Diagnosis similar to DID

Thanks, its really useful to hear it from other peoples perspectives and experiences.

Last November I bit the bullet (so to speak) and outright asked my therapist if I was right in thinking it was DID....she said yes! So when talking to her now about the diagnosis my social worker is thinking, she doesn't seem to sure and is trying to back away saying she's not qualified to diagnose, which is really frustrating and confusing. She's experienced working with DID, I don't get the feeling she will give up on me but 3 sessions ago I told her I'm going to crash and she just seemed to let it pass over her head. The last 2 sessions she's asked me if I still think thats going to happen, again, seeming to listen but not doing anything about it (maybe thats because there really is nothing we can do except what we usually do alone...plan for possible scenarios)

I've also been open and honest with my social worker, telling her what I/my therapist thinks (DID) and asking how a personality disorder would cover 'them'. She's admitted I sound like I dissociate but seemed to think there is a personality disorder, I'm sure going along a dissociative disorder path is the right one. Slap any other name on my forehead at the same time and I don't mind if it gets me help I need, but if it will make things harder in the future with getting jobs etc I don't want it. And now I feel down thinking it may not be DID, as crazy as it sounds, the outlook for DID is positive, that things really can get better over time. Wheras internally they say we won't get better if it's something else

One of my big debates on the day I see the psychiatrist, is whether to take a friend in with me or not. I've told her about the DID, she's seen them, seen me having panic attacks etc so I wouldn't have to worry about saying anything that would surprise her. But I'm not sure if I could say how bad I was really feeling (if I still was by then) with her in the room, because whenever I go 'missing' she's the first one my mum calls, so she may feel a duty of care to me and warn my mum I'm not so good.

Thanks for the tips on hospital, it's something I always have in the back of my mind. They can't right now, I would have to tell them when I'm suicidal or hurting myself for them to put me in, which inside we always decide not to tell anyone, although that changed last time because we didn't want to go home so admitting it seemed like the better option.

debetoile wrote:3 sessions ago I told her I'm going to crash and she just seemed to let it pass over her head. The last 2 sessions she's asked me if I still think thats going to happen, again, seeming to listen but not doing anything about it (maybe thats because there really is nothing we can do except what we usually do alone...plan for possible scenarios)

This is your therapist? She may be dissociating in those moments. When a conversation is stressful and the other person seems nonresponsive, often there is dissociation involved. The prospect of you "going to crash" may frighten your therapist a great deal. I am not sure what you mean, by the way. Is your therapist really clear on what you mean? Are you?

Do you have a clear plan? A written one? I can not emphasize enough how important it is to put in writing a personal safety plan.

debetoile wrote:if it will make things harder in the future with getting jobs etc I don't want it.

Why do you think that might happen? How would it happen? For what it is worth, I reported my diagnosis of DID to my employer, and they have been very supportive.

debetoile wrote:whenever I go 'missing' she's the first one my mum calls, so she may feel a duty of care to me and warn my mum I'm not so good.

How about discussing this with your friend? Also, would it be a bad thing for your friend to warn your mum? I can see where that would be a good response, actually.

debetoile wrote:I would have to tell them when I'm suicidal or hurting myself

Why is this a problem? What happens when you tell? What happens when you don't tell? Which is better for you?

Thanks

Una: What I mean by crash, is what some people call a crisis. Self harm, suicidal, dissociating/becoming detached from reality and feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope with even the smallest of things. I have told my T but not sure she knows what to do about it, will see what she says tomorrow. My social worker says she will get me to fill out some forms next time (another 2 weeks) about what i want/not want people to do and say in a crisis which sounds like what i've needed for a very long time. Will start making notes of things i want others to know as 'DID' means I often forget by the time I get there lol.

Worrying about it being harder to get a job etc. I worry about the stigma attached and if people see too many diagnosis on a sheet of paper they will become overwhelmed and panic as to what they think they should do. I guess they need to get to know me, and I'm really not the first one to have more than 1 diagnosis lol (thinking of all the other lovely people on the forum)

Hmm, guess I should bring it up with my friend one day, maybe indirectly to see what she thinks around the topic first or something. Will think about what to say for a few days.

When I'm at my lowest point. I push everyone away partly because it's easier that finding there is no-one there through their choice. But also because I don't want anyone to stop me at my lowest moments, although I'm screaming out wishing someone could help, each time I'm there, I always hope this time it will work. Plus they have a theory that if they tell someone they are going to hurt themselves, then it will mean that we don't really mean it, so we are lying and it wont happen (that is strange thinking, I know but yet somehow it makes sense to me)

I've just been across to the Personality forums. Whilst some things I can understand and say me too, its just one or two, which everyone has. So now I feel a bit better (everyone there is lovely, thats not why lol), because I really don't fit there, it's not just me making it up, I can feel it. I belong here, in a dissociation diagnosis, and with what I feel to be correct, they can't diagnose me with a personality disorder where I only tick 1 or 2 boxes and no-where near enough to qualify