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First appointment with therapist, some tips?

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First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Serira » Wed Aug 27, 2014 8:44 am

On Friday I'm going to see a therapist for the first time. A year ago I went there like 3 times but then I left the country and travelled and denied my DID. I realise now it's real and I need help.
But I'm really nervous about it and scared and well I just wanted to ask if anyone has some pointers as to what I should say or ask cause I have no idea about where to begin.
Thanks
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Angelofmercy » Wed Aug 27, 2014 10:58 am

Hi Serira,
I just saw a new Nurse Practitioner yesterday, and I was really nervous, but found her delightful. My nervousness had more to do with not being able to remember all of the things I wanted to ask, and being able to express what was really going on with me.
What I did was 1) Make a list of all of my meds (even the ones that you are taking for different physical reasons)
2) Made a list of all of my physical problems, and surgeries etc.
3) Made a list of all of the psychological , more distressing problems I am facing right now.
It all went really smoothly, because I had it all there, and we touched on everything;
That took some of the anxiety out, and gave the Nurse Practitioner, a better overall view as to what is going on.....and I was less anxious, and the appointment went well

I do better if I make lists rather then having to remember everything when I'm nervous already KWIM?
Just some of my thoughts... :lol:
It's the Dance of Life that makes us whole. When you get the chance.....Dance
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Nondescript » Wed Aug 27, 2014 4:59 pm

First, give yourself props for taking the step to see a therapist. It takes guts! If you feel scared, affirm that it is normal to feel afraid and tell yourself you will do everything you can to take care of yourself and keep yourself safe.

Come with a list of questions for the therapist (perhaps about her qualifications, policies, methods, and of course ask of her experience with trauma and dissociation). Also, come with a list of statements about yourself or a list of experiences you would like to share, in case your mind goes blank or you get confused.

Don't be afraid to redirect the conversation if you feel it is not going where you need it to go. "Excuse me, I wonder if we can address something else instead right now." "I don't feel comfortable discussing that right now, but here's something I would like to talk about."

Be as frank as you can be without making yourself feel too exposed. Ask for clarification or feedback if you are not sure what she is saying or thinking.

This therapist may or may not be the right one for you. Remember she is not an authority on you, she is just someone you are hiring to help you. You can interview other therapists if necessary.
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Team78 » Sat Aug 30, 2014 6:29 pm

Begin to journal as much as possible about your day to day expereince. You mentioned you now realise its real. Talk through what's going on with you therapist as you begin to trust her. They are there to be a listeing non judgemental person to help guide you. Since your diagnosed, I found it helpful for to read self help books and attend groups therapy, in addition to indiviual therapy.
Dx: DID, PTSD, Panic Disorder

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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby firelamb67 » Sat Aug 30, 2014 6:33 pm

Serira wrote:On Friday I'm going to see a therapist for the first time. A year ago I went there like 3 times but then I left the country and travelled and denied my DID. I realise now it's real and I need help.
But I'm really nervous about it and scared and well I just wanted to ask if anyone has some pointers as to what I should say or ask cause I have no idea about where to begin.
Thanks


How did it go?

-- Sat Aug 30, 2014 1:35 pm --

Angelofmercy wrote:
I do better if I make lists rather then having to remember everything when I'm nervous already KWIM?



What's KWIM?
DID, BPD, DP/DR

What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
-R.W. Emerson
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Angelofmercy » Mon Sep 01, 2014 11:57 am

KWIM = Know what I mean LOl
It's the Dance of Life that makes us whole. When you get the chance.....Dance
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Serira » Tue Sep 02, 2014 3:35 pm

Hi, thanks for all the advice. I did start by asking her what she knows about DID, if she's helped others, .... And it helped asking her those questions, I felt more at ease once I realised she knows what she's talking about. She understands in a way. It was still hard and I was glad it was over but tomorrow is the next appointment and I'm actually looking forward to it. Although I'm still wondering what I want from her.
What is it that you want from a therapist?
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby firelamb67 » Tue Sep 02, 2014 5:13 pm

Angelofmercy wrote:KWIM = Know what I mean LOl


Oh ok. Duh, if I had given it some thought I would have/should have figured that out.

-- Tue Sep 02, 2014 12:20 pm --

Serira wrote:Hi, thanks for all the advice. I did start by asking her what she knows about DID, if she's helped others, .... And it helped asking her those questions, I felt more at ease once I realised she knows what she's talking about. She understands in a way. It was still hard and I was glad it was over but tomorrow is the next appointment and I'm actually looking forward to it. Although I'm still wondering what I want from her.
What is it that you want from a therapist?


I want my T to be understanding and caring. I want her to call me on my b*ll**it and make me do the work. I don't want my T do give up on me even when i'm a butt head. I want me T to care. I want to know she she knows what she's doing. I want her to have answers and be confident. If she doesn't want to give me the answers she'll guide me to find the answer myself. I want her to help me heal. I want her to understand me. I want to feel safe and have a good and trusting relationship. And I have all that with my T.
DID, BPD, DP/DR

What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
-R.W. Emerson
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Una+ » Tue Sep 02, 2014 5:28 pm

Serira wrote:What is it that you want from a therapist?

When I started therapy I had no idea what my diagnosis would be. All I knew was something was very, very wrong with me and I needed help. So I wanted help. And a diagnosis.

My first therapist would not discuss diagnosis with me and was not much help either. Possibly he even set me back. I diagnosed myself, terminated work with him, and had the formal diagnostic workup done elsewhere.

My second therapist, someone I found to provide consultation to the first therapist, was a great help. She recommended and on occasion loaned books, selected and guided some of my work, taught me some valuable skills, and provided objectivity and reality checks. Although she had some blind spots and consequently gave bad advice on some issues, she knew all about DID back when I knew almost nothing. She had knowledge I needed, and she shared it with me.
Dx DID older woman married w kids. 0 Una, host + 3, 1, 5. 1 animal. 2 older man. 3 teen girl. 4 girl behind amnesia wall. 5 girl in love. Our thread.
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Re: First appointment with therapist, some tips?

Postby Serira » Tue Sep 02, 2014 6:32 pm

Yes of course I want my T to be helpful and understanding, but I'm still not sure what I want to get from those sessions... I know something is definitely different than with other people, but it doesn't feel 'wrong'.
Did your alters have problems with you going to a T? I feel a bit off since this afternoon,like coming up with a flu, although it's not like that. Came home from work and slept for 2 hours and even had the strangest nightmare ever, but it gave/ gives me the creeps when I think about it.
Could an alter be doing this?
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