Remembering things

I remember that when I was in high school, I had a hard time remembering information, even if I had studied the material. It would puzzle my teachers because I would be really good in class when it came to discussing the material but when I would get the tests, I would get a lot of things wrong because I would not be able to remember going over the material clearly. The memory would be fuzzy and that would make me confused as to whether or not the information was correct. Sometimes I wouldn't be able to recall the dialogue of the lesson. I would blame my ADHD for forgetting but I think it's something more than that.

I had that happen too. I was so good at the homework when it was open book, but on tests I was complete crap. I would know the answer, but not know at the same time. It was very confusing. But I couldn't blame it on anything. I would "daydream" a lot. Not thinking of anything and miss the whole class. I also believe it was/is more than poor attention span.

Also makes me think of the time last year, I was working on an essay for my English class. The essay was choosing two out of three essays about different views on a subject and comparing the two. I had written almost a page when suddenly, I couldn't remember what the assignment was supposed to be about. I re-read what I had written, my notes and the articles themselves but I couldn't make sense of any of it, like it was my first time seeing it. I didn't turn that assignment in because of my confusion and inability to understand the assignment for no reason I could understand.

Hi,

Hosts aren't supposed to remember things. They are built to forget easily. That's how our Host can go through his day making things look normal. Sometimes we take Host's memories - like the last session with our T that Host 'forgot' on the drive back to his office. He had to go back to work. He needs to have kind of a loose grip on memories. We know it gets annoying to him sometimes but it's better this way. And he's happier.

Iain

Hey, I don't know what color to use, so I'm just gonna stick to black. I remembered something about the host writing some stuff on this site about not remembering stuff clearly so I came here.

Anyway, I don't think it's just the host who has issues remembering stuff because I know I have issues with memory myself and I'm pretty sure the others do too. I think that fogginess is stronger with me than with the host to be honest, but I'm not sure about that.

Hi Aoki (?),

I have this theory that each of us knows how to remember certain things and how to forget other things. Like Host won't forget how to drive or use a credit card but forgets about therapy a lot. I remember my password for the forum but forget work things because I don't really need to know them. Anyway that's why we are so into journaling. It's a way to share what we know.

The big question is how much should we let Host know? Our T says we should tell him a little at a time but our Protectors say 'Nothing! Ever!' We still haven't figured it out.

Iain

We don't let Host remember things because they either aren't worth her remembering them or that they are something we really don't want her to remember. We protectors have been discussing what to share with Host but so far everyone says that we shouldn't tell Host anything yet, maybe never. I disagree, but there are some that I can't go against. I'm not that high up. I have some trauma memories but I am not to share them. I have memory issues too, not as much as Host though

Alyssa

I know that "feeling". I've not turned in homework because I totally forget ever learning the subject or how to do it. I also had an essay that I didn't turn it because I "forgot" about it. I really don't remember doing it, but it wasn't finished and I had no idea how to continue it. I've written complete crap before because I didn't understand the teacher or I didn't remember what the essay was about. I know how difficult it is.

I am worried about college and my memory problems. I mean I still get good grades, but just barely. It's getting kind of frustrating that I have such horrible memory problems now. They just keep getting worse and worse.

Hi,

All through school teachers always told Host 'pay attention!' Host tried and blamed himself because he couldn't remember. Then we went to college and it got worse. Finally Host gave up and went back to daydreaming in class. That was a relief! With Host out of the way we could listen to lectures and take exams. Host freaked out because he was getting A's on exams he didn't remember taking. Host was built not to pay attention or remember things. They can't just expect him to do it now. Anyway once Host calmed down, we were able to get people out who could study. It was the first time we really started to work together as a team. It was hard but it was cool too.

Our rules for school:
Everyone doesn't have to take the same class. Delegate.
Leave time for others to get their work done too.
Whoever goes to lecture has to be out for the exam.
Littles need care so they don't interfere.
Self-care, self-care, self-care. All-nighters lead to scrambled systems.

Good luck.

Iain

Hi everyone,

In my system, it seems like I'm the one handling classes and exams, all of them. I am also the host, but then maybe I should not. The forgetfulness and dissociative symptoms really don't help with personal autonomy or school. I seem to be getting better, though, I think. I know very little about my system, and it pretty much seems one part is trying its best to prevent any kind of communication between us and switching, although it seems it can fail at that last part, as I have discovered recently.

I don't always recall therapy, although there is very little going on at the moment there. I tend to be somewhat lost in the days of the week, but I always know which month and year it is.