hope though that the fresh sea air and the sun and the salt and the sand do perk me up.

I am bone weary.

it just may though......

Sounds like you have a plan for self-care. I hope all goes well!

Hi BeccaBee

Get out, enjoy the beach, the sand between your toes. Go for long walks, smile a lot, even just at yourself.

Hibernation leads to depression...we don't like it there.

Enjoy your weekend... Brett

LearnToLoveTheRide wrote:Hibernation leads to depression...we don't like it there.

Very true. And Vice Versa. It's a bad cycle.

Enjoy the beach!

thank you for the support.

yes. I don't often think of depression as something that relates to me but I can and do get into ruts. I have noticed more and more now that my anxiety is better managed that my underlying affect is flat and disinterested. of course I have avoided so many things since the great meltdown of 2013.

happy to report that beach experience was overall very positive. great weather. low crowd. stayed beachfront which is an absolute must from now on. huge game changer on the experience. got plenty of air and sea and sun and exercise. kid, dog, and self all happily exhausted. I need to get out more. slowly, carefully. testing what works in this new life I have. with my companions.

we had such a great time we decided to make it a family tradition to go to this beach and this hotel every year on the first weekend in autumn. I already saved it in my calendar.

well. I was going to record that I've been pretty fragmented and time warped lately and I don't know why.

but then I read that a mere ten days ago I took a spontaneous weekend excursion to the beach. guess it threw me off.

I have upcoming business travel. reckon I should ready myself for a good little spinner here.

I wish I knew what to do. like I can see it coming. trip. Halloween. thanksgiving. Christmas. new years. bam-bam-bam. and I know I'm going to get all wonky. and I play it real careful. I say no a ton. I plan ahead and minimize commitments and pencil in a lot of downtime and I know that minimizes it. prevents the real bender. but....i hate knowing that I am gonna get all wonky and that there is really nothing else I can do. except ride it out.

cowabunga

I rarely speak from the heart but I feel this is important.

I read this thread sometimes to catch up on my own life. and I wanted you all to know how meaningful it is to have you along for the ride. I really appreciate your replies. I ponder on them and realize new things. and it means a lot to know I am not alone. there is no friend in my real life with the capacity to receive intimate details of how this condition affects my life. to understand the vast, endlessly vast amounts of energy that must be devoted to managing it.

finding you has really meant a lot to me. and I thank you for your support and friendship from the bottom of my heart.

Hi beccabee,

Take care of yourselves. You're important.

Iain

This thread has helped me have the courage to come on the board and believe that it can really be ok. I can survive this . So Thankyou .